When learning to chord I was taught to bend my fingers so that you can play the other strings not being pressed down without muting or semi muting them. I am now trying to learn how to scale and play lead and I'm confused on how to position my fret hand fingers so I efficiently play lead. I've youtubed several videos on fret hand technique and I've got mixed reviews. In your experiences are you supposed to flatten your fingers more when playing lead and scales or should you keep them bent more than being flat? Thanks for your help!
it sort of depends

for bluesier/rockier lead with a lot of bends and vibrato i would tend to flatten my fingertips, rather than using the absolute tip of my finger (as you do for more intricate chords).
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Ideally, you want to play as efficient as possible. This means you only need to apply your very finger tips and apply the least amount of pressure that is needed. It's a developed touch that comes with practice.
Playing chords is different as for some you have to barre across several strings.
The main difference with playing full chords and lead, or at least one of, is muting. When playing full chords, you want all the strings to ring out so you should press only the string you need and nothing else. However, for lead you kind of want the opposite. You only want the note you're pressing to ring out and mute everything else which can be accomplished by having your fingers/hand touching the other strings.

As for the exact technique, I'm not the best to give advice so you should probably look it up, try different things and see what works best.
I'd go with what Dave said.It all depends on what you're playing.A mixture of both is needed.If you're using bends and vibrato you'd use a flattened finger with your thumb wrapped more around the neck as it is your wrist doing most of the work.For quick legato/runs up the neck you want to be on your finger tips with your thumb resting on the back of the neck.
"shake out" your hand for a moment .. see the curve your fingers settle into when your hand is relaxed? that's what I shoot for, generally speaking.

As to how your fingertip is meeting the string, it depends, but generally the string for me would be in the middle of my fingertip, maybe a little closer to the fingernail side than the fingerpad side, and the first joint of the finger is mostly (?) perpendicular to the fretboard.

But it depends (it really depends) on what your hand is doing (or has been doing) -- some fingerings require different approaches to pull off (or . . hammer-on ?! .. man if I keep making dud jokes like that Guitar Player is gonna give me my own column . .). Also, finger angle into the string/fretboard is going to be a little different for each string, as you have to reach further to get to the lower strings, but that's the general idea anyway.

Hope that is helpful.

What's been frustrating me recently (a bit off topic) is chord fingerings that require two strings fingered with one fingertip (no bar). Ted Greene said you just work on it and eventually your finger grows to fit, so I guess I'll just keep on clammin' them notes . .