Poll: favorite type of number
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View poll results: favorite type of number
primes 2 through 23 inclusive
10 56%
#freewillt08
13 72%
Voters: 18.
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#1
forgetting all of my charm these days. really, how hard is it to be honest to a inexplicably cute girl? even without the distance between us, i'd be a useless twerp. even still i can't court.

when did you all figure out this horrible, putrid, asinine romance garbage, if you have at all? i haven't. looks that way. leave your thoughts on general romance here for me to read as i get back on my proverbial feet.

to be sure, i will overcome this roadblock quickly as i always do but i can't help but feel like i've lost it.

08
i don't know why i feel so dry
#2
31.75^2
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
#3
Maybe you're gay.
Plays:
Schecter Hellraiser Solo-6 FR Limited
Parker Mojo Fly
Ibanez SZR 720
Tanglewood Evolution
LaPatrie Etude DEMO
'66 Hagstrom Viking I (customized)
SGR C-7 (defretted)
Agile Intrepid 828

Amp, Pedals:
Laney LV300
BOSS RC-20XL
#5
Quote by Eastwinn
when did you all figure out this horrible, putrid, asinine romance garbage, if you have at all?

I'm 95% certain that no one (not even long-term married men) have romance & stuff "figured out".
#6
I suck at romance, but it's not like I've put in a tremendous amount of effort towards it.

#freeWillT08
#7
there is a lot to say but it comes down to some simple limiting factors:

- you must love yourself to have the capacity to love someone else in a healthy way

- you will always make mistakes, and the only way to make things okay is to sincerely apologize and try to be better

- a partner is a nice reminder of your own worth, but only if you remember and respect their own worth

- you must respect your partner: their abilities, their intelligence, their desires, their decisions
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#8
Quote by vintage x metal

- you must love yourself to have the capacity to love someone else in a healthy way

Could you elaborate? I've heard people say something like this before but I never understood how these are related. Loving yourself and loving someone else are entirely different "processes", for lack of a better word.
#9
Quote by sashki
Could you elaborate? I've heard people say something like this before but I never understood how these are related. Loving yourself and loving someone else are entirely different "processes", for lack of a better word.

I don't think so. If you can't love and respect even yourself, can you honestly expect yourself to be able to show love and respect for someone else?

You end up putting what you perceive as your own faults onto them.
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
#11
I asked everybody in my grade "why don't girls like me?"


I got various responses but was overall disappointed
banned
#12
Quote by sashki
Could you elaborate? I've heard people say something like this before but I never understood how these are related. Loving yourself and loving someone else are entirely different "processes", for lack of a better word.

You can love someone when you don't love yourself, but it's likely that you won't treat them well.

If you don't love yourself, you will seek out answers to your insecurities in the person you love, and they can help you answer them yourself, but they can never really answer them for you. It's easy to mistreat someone or become overbearingly possessive or any other number of things when you don't know how to love yourself yet.


That being said, loving someone can help you love yourself. It's not a black&white process. It just takes honesty with yourself and the other person.
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#13
Quote by sashki
You can consider other people superior to yourself and feel admiration and respect towards them.

It's unhealthy to put people on pedestals and view yourself as being below them. The idea is to admire and respect them, while having love and respect for yourself.
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A SIGNATURE.
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#14
Vintage, I find myself to be the opposite. I hate myself, but I like loving everyone else. I hate making things about myself, or even talking about me. I'd much rather love someone else than love myself.

Your viewpoints are very true, though
--

How do you say "I'm okay" to an answering machine?

--
#15
Just be upfront with her. Girls like guys who are honest because it makes them feel like they can trust you n shit. But dont be too honest or else you'll sound like a whiney bitch and then they wont trust you.
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#16
Quote by stratman_13
Vintage, I find myself to be the opposite. I hate myself, but I like loving everyone else. I hate making things about myself, or even talking about me. I'd much rather love someone else than love myself.

Your viewpoints are very true, though

I understand how you feel, and I felt the same way most of my life. That's also why I cheated on a lot of my previous boyfriends, had a hard time getting most things done without pulling strings, etc


I met my husband though and everything changed. To respect someone so much and to have the responsibility to help them with their particular insecurities helped me finally take my own advice on a lot of things. If I didn't do what I needed to do to respect myself, I'd probably be a bad girlfriend. Instead, I'm a good wife Sometimes people need something to really care about to change them, though. For me, it was him. For some people, it's their kids. For some, a job or hobby.
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#17
Quote by deadsmileyface
I asked everybody in my grade "why don't girls like me?"


I got various responses but was overall disappointed

why don't girls like me you guys
banned
#18
So you loved your husband and THEN learned to love yourself? Isn't that the opposite of what you originally said?

I don't understand a lot of these replies, to be honest. I might need a dictionary or something. I don't think I fully understand the concept of loving oneself.
#19
Quote by sashki
So you loved your husband and THEN learned to love yourself? Isn't that the opposite of what you originally said?

I don't understand a lot of these replies, to be honest. I might need a dictionary or something. I don't think I fully understand the concept of loving oneself.

I hadn't respected anyone I had been with until I was with him. That helped fuel a lot of the changes I was already trying to make. I did a lot on my own before I met him, though, and did plenty on my own afterward too. He was just good motivation.


And that's okay, you don't have to fully get it, just though I'd give you my input since you asked
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#20
I've never cheated on anyone, actually. I usually have he bad habit of centering the majority of everything around who I'm with
--

How do you say "I'm okay" to an answering machine?

--
#21
Quote by deadsmileyface
why don't girls like me you guys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByAQboptJIw
Quote by Sliide90027
But as a bigoted lemming, you have so cry an Alinslyite slur revealing you lack of reason and sense.


Quote by MusicLord16
BOB 1. ur 20 and two u like evil things and idk if u worship the devil
#22
Quote by deadsmileyface
why don't girls like me you guys

cut your hair you hippy
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
#23
Quote by deadsmileyface
why don't girls like me you guys


just gotta whip it out man, whip it out.
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#24
Quote by vintage x metal


It's easy to mistreat someone or become overbearingly possessive or any other number of things when you don't know how to love yourself yet.




This. Example: You want to know where your partner is at all the time when they're not with you because you don't feel you're good enough for them. You're paranoid that they're seeing someone else.
#26
Quote by stratman_13
I've never cheated on anyone, actually. I usually have he bad habit of centering the majority of everything around who I'm with

I feel like that'd be a lot of pressure to put on someone, which is equally not great.
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A SIGNATURE.
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#27
you guys have gotten so used to my incoherent and vague OPs that you didn't even stop to read into this one.

i don't know whether to laugh or to cry

laugh probably
i don't know why i feel so dry
#28
Quote by Eastwinn
you guys have gotten so used to my incoherent and vague OPs that you didn't even stop to read into this one.

i don't know whether to laugh or to cry

laugh probably

In fairness, I never read into what anyone says unless it's in a book.
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A SIGNATURE.
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#29
Quote by DonGlover
I feel like that'd be a lot of pressure to put on someone, which is equally not great.

Well I mean I don't literally make everything about them. Its more like... Hmm. It's a bit hard to describe. I'm just kinda... I don't like to talk about me or whatever. I'm super introverted and I always feel like talking about me is selfish. It's weird. I have difficulties with stuff like that. It's probably tied to a lot of things. Like I have some trust issues and with the depression and all I'm sure it stems from that.

But as it stands I just don't ask people out anymore because I'd just as soon leave my issues like these to myself.

But yeah, iputting pressure like that is bad.
--

How do you say "I'm okay" to an answering machine?

--
#30
fairly sure this thread is about me guys okay everyone else go home
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#31
Quote by crazysam23_Atax
I'm 95% certain that no one (not even long-term married men) have romance & stuff "figured out".


lolno, this is lame high school talk
Quote by ErikLensherr
Did you hear about the cockney Godfather?

He made them an offer they couldn't understand.
#32
Quote by vintage x metal
there is a lot to say but it comes down to some simple limiting factors:

- you must love yourself to have the capacity to love someone else in a healthy way

- you will always make mistakes, and the only way to make things okay is to sincerely apologize and try to be better

- a partner is a nice reminder of your own worth, but only if you remember and respect their own worth

- you must respect your partner: their abilities, their intelligence, their desires, their decisions

i do not love myself

i do not make mistakes

i am worth more and less than them at the same time depending on my mood

respect is for dorks

fight me




#33
The problem with that you can't love someone else if you can't love yourself rhetoric is that you're straight up saying that some people never deserve to be in a relationship and that's entirely bullshit. Stop living in a magical world where everyone gets to love themselves one day, it's extremely offensive to mentally ill people to put that on them
#34
Quote by GuitarGod_92
The problem with that you can't love someone else if you can't love yourself rhetoric is that you're straight up saying that some people never deserve to be in a relationship and that's entirely bullshit. Stop living in a magical world where everyone gets to love themselves one day, it's extremely offensive to mentally ill people to put that on them


may be that vintage x metal does not mean "love yourself" in the way that you mean "love yourself"

if someone asked me if i "loved myself" it would be equivalent to asking "have you accepted a significant set of strengths and weakness and associated them with yourself?" and i would say "yes, mostly". maybe that's what she means, maybe not, but if that is what she means, i don't find the assertion unreasonable.
i don't know why i feel so dry
#35
I don't agree with that either. You become a different person when you love another in the first place, the whole joyous part of being with someone is that you become this weird altered self but in the best way.
Quote by ErikLensherr
Did you hear about the cockney Godfather?

He made them an offer they couldn't understand.
#36
Quote by Eastwinn
may be that vintage x metal does not mean "love yourself" in the way that you mean "love yourself"

if someone asked me if i "loved myself" it would be equivalent to asking "have you accepted a significant set of strengths and weakness and associated them with yourself?" and i would say "yes, mostly". maybe that's what she means, maybe not, but if that is what she means, i don't find the assertion unreasonable.

This is what I thought she meant also
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
#37
Quote by Eastwinn
may be that vintage x metal does not mean "love yourself" in the way that you mean "love yourself"

if someone asked me if i "loved myself" it would be equivalent to asking "have you accepted a significant set of strengths and weakness and associated them with yourself?" and i would say "yes, mostly". maybe that's what she means, maybe not, but if that is what she means, i don't find the assertion unreasonable.

Either way I'm completely ****ed, I guess.
Another 60 or so years of being alone? Yay
#38
Quote by GuitarGod_92
Either way I'm completely ****ed, I guess.
Another 60 or so years of being alone? Yay


i think vxm's advice sounds good, but we're complex people and no useful advice could be sufficiently ubiquitous. there's more than one way to do anything worth doing and if you think you can find what you need through a path less traveled, i would not be the one to discourage you.

it's no secret that i have very little figured out. i'd argue that i give an impression that i have more figured out than i truly do. but i've got this bit of optimism that one day i'll figure something out. i'll never get the whole picture and maybe that's the fault of being so fucked in the head but i take solace in the belief that tomorrow i may have a new perspective, one that's just a bit less opaque. maybe not tomorrow, maybe the day after. if i explore i should find something, right?

i constantly feel hopeless. like i'm not worth anyone's time, not even my own. to be sure, there are lots of people out there who wish they'd never met me. but i'm a creative person, or at the very least and i can appreciate the creativity of the artists i obsess over, and it's in the realm of possibility that their irrelevant insight may click into place and i'll feel some sort of direction. it's fleeting, but if i keep trying eventually i find myself downstream somewhere. somewhere less hopeless.

love, ean.
i don't know why i feel so dry
#39
Quote by Eastwinn
*post*

Word.

Idk if you're being 100% sincere or not but this is bang on how I feel all the time.
--

How do you say "I'm okay" to an answering machine?

--
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