#2
I read this out loud a few times and I wonder what it'd be without the articles in the first, second, and fourth lines. "The" almost seems too didactic for the crystalline web that this is caught in.


really though, that's a nitpick - the way this presented feels more effortless than a lot of what I've read of you lately, and its brevity works incredibly for the ending note.
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




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theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
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#3
Quote by vintage x metal
I read this out loud a few times and I wonder what it'd be without the articles in the first, second, and fourth lines. "The" almost seems too didactic for the crystalline web that this is caught in.


I agree, without the articles it sounds a bit better in my opinion.

Anyway, I enjoyed reading it, thanks for sharing!