#2
really intelligent lyrics. powerful. meaningful. deep. touched me, really.

one of those songs that would sound better with a live band (well, live drummer, at least) as apposed to programmed drums. just the nature of the song's energy, you know? and how much life/character/attitude/whatever the song has and how flat and lifeless the drums are...

loved that descending riff in the chorus. the chorus itself was ****ing awesome. really cool aesthetic.

verse could be a bit tighter, you could experiment a bit more with guitar harmonies.

the song rocked. it was a hell of a lot of fun to listen to.
by the way, i stole this riff.
#3
Haha cheers man! Can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not on the lyrics. They weren't written to be intelligent, just a massive dig at drug dealers.

Verses could indeed be tighter. I'm one of those people that just records straight away when I have an idea rather than practising and perfecting. Will most likely redo the vocals at some point with a few changes here and there. Plus it needs a guitar solo.

Yeah, nothing beats real drums Unfortunately I don't have a studio!

Thanks for the kind words!
#4
oh, i was being sarcastic because i thought it was a sexual innuendo or something. drug dealers make more sense. haha you show those skuzzy bastards.

that's kinda the problem with a lot of stuff that gets posted on this site, a lot of great ideas but all hampered by the shitty reality that not everyone has the means to record in an ideal setting for their music.

still, find a band, find a drummer! people need to hear this stuff!!! plus, it'd be a blast hearing this live!
by the way, i stole this riff.
#5
The innuendo is there sort of.

Verse 1
Bored in a club, find a dodgy guy that is selling death sticks. He sells them.

Verse 2
Takes the drugs.

Chorus
Is basically as if the drug dealer is on a market stall selling fruit (London markets are a prime example) where they're all like "FIVE BANANAS FOR £3" in booming voices. The innuendos are there because you may as well be sucking the dealers dick if you buy from them. (I'm not on about soft drugs here, more class A's).

Verse 3
Is about the dealer telling you to share with your friends so they get hooked and buy from him also.


Here they are:
Death Sticks
Verse 1
You ain’t got much money
And it goes to show
Stand around lookin funny
And it’s all no no

I’ve something for you
So get over here
It won’t cost a dime
You’ve got nothing to fear

Verse 2
It might taste a little funny
Wash it down with beer
If the fuzz comes runnin
Then get out of here
And now you’re in for a shock
A big surprise
Feel that fever coming
You’re getting high on my

Chorus
Death sticks
Three for a fiver
Who wants to suck on my

Death stick
I know you want it bad
Death sticks
Pay now or later
Grab a hold of my
Death stick
You know you want it bad

Verse 3
Now you have a taste
I’ve some ready to go
Don’t let it go to waste
And just enjoy the show
Share it with your friends
A new drugs in town
Let them have a taste
Get them all hooked on my
#6
Thx for the crit on my tune. Listening to your song now. **** yeah this is cool man. I dig it. Awesome riff and a solid bass tone as well. The vocals suit the music too, raw and gritty. Catchy tune man great stuff ! I honestly have no critiques for this, very well executed.
#7
That's funny as.

Solid and clean production with quite unique (and suitable) vocals. I dare not ask what the lyrical inspiration was. I'm still trying to comprehend what a death stick is... a confectionery or savory?
#8
Quote by andyrooj
That's funny as.

Solid and clean production with quite unique (and suitable) vocals. I dare not ask what the lyrical inspiration was. I'm still trying to comprehend what a death stick is... a confectionery or savory?


Touchy subject for me really. It's dealing with a lot of self hate.

Death sticks is just a substitute for your chosen vice drug. For me it was MDMA.
The reality of how drug addiction gets shared, dealers profit from it, and fund their own drug use. To suck on my deathstick metaphorically means that taking the drug is just sucking the drug dealers dick.

Thanks for the compliments!
Check out my newest song about how people find real life drama / horror entertaining and how we turn it into a profit: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=33316499#post33316499

Also, drop me a link to your own for a comment back
#9
Thanks for the crit on my song! Sorry it took me so long to crit back.

Cool tones, I like how grungy the bass tone is. The vocals are good also. Mix could be a little beefier in my opinion, but I'm used to mixing huge metal mixes so maybe that's just me xD. Cool composition. Good job man!