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#1
Without further ado, and I apologize to the regs for making them wait so long--here is the new NFL thread!

Talk about National Football league here, whether it be the rules of the game, events, player news, transactions, offseason, the game itself, I don't care, talk NFL. Hell, as long as it is non-NFL football related (AFL, CFL, UFL, NCAA, high school) and it doesn't get taken too far off topic, go ahead, as long as it makes it back to NFL talk soon enough.

Old thread: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1636998

Here is a list of who roots for whom. Names that are italicized note a user's second-favorite team of which they show strong devotion to. I erased some names of users no longer with us, if anyone wants to be added to the list just ask


AFC East
New England Patriots - Death_switch; big-T; Andrea55
New York Jets - Cadj; kalanz808
Miami Dolphins - iro-bot31; Dreadnought
Buffalo Bills - lbc_sublime

AFC West
Denver Broncos - Paroxysm; bradulator; Pan-Tallica
San Diego Chargers
Oakland Raiders - shadow__666
Kansas City Chiefs - sloppyjoe24; Death_switch

AFC North
Baltimore Ravens - necrosis1193; muffinduck01; blake1221
Pittsburgh Steelers - Jackal58; shotgunmerc
Cincinnati Bengals - darkcheef
Cleveland Browns - lucky1978; AeroRocker; Lion_Slicer

AFC South
Houston Texans - Pan-Tallica; jetfuel495; chordmonkey96
Tennessee Titans -
Jacksonville Jaguars - primusfan
Indianapolis Colts -

NFC East
New York Giants - theogonia777; chordmonkey96
Philadelphia Eagles - Gibson_SG_uzr55; Jako215; I.O.T.M; WCPhils; behind_you; Toadvine
Dallas Cowboys - thefuzz454; blake1221
Washington Redskins - CoffeeBeans

NFC West
San Francisco 49ers - bdof; Kensai; lolmnt
Arizona Cardinals -
Seattle Seahawks - daytripper75; TSmitty6; Tanglewoodguit; due07; magnus_maximus; SGstriker
St. Louis Rams - jimihendrix6699

NFC North
Green Bay Packers - JustRooster; wastingyears; ehbacon
Detroit Lions - Rockford_rocks; Gibson_SG_uzr55
Chicago Bears - lbc_sublime; darklite41; CashCow; Mr E Meat; progdude93
Minnesota Vikings - jambi_mantra

NFC South
New Orleans Saints - crimsonblood12
Atlanta Falcons - TEK34
Carolina Panthers - Skynyrd890; jazz_rock_feel
Tampa Bay Buccaneers - lolmnt; Strato-Massacre


Have fun!


HALL OF GUARANTEES, FAME, AND SHAME


Necro's Captain Kirk Logs
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/search.php?searchid=13791253

Quote by Gibson_SG_uzr55
RGIII will be better than Newton

Quote by Jako215

Not gonna lie. Luck is gonna be a bust. Gay Run Tee it.

Quote by Shotgunmerc
I guarantee the Lions winning the Superbowl within the next three seasons. OP it now bitches.

Quote by necrosis1193
The Browns will be a bigger threat in three years than the Bengals in the AFC North

Quote by Gibson_SG_uzr55
Kaep is forever a pussy

Quote by SGstriker
How bda ar thee Succaners? Sresoly?
The Jags andd the Bucs shooulldd play inn the Sucker Bolw

EDIT; mybe I shouldd've ussed beer instedda of whiskeyy...

Quote by Cadj
Quote by necrosis1193
Yesss 2013 NFL rulebook is finally available for download
This is the single geekiest post in this entire thread.



Quote by necrosis1193
You better watch out,
You better stay home,
You better turn off your cellular phone,
Santa Favre is coming to town

He's leaving the game,
He's leaving it twice,
He's coming right back with the Jets and the Vikes
Santa Favre is coming to town

He sees the stunted blitzing,
He has a mean pump fake,
He'll throw it even where he never should,
So you better just buckle up and pray,

You better watch out,
You better stay home,
You better turn off your cellular phone,
Santa Favre is coming to town


brought to you by wrangler jeans


Quote by necrosis1193
This Broncos team is too good to win. If the NFL has shown me anything, it's that dream teams never pull it off. Division round loss, but an all time classic.


Quote by TSmitty6
Seahawks will repeat.

Quote by big-T
Quote by Death_switch
Quote by big-T

Would have been pretty funny if someone had moved from the Pats list to Seahawks one!

Nah, Tangle has always had a strange aversion to the Patriots
first Tangle joke of the thread and it's on the first page!


Quote by SGstriker
Jaguars come in 2nd in their division this year. May or may not make the wildcard.



Quote by Shotgunmerc
I'll guarantee the Skins winning the NFCE this season.


Quote by WCPhils
@ DAL *Thanksgiving game
vs SEA
vs DAL
@WAS
@NYG

5-0

Quote by WCPhils
Eagles gonna win the superbowl after every other player gets arrested/suspended


Quote by big-T
Quote by Death_switch
Pats vs. Hawks Super Bowl, Lynch gets arrested for violently domesticating some people in the days leading up to the game and the Pats win courtesy of a goal line fumble by Turbin in the final seconds of the game.
Ridley fumbles it the play before the 2 minute warning and Dan Connolly runs it in for the score, reminding everyone of his sweet kick returning skills in the process.

Quote by necrosis1193

On a scale of Andy Reid Game Management to Earthquake Saints, how much Handing The Ball Off To Marshawn can I expect?

Quote by necrosis1193
The contestants for best name this year:

Hilarious name puns: Dreamius Smith
Absurd and overvoweled, aka "Best Hawaiian": Owamagbe Odighizuwa(runner up: Ifo Ekpre-Olomu)
Same name as current veteran: tie, Michael Bennett and Michael Bennett
Best alliteration: Zach Zenner
Best use of the letter Z, aka "the Juszczyk": Konrad Zagzebski, who also wins the Annual Soviet for name that most sounds like a Russian spy from a cold war movie.
Best noun-based name, aka "The Mister Cobble": Junior Salt
Best adjective-ish surname, aka "The Mercilus": Andrew Manley
Blackest name, aka "The Key and Peele": tie, Rob'Donovan Lewis, Yannik Cudjoe-Virgil, and Valerian Ume-Ezeoke
Whitest name, aka "The Dan Smith": Tie, Austin Collinsworth and Jesse James
Badassest football-sounding name, aka "TheTimmy Jernigan": Floyd Raven, Jr.


They shall fight for the title of best name.

Quote by SGstriker
Quote by Gibson_SG_uzr55
If the Raiders actually pulled that off they'd be an instant playoff team holy shit haha



I'm sorry. Just the thought of it.


Quote by necrosis1193
A hearty application of Philly Logic™ Sauce™, a.k.a. a strange combination of alcohol - anything works - Donovan McNabb's tears, three hand-liquified japalenos, and whatever the bitterest thing you can find nearby is.

Quote by TSmitty6
Whoever is selected with this pick will be top 5 at his position in the next 2 years.
from Harvin trade
Quote by primusfan
Quote by SGstriker
I said this last year, but Jags are getting 2nd in the AFC South next year. Eventually, I will be right.

My entire life in two sentences.

Quote by Gibson_SG_uzr55
Quote by Carnivean
What? Because I think Peyton Manning is underrated?



Quote by Lion_Slicer

Quote by big-T
Per playoffstatus.com, for the Colts to make it, this needs to happen:
Colts beats the Titans, and
Broncos beats the Bengals, and
Falcons beats the Saints, and
Bills beats the Jets, and
Dolphins beats the Patriots, and
Ravens beats the Bengals, and
Jaguars beats the Texans, and
Broncos beats the Chargers
PLUS Case 1
Steelers beats or ties the Browns, and
Raiders beats the Chiefs
OR Case 2
Steelers beats the Browns, and
Chiefs ties the Raiders


So you're saying there's a chance! What's also crazy is that Denver still has a chance to either get the #1 seed or miss the playoffs entirely.


Quote by WCPhils
Next season


NFL Thread V8 Extra Salt

Quote by SGstriker
Quote by Dreadnought
Probably no one in here knows less about NFL than me

but that don't matter cuz Dolphins SB champs 2017



The bottom statement proves the top statement.
Quote by beadhangingOne
What happened to Snake?

Snake?

Snake?

SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE?!


Quote by TunerAddict
you can take my mouse and keyboard from my cold, slightly orange from cheetos, dead fingers


Quote by Baby Joel
Isis is amazing
Last edited by Gibson_SG_uzr55 at Feb 23, 2016,
#2
My posts are faster than Chris Johnson
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 73-78
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 2-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 24-7
#3
Is this where we talk about soccer and stuff?
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#5
why dont all teams play eachother? Westcoast teams pussy and can't deal with loosing to the eastcoast elite?
#7
lmao ayyy
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#8
I'll make a mock draft thread in the next few days
Quote by beadhangingOne
What happened to Snake?

Snake?

Snake?

SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE?!


Quote by TunerAddict
you can take my mouse and keyboard from my cold, slightly orange from cheetos, dead fingers


Quote by Baby Joel
Isis is amazing
#9
Eww new thread smell

'cause I'm surprised he's lasted nearly a week on the roster too...CHIMDI CHEKWA HYPE!
Quote by Cadj
Okay, big-T is a legend first and foremost

Quote by necrosis1193
You are awesome, Big T.

Quote by Trowzaa
Would like to publicly state that Big-T is my new God and Hero
#10
Quote by Gibson_SG_uzr55
dat fail

also ehbacon I'm sorry for all the times I got shitty with you about Suh after that edmodo thread

it was a sad feeling when I realized my fatal mistake.


also I'm glad someone enjoyed that thread
#11
This years prediction:

Go to Jimmy Graham bam Ave. Advance to Superbowl.

Also 9ers go 3-13. Called it before the offseason, sticking with it.


Also, as far as I'm concerned the Seahawks did win the SB last year, making my repeat prediction come true. I've just been blacked out this whole time since 2nd and 3.
58-32 NFL Thread Pick Em.
#12
Quote by TSmitty6
Also, as far as I'm concerned the Seahawks did win the SB last year, making my repeat prediction come true. I've just been blacked out this whole time since 2nd and 3.


Browns fan levels of Denial
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 73-78
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 2-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 24-7
#13
The whole Jimmy Graham vs. Bruce Irvin and Michael Bennett fued is ridiculous. If Bennett leaves it's only because of money and Dan Quinn, not Graham.

Think how many people you like and dislike at your job. You're not gonna leave your job because someone in another department is an asshole. You're gonna leave for more money if anything.


If Bennett leaves, well, that's 5 less penalty yards every game, but Mike B is the shit and is in the backfield constantly. Hope there's no truth to the rumor.
58-32 NFL Thread Pick Em.
#14
Quote by ehbacon
it was a sad feeling when I realized my fatal mistake.


also I'm glad someone enjoyed that thread


You see my post in the acoustic album thread? About the song idea
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#15
Quote by necrosis1193
Browns fan levels of Denial


I just haven't sobered up in 6 weeks. You guys just can't tell because I don't type like Gibby after 10 shots:

HueueueieieueieieieEaglessuckhuieieieieieieewhiskeyrjeiihuieieieieiieieieieitsmitty6isthebestehuihuieieiieieie.
58-32 NFL Thread Pick Em.
#16
New thread! Yay!

Bills offered Charles Clay 5yr/$38 million. Way more than he's worth imo, since that would make him the fourth-highest paid TE. I love Clay but I hope we let him walk. Especially since Jordan Cameron is an upgrade from him and is getting paid slightly less.
Last edited by iro-bot31 at Mar 17, 2015,
#17
Expectations for the Browns come in baby steps. Last year, they managed to keep the losses to single digits. Now let's upgrade to "not last in the division." Even though their top playmaker can be most accurately described as "none of the above."
#18
And you guys haven't seen shitfaced me in a long time because I don drink as often and wen I do, it's with friends. I used to drink alone
Quote by beadhangingOne
What happened to Snake?

Snake?

Snake?

SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE?!


Quote by TunerAddict
you can take my mouse and keyboard from my cold, slightly orange from cheetos, dead fingers


Quote by Baby Joel
Isis is amazing
#19
When you drink alone, do you prefer to be by yourself?

Maybe I'll get plastered for the draft this year and live post.
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#20
Gibby I'm going to go to GVSU and buy yo drinks!
UG Radio


Quote by ddrocksv3_4xpk
Thine Behold one rollin?
Quote by _T_H_R_I_C_E_
Lo, and the other lads be hating,
gallyvanting around,
attempting to catch me cycling in an unsavory fashion.




XBL: Panzyz

PSN: Dasan104
#21
Quote by Lion_Slicer
Expectations for the Browns come in baby steps. Last year, they managed to keep the losses to single digits. Now let's upgrade to "not last in the division." Even though their top playmaker can be most accurately described as "none of the above."


I can see what the Browns have done to you. I can feeeeel the weight. Feeeeeel the weeeeight.
58-32 NFL Thread Pick Em.
#22
Though it's not 100% confirmed - more extensive testing is being done at the moment - most recent reports are showing that Devon Still's daughter is cancer-free.

It's nice to have a happy ending to an inspirational story.

Also, first Pagano, then Kelly, now Leah? Football cures cancer.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 73-78
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 2-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 24-7
#23
Vikings are finishing second in the NFC North this year. Boom
No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable


@gossage91
@overtimefitnessau
#24
Giants vs Bills. Bills gonna win the regular season matchup but Giants are gonna win Super Bowl 50, aka Super Bowl 25 x 2.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#25
Quote by TSmitty6
I can see what the Browns have done to you. I can feeeeel the weight. Feeeeeel the weeeeight.

This time - this time, things will work out just fine.

#26
Quote by TSmitty6
The whole Jimmy Graham vs. Bruce Irvin and Michael Bennett fued is ridiculous.



Agreed. Not to mention it's completely different to be on the same team as the guy compared to playing against his team. I doubt either of them actually know him very well on a personal level.


Players trash talk. That's nothing new. You don't have to really know an opponent to say that you can't stand them.
#28
RIP Trent Richardson. Actually, signing with the Raiders might be good for him. Lower expectations, and that team seems like it's sort of starting to trend upwards.
#30
The boundary camera one is a no-brainer, the only possible reaction to that is "why isn't this already a thing?"

I'm in favor of expanding challenge scope, the major benefit would be cutting down on the whiners after every controversial call demanding asterisks on wins against their team. I can see them not doing it though since it's a "judgment call". But that argument is stupid because it's already built into the rules, that's why it has to be conclusive. If you call holding, and the replay shows no kind of contact whatsoever, then obviously that should be overturned.

Couldn't care less about the extra point. I'd rather they not change it, but if they did I would forget about it by the third week of the season.
#31
Feel free to add me under the Packer fans
'93 Gibson LP Studio (498T/490R)-Ebony
'14 Gibson LP Standard (JB/Jazz)-Ocean Water Perimeter
Epi MKH LP Custom-7 (SD Custom Shop JB-7)-Ebony
+More

Maxon od808|Boss NS-2|Boss CE-5|
Line6 G55|Korg Pitchblack Pro

JVM 210h|1960a(V30/G12t-75)
#32
Pats vs Giants, Super Bowl rematch 3.0.

Brady and Belicheck retire after losing to Coughlin and Eli a third time
#33
Ugh, Pats-Giants was played-out the second time, I don't care who wins, America loses if Pats-Giants is Superbowl L.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 73-78
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 2-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 24-7
#34
Seahawks-Colts.

I want that SB matchup
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#35
LOL Colts.

Over rated team with an extremely over rated QB.
Quote by Cadj
Okay, big-T is a legend first and foremost

Quote by necrosis1193
You are awesome, Big T.

Quote by Trowzaa
Would like to publicly state that Big-T is my new God and Hero
#36
Lol.

Well, I guess he is the second coming of Peyton Manning... Getting blown against the Pats
#37
Quote by big-T
LOL Colts.

Over rated team with an extremely over rated QB.



Calls team overrated.

Team made AFC championship last year.

Calls QB overrated.

QB was a serious contender for MVP trophy.


Okay buddy.
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#38
Seahawks/Packers for NFC representative. Probably Pats/Colts for AFC. NFL is kinda boring at the top atm. Like last year, the battle for wildcards in both conferences is more interesting imo
No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable


@gossage91
@overtimefitnessau
#39
The AFC in particular needs some new blood. Here's hoping we see the Dolphins or Texans pull some playoff upsets.
#40
Quote by big-T
LOL Colts.

Over rated team with an extremely over rated QB.


Why do Pats fans hate Luck so much
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 73-78
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 2-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 24-7