#1
Hello again beautiful people! Me and my friend again wrote this song the other day! Its slow but i love the message that it holds!

I would love for feedback on absolutely anything! Anything you like or dislike about it! All your suggestions help me greatly!! If you do have a listen your the best! lol Smiley

Lyrics:

Verse 1 - Like we're swimming in a sea of fear, always always, like your drowning and the end is near, most days most days.

Standing tall but you come tumbling down, crashing waves, always, nothing's here but the silent cheer, of a new day and those rolling waves.

Chorus - The light of our mother, our brother, the light of our sister, our father, and each other.

Verse 2 - The rain it pours into our sores, torrential, and vengeful, when your best times, are when you lose your mind, forget it, regret it.

Levee shakes trembles and breaks, crushing waves, of bygone days, in the midst of this temporal glitch, its a new day, forget your old ways.

Chorus - The light of our mothers, our brothers, the light of our sisters, our fathers, and each other.

https://soundcloud.com/toastedandbutter/the-ocean-swells-blue-part-2

Thankyou all again!!!! Cheesy
#2
Hey.

I really liked this. The guitar part is very nice and very well played. It works very nicely. The melody in the vocals also flows very well and fits the guitar perfectly. I really enjoyed the harmonies to, it build the dynamics up nicely and add great interest and variation.

The song also flowed very well and had very god dynamic movement. A lot of writers struggle with this so you can be proud of that.

Being picking, I thought the reverb was to way and it struggled with sibilance from the s's in the vocals and also from the drums. But this does not ruin the song.

Well done.

I'd really appreciate it if you could crit a track or two of mine. https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1648005