#1
OK, so I know those genre tags sound ridiculous, hear me out though.

This piece originally started off as a Black Metal piece, beginning with the very jarring and depressing chord progression in the first theme. At the time my only influence was from bands like Ulcerate, Obscura and Dodecahedron. Later on I was listening to bands like The Kilimanjaro Darkjazz Ensemble and Bohren & der Club of Gore. This is what inspired me to essentially remove the distorted guitars I originally had in it. So then I was left with this really dissonant but "chill" Black Metal/Post-Rock piece. At one point I was bored with having just clean guitars so I decided I would solo over the initial chord progression and then later another one. Since these chords are quite dissonant, it was logical for me to take a Fusion approach, utilising whole-tone and diminished scales throughout the majority of the phrasing. Then as an after-effect, as I was recording it, I took advantage of some ambient synths I had to enhance the atmosphere, hence the ambient tag. The link for said piece is here .

So there you have it, I would appreciate any feedback and I most definitely will C4C. I don't know how you guys feel about the mixing but that's what I believe is my weakest link at this point. Also I'm not sure whether anyone else has experienced this but the hi-hats have lost some clarity since uploading to Soundcloud. I looked up the problem before I uploaded it and found that I should cut really high frequencies (above 20 khz), upload to Soundcloud as a lossless format (.wav in my case) and keep the volumes a little lower than usual (which I did keep lower by a tiny bit). I hope your listening experience is not affected by this.
#2
It's an interesting song. The chords really set a dark mood. The lead guitar is fine, but you should really lower the volume. A solo should sound like it's part of the band, not like it's playing over a backing track. Also, the notes of the solo sound great over the music, but the pauses in the solo that starts at 1:02 make the separate licks sound a little awkward. Bits of silence are good, but you should try to make them connect, either by using a sustained note, or by writing a more fluid solo. I don't know if I'm explaining myself well, but you probably understand what I mean. But overall, the song is great.

Speaking about songs with some black metal influence, please check out my latest song, Hangman For Hire. I write and record my own instrumentals. I'd love to hear what you think (in my thread, or on Soundcloud.) Thanks!
#3
First of all, thank you for your insightful critique earlier. I'm sure to take note from what you pointed out.

Now, your song is very interesting and somehow refreshing. I like the fusion elements, ambiance and overall vibe a lot. I think you did the right thing when you left those distorted guitars out. I would imagine that the song works better this way. The track is very original and it has lots of personality, which is a huge merit in my books.

If I had to point out something to improve the song, I would work with the mix. It sounds really good already, but I think the song could be enhanced even further with little tweaks. Lots of things have been covered up already in eatfresh1736's comment. To me, as well, the part around 1 minute was a little bit difficult because it's hard to really "hold on" to anything that's going on there musically.

Anyway, I certainly enjoyed it a lot. To me, your style has huge potential and great originality. That's really rare and it's something you should hold on to.

Cheers!
#4
Hey man! It has been quite a long while hasn't it? Sorry it took me so long to return the crit, I've been busy with stuff.

As for your song, it's really awesome and avant-gardey. Almost sounds like it belongs in a horror/metroid crossover. The synths throughout are probably my favorite part. They really set the atmosphere. Your chord usage is awesome, as well. I love the almost atonal feeling of it all, it really leaves a lot of room for improvisation. There is pretty much only positives to be said for this piece!

...

There are some negatives, however. The palm muted guitar at :45 is a little out of place, I think. I think the part would have been fine without it. Compositionally, that's the only thing I could find that bothered me! As for the mix, I think you need to bring up your kick and snare drums a bit (I think adding a bit of reverb to it and your snare would make for an interesting atmosphere and then a very slight boost around 80 Hz or so). I don't know if that's the kick drum sound you were going for, but I think it's a bit "floppy" (?). On the other side, I think the hi hat is a wee bit loud. I like how you mixed the clean guitars and the solos! The effects you used on the lead guitar was really interesting and it was awesome.

Other than that, I felt teased by the distortion at the end The ending does fit the song, but I would have liked if it went into a slow, held out chord thing with the distortion and the drums/bass took a more rhythmic "groove" while keeping the synths and clean guitars going.

I gotta give it an 8.5/10 compositionally and a 6.5/10 for the mix. Great jams man!
#5
@eatfresh1736: I have since lowered the volume to a level that is much more suitable IMO. I knew it was too loud from the get go, don't know why I didn't reduce it. I'll try another solo but to be honest, I was pretty happy with the jarring fragmented phrases. Normally I'm very continuous and fluid with my leads but I desired something that was completely different. Thanks for your feedback.

@Akkeli: No worries, I hope you benefit from it. I'm glad I left the distorted guitars out and it was a good challenge, something I might continue every now and then. I appreciate your comment on the originality part, that is first and foremost my goal. I've already finished writing another piece in a similar vibe to this one but even more dissonant and more influences from Doom Metal like Ahab.

@DiminishedFifth: Thanks so much for your feedback, it's really appreciated. No worries about time, stuff happens. I think I'll spend a little more time integrating the synths based on your comments. I've also spent some time on the drum kit since reading your feedback and it has made some drastic improvements. You really hit the nail on the head with that one.
#6
It's definitely not my "thing" but I thought it was very well done for what it is. I agree with the other fellow about the lead parts being a fair bit too loud, but that was the only thing I could think of to point out. The rest of it is very, very nicely done. Crystal clear and airy. I wish I could get my recordings done so well.

c4c: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1662800
#7
I love all the sounds and openness in the intro. I'm not really a fan of the palm-muted part that comes in around :45. I really like the distorted solos; the first one especially fit perfectly

I like this piece because it never settles; there is ALWAYS tension from the off-beat parts, frantic hi-hat beats, dissonant chords, et cetera.


C4C? Links are in my sig.
#8
@Elvin Presler: Well thanks to the various comments I've improved the mix even more. If I release it as an album, I'll hopefully have a more consistent quality.

@herby190: I might try a slight variation on that section, maybe lower the volume of the guitars and have the synths at the end play there as well. Glad you liked the tension, I've been enjoying dissonance a lot lately. Also, I've already C4C'd one of your pieces for this one. However I might have a new one up shortly, I'll take a look at the most recent one you have up if I can get the piece recorded and put up here.
#9
Immediately impressed by atonal variations that spin the ear through an array of crazy corners and slippery shadows in a musical way that is strangely appealing. Full of clever creativity, this restless piece gently meanders through odd fantasias of fertile invention, lush with organic growth like an enchanted forest of sound.
Full of unexpected twists and turns that never jerk or jar, but seem to slide and segue through a mosaic of interweaving variegations. Slightly eerie, subtly seductive, this unique composition of eclectic congruity is full of cerebral intelligence and penetrating profundity.
The impressive instrumental palate is produced beautifully. Perhaps the hi-hat and the lead guitar should be brought down in the mix, but overall this ambitious vision is articulated with a slick understated style.
This music is progressive in the fullest sense of the word. An advance avenue into pioneering territory, stimulating and thoughtful.

For something different, please see this psychedelic song.
#11
@Jathon Delsy: I have heeded your words, when I have a few more tracks recorded in a similar style to this I'll release them together with the new mix.

@aaron aardvark: Thanks for the critique. It's not actually the hearing range you're worried about, but the Nyquist-Shannon sampling theorem (trust me, I study Electrical Engineering). Actually I noticed you're a Mechanical Engineer from your profile so you would most likely understand it. You can look it up but its essentially a statement regarding the necessary density of sampling to accurately reconstruct a continuous signal from its discrete counterpart.

@mike_197: You're in luck because I've got more like this one on the way. I'll let you know when the next one's up if you want (just let me know).
#12
I listen to a lot of avant-garde-ish and progressive black metal like Ved Buens Ende, Sigh and Vladimir Cochet and I also like me some dark jazz every now and then, and I have to say that I really like this song. Some sounds you used are a bit low quality, but overall by it's composition and delivery I found this really interesting in a good way. Your story about the development was also really inspiring, this is one of my favorite songs I've heard on this section, great job!