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#1
The 3rd version in our latest series of Short Story Competitions is here!


I tried to give it a week or so since our last one in order to give everyone a bit of a breather so if you're new to the comp, or just need a refresher, here are the previous two for your perusal:




Firstly, even though we had more judges in the Beta competition, I want to go back to the first way we were doing the judging which is basically anyone who volunteers to judge can judge. Although, I want to add something to that by saying the winner of this competition will help to judge the next one.

Secondly, I have been trying to think of a good theme for this but I think I will just let the writers go wild on this one and do what they do sans theme. I dunno, maybe we will do a thing like every other competition has a theme or something. Just give me some feedback and let me know what ya think.

Thirdly
, I'm not going to place a maximum word limitation, but I think a minimum word limit of 50 words should suffice. The Six-word Short Stories can be found elsewhere y'all.

Finally, check back with the OP regularly for updates on who is judging as well as if we need to push the deadline back. I set the deadline at 6 weeks from today which should be a good amount of time to write something, polish it up, and submit it.

I would like to wish good luck to all contestants and say have fun with it, dont take yourself too seriously and, most of all, keep writing!



JUDGES


Pastafarian96

Kalibe



RULES

Rule #1. No Plaigirism

Rule #2. You cannot enter the short story contest if you have volunteered for judging, nor can you volunteer for judging if you have entered as a contestant.

Rule #3. Contestants must submit entries by MAY 11, 2015

Rule #4. No re-submitting entries. If you have already submitted an entry as part of the last comp, you cant use that same entry.

Rule #5. Minimum word limit of 50 words.


Previous Winners:


Weaponized
Duaneclapdrix



Harvedit:

While we are waiting for judging and submissions I would LOVE to hear suggestions on how we can improve future short story competitions or any ideas, themes, and basically anything anyone might think would be helpful!

I realize these competitions haven't been experiencing much upkeep lately, and i know Im not the best guy for the job but I genuinely think there is a lot of talent here and want to showcase it and keep these competitions going and keep us writing.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
Last edited by Harvey Swick at Apr 26, 2015,
#3
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#5
in for judging or as a contestant, Duane?
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#7
Check rule #2, Duane.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#9
Fair enough.

I'm going to try to keep an updated list of the judges in the OP but if we end up not having enough I suppose we can do the judging the way we did in the Beta contest.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#11
Quote by Gatecrasher53
just lettin yah know I'd like to write in the Shrot story competition


As we all know, the Shrot Story Competition is closed but you are welcome to enter in this one.


In reference to this thread whoever submits, submits. 'I not gonna make a list of Contestants because sometimes people drop out. Any Contestant who wants to enter should post their submission in the thread.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#13
Right, if you are writing, you cant judge.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#16
I said I was maybe going to do the last one and well this won't happen either but posting in case hypothetically maybe.
#17
very cool chaps, i do think i'd like to submit a tale.

as an aside, a UG chapbook would be right splendid if you ask me!
#18
Quote by floyd8888
very cool chaps, i do think i'd like to submit a tale.

as an aside, a UG chapbook would be right splendid if you ask me!

Tally Ho, what.

*puts pipe in mouth under brilliantly resplendent moustache*
#21
Harvedit:This is a true story of things that actually transpired. I have changed the names of those involved to protect their identities.

Here is my submission:

1
Ever since I was 10 years old I can remember wanting to get away from home. I stole my parents car the year I turned fourteen and, in the end, was officially missing for over a week. I finally moved out of my parents house at 18. Here nis the story, as best as I can tell, of the time I ran away. Here, I shall regale you with the tale of my stupidity.

It started with my mom's drinking problem. I was tired of having to deal with her and her ****ing antics as well as her stupid friends always at our house. At one particular party my uncle says to me, after I had gotten upset at my mom for the umpteenth time and had stormed out of the house, stewing on the front porch

"y'know as long as you live in her house you have to live by her rules"

so that got me thinking
"As long as i live in her house huh?..."

With that thought burning in my adolescent brain, I began planning on running away. I sold all my video games (which were the only things I had of any real value) that week and managed to get around $60.00 out of it. This wasn't nearly enough cash so I knew I had to get it from other sources. At great risk to my plan I opened up to a trusted few to join me on my excursion into the world. Two other friends ended up coming with me, who we will call Tony and Rich.

Rich had another 60.00 himself and Tony actually had a drivers permit and both were willing to join me which made them valuable assets. Tony did look a lot older than both of us so we thought it fitting that he be the driver. I was burdened with the title of navigator, and Rich was substitute driver, who would take over when Tony became too fatigued. We left after a week of my decision to leave.

Here was our inventory: 1 box of cereal, three packages of Ramen noodles, 120.00, one very sharp six inch knife (for defense), and our own individual bags of clothes and belongings. The night we left, I crept out of my house at 1:00 AM, taking the car keys off the dining room table, loaded up my stuff and drove away. From there I picked up my other two cohorts and we were on our way.

So we left with our 120.00 and got lost within a very short time on the road. We stayed lost for another 6 hours or so if I am guessing. We finally stopped at this out-of-the-way gas station, as we had been taking back roads and had agreed to stay off the interstate. Hoping they would have a map of some sort that we could buy (as we didn't have the sense to pack or buy any prior to leaving).
Luckily they had both maps and a working toilet (whew!) but we didnt stay at the gas station long. The station attendant was giving us weird looks and the place seemed really shady so we didn't bother to ask him for directions or where we were exactly. It kinda gave off this rapey vibe and seeing as we had no need to fill up the tank, we left. We continued to drive in the same direction which we could tell by the rising sun, was west. As we drove and the sun rose, we stopped at another gas station to ask directions.

We found out that we were still in Nebraska but had followed the northern border all the way west and we were now at the intersection of South Dakota, Wisconsin and Nebraska. Tony had been driving and Rich was sleeping so I woke up Rich, gave him basic instructions and showed him where we were on the map so he could drive while Tony and I slept. Using the map we figured out a route to keep us off the interstate. I remember that Rich would wake me up occasionally to confirm something on the map or ask me if he was taking the right exit.

I was jarred out of sleep by the car suddenly swinging it's back end to the right. As I was in the back seat, I took an abrupt trip to the opposite side of the car that I had been sleeping on. It turns out the car was too cold and Rich had been attempting to adjust the heat which caused us to slide into the ditch. The knob that controlled the heater snapped off in Rich's hand as we careened towards the ditch at over 60mph.


Luckily Rich managed to regain control of the vehicle in time to keep us from slipping over, but we continued to fishtail into the ditch. Once control could be maintained we all laughed nervously and drove out of the dusty ditch. The heater knob was the only thing that was damaged in the wreck, and we dealt with cold weather the rest of the trip.

We were moving north at this point, the plan being that we would meet up with Tony's girlfriend who was living in Lame Deer, Montana. She would give us more money and accompany us. So moving north and staying away from the interstate we managed to keep to small towns and back roads, which was both very interesting and very boring.

At this point we were having fun and we would often do dumb stunts like pull over and peel out to speed down the road like a action movie or something. We took our time and took 3 days to reach Montana and on the way there we even set a hay bale on fire! Like I said, dumb stunts. Once, a county sheriff did start following us for a bit which made us all very nervous and I think I gave the seat I was in a hickey. We saw a nondescript gravel road and pulled off to a stop behind a crop of pine trees and watched as the sheriff drove on his merry way (unbeknownst to me, my uncle who is a cop in South Dakota. had sent out an APB on the car we were driving and on all 3 of us.)

Once we crossed the state line into Montana is when things get a little more interesting. We bought a new, more detailed map so that we could find Tony's girlfriend. After Tony gave her a call. we arranged a pickup spot and got directions.
She actually lived in a town called Birney which we happened to be close to. We sped through the cold, October rain to get there and continued on our way, while simultaneously getting directions from Tony's girlfriend (cant remember her name, we will just call her..Helga) we made our way west to a town called Lame Deer which is where we were to meet her.

Helga was in Lame Deer with her cousin for the night (or maybe it was her friend) who, apparently, was to come with us as well. I was not too happy about this development, but, as long as they had money I didn't care. I figured I would be able to ditch them, by stealing all their money and taking the knife (which actually belonged to me anyway.)

We made it to Lame Deer and at this point, I should explain something before I continue. The time of year was mid-October, and the climate in Montana was just beginning to drop in temperature. At night it would get at least as low as (i'm judging by the frost on the ground) 30 degrees Fahrenheit. I had brought a lot of clothes with me and had, pulling into Lame Deer, donned every article of clothing I could, in order to stay warm. This makes sense if you remember that the heater was broken. The windows would fog so we couldn't see, and consequently drove most of the way with the windows down. Basically, we froze our asses off.

When we finally arrived in Lame deer we had been instructed to go to a bridge on the north end of town, and there, they would be waiting.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
Last edited by Harvey Swick at Apr 7, 2015,
#22
Harvedit: Formatting.

2
Upon arriving at the bridge, we found nothing. We parked in the parking lot of a motel nearby, where we could see the bridge and waited. We were all exhausted from the drive and we had all gotten very little sleep. After the whole swerving-into-the-ditch incident, we had someone stay awake to watch the driver. We soon fell asleep in the car while waiting. We awoke soon after dawn and decided to find a payphone to call Helga because Rich's phone had died and he had no car charger. Apparently we had simply fallen asleep at the wrong time and missed the meeting. Now, we had to travel to Birney. The problem was that Birney was so rural that it wasn't on the map and soon we were lost and running low on fuel.

we stopped at a farmhouse once we realized we were lost, Pulling into a long dirt/gravel driveway so that me and Rich could go investigate to ask directions. me and rich knocked on the door once. twice. thrice. and no answer was found.

Rich said

"I will go around the other side to see if i can get an answer there."

I waited at the front door in case the owners decided to show face. The white farmhouse had a huge, black number 3 painted above the door. While waiting for Rich I heard a noise. a distinct sound that signaled the start of a chainsaw. After a couple moments of panic, the noise stopped. Rich soon came running around the corner of the farmhouse, and grinning, he told me that he had gotten directions.

we found our way to where Birney was supposed to be on the map, but we only found a fork in the road. This was day five and we were down to about 10.00 in change. What money we had was used for gas so, we had little to eat except dry ramen noodles and dry cereal. With one package of ramens left and no cereal times were desperate.

We found our way to Birney, which turned out to be about 10 houses and a post office. Tony dropped off Rich and I in the middle of town to ask directions to the correct house. We knocked on a couple doors and found out we were in "white Birmey" which was part of a township that was segregated for the white people.

the first door that we knocked on turned out to be the door of a racist (surprised?) and he immediately told us that we needed to leave. After the door of that house slammed shut, we went to the next. Of course the owner of the previous house (the racist) comes out again to tell us that the house we are knocking on is the Sheriff's. Needless to say we made a hasty getaway. This gave us the answer as to which fork we were to take in order to get to "Indian Birney"

we arrived in "Indian" Birney and actually found the house we were looking for, after asking directions from some people throwing a football around (these folks were a lot more friendly than in "white" Birney) when we knocked on the front door (well, I, not we. We all drew straws to see who would go to the door. I lost.), I was greeted by who I, to this day, presume to be Helga's mother. It seems we had been given up and her parents knew about us leaving home and our intentions. The woman who answered the door chased us away by saying she had called the cops.

we high tailed it out of there on an alternate route, (we really didn't know where we were going, we just drove the opposite direction we came) driving for an hour or so, we ran out of gas. We had been traveling completely on dirt roads had passed only about three houses and accidentally almost driven down some guys driveway. The road forked and we took the wrong turned down the driveway, once we realized where we were going, we whipped around and managed to wreck the dudes mailbox.

So like i said we were out of ga,. stranded on a dirt road in rural montana, with only a vague sense of where exactly we were, with no money for food and no food/water sources available to us. We started to walk.

We made the mistake of forgetting to grab our ID's out of the car(my Tribal ID, Tony's License, and rich's Tribal ID were all in the car) but managed to grab the knife. Tony had a large bottle of some Creatin protein shake s**t which we emptied out and filled with water from a small fast-flowing creek that ran alongside the road we were traveling(eww).
We traveled the rest of that day on foot, for several hours (4-5 if you really want to know) dodging cars when we heard them approach. Though only a few passed by, two cars and a fat guy on a four-wheeler/ATV.

we stopped for a "lunch break" once. We ate some pre-packaged cheddar cheese crackers and the last package of ramen noodles which we broke into thirds and ate dry. We all slept on top of a hill that night, wearing every stitch of clothing we owned and covered ourselves with the bags we had previously carried those clothes in. When I woke up at dawn I was freezing my ass off but I was alive. Looking out from the top of the hill I could see the peaks of other adjacent hilltops, each surrounded by what seemed to be a sea of early morning fog. I felt free.

We continued to walk that next day and started early. We really didn't know how far from Lame Deer we were, but Tony kept insisting that it was

"right around the next corner!"

We walked uneventfully until a car finally stopped (right on the outskirts of town, we only would have had to walk another fifteen minutes) and picked us up. Once in the car, I rode in the back with Rich, while Tony rode up front with the driver(who was actually a nice guy). Rich decided to take a fake plastic gun out of the back of the guys car (he must have had kids because there was a car seat too) which looked realistic enough and didn't even have a little red cap on the end. The guy drops us off near the border of town and from there we made our way to the nearest gas station.

The sight of us to the locals must have been hilarious or scary or both. Three strange teenagers walking on the main road through town, wearing every piece of clothing we own, not having washed in a week, each carrying a backpack. When we made it to the gas station (Sinclair) we counted out our money, since all we had was change, it added up about $5.00. We were all wearing a large amount of clothing and so we figured we could steal some food from the gas station and steal another car once night fell.Tony and I entered the gas station with the intent of spending our five dollars and stealing some food. We left Rich outside with the bags which had some valuables in them along with the 6 inch knife and plastic gun.

The gas station was about 25 feet by 25 feet which is very small. three aisles running horizontal to the north door and a southern door on the opposite side of the aisles were the only significant features. After being in the place for maybe a minute I looked up to see a police officer walking towards me.
The cop said

"Hands behind your back."

and when I asked him what for he only replied with

"How was the trip from Nebraska?"

Tony, Rich and I was arrested and spent the next three weeks in a Montana juvenile detention facility. I was transferred to Nebraska after that time and subjected to juvenile imprisonment there for over 9 months. I spent the rest of my juvenile years in and out of court under probation, and doing community service until I was 18.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
Last edited by Harvey Swick at Apr 7, 2015,
#24
c'mon guys, we need more judges...
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#25
Eh what the hell

Here's my sub


Trapped Under Ice


God, please help me! The ice! The ****ing ice! Frozen to the core, unable to move. I don't want to die here. I.. I can see him. Staring at me. Waiting. The louder I scream, the louder he laughs. There's no hope, is there? They're going to leave me here. My god.. do they even know?! Can't one of their machines tell them I'm awake? I need to get out. I need to break free. Don't.. don't let him take me.
Fucking hell! Please?! Anyone?! I'm alive! Help me! Get me out of here! I.. I can't move! There's no escape, is there? HEY! YOU! I SEE YOU! I FUCKING SEE YOU! LOOK AT ME! FUCKING LOOK AT ME! LET ME OUT! Jesus, they can't hear me, can they?
What if I can't get out? What if I'm stuck here forever? God. I can feel it, clenched around me. Its cold, icy fingers wrapped around me. Around my very soul. The hand of Doom. Holding me down for him. No. I. I can't. I don't want to die! I can't take this. The waiting. Stuck here, waiting for Death to claim me.
How? How is a man supposed to live through this hell? Motionless. Mute. Starting into the eyes of Death himself for god knows how long. It's enough to drive one to madness.
If. If I could just get their attention. Then they'd know I was awake. Right? Then... Then they'd let me out! Yeah, they'd let me out, and I'd be free. Free to live my life. But how? If I can't move and they can't hear me, how can I get their attention? FUCKING HELL! Come on! Think!
Eyes! My eyes! If I move them when they come to check on me, they'll see I'm alive! God, I'm brilliant! But when will they come? They have to check on me at least once a day, right? Have they come today? What time is it? What DAY is it? Jesus, how long will I have to wait? What if.. What if they don't check daily? What if it's weekly? Or monthly? How long has it been since they checked on me? There's no way to keep track of time in this crystallized prison. I guess I'll just have to wait.
It feels like I've been here for an eternity. Left here, staring at the frost covered glass in front of me. I can barely make anything out through it. God I hope they come soon. I can't wait to be let out.
I wonder. What will it be like? All I've ever known is the brief life I've spent locked in here. What's it like out there? What if it's no better than it is in here? I mean, at least I'm safe in here. I've no idea how to live. What to do with myself or where to go. I could stay in here. At least I know what to expect. But I'm not free. When it boils down to it, that's what it's all about, isn't it? Being able to do what you want, when you want. I don't have that here. No matter what the world holds, anything is better than sitting here, looking into the glassy eyes of Death himself. No, I'm doing it. No doubt about it. I have to get out of here. If they see I'm awake, they'll let me go. I know it.
But what if they don't? What if they see I'm awake, and ignore me? God, what if I'm left like this forever. What if they don't care? Or worse, what if they take this from me. I mean, it's better to be trapped here alive than to go back into the cold, black abyss. ...Or is it? Maybe it's better if they just simply put me back to sleep... Forever. I mean, what do I know about life anyway? It's not like I'd know the difference. I'd simply fade into the black with no recollection of this brief bout of consciousness. It would be like I never woke up in the first place. Nothing will change. Everything will go on as it always has, and always will. The world won't stop just because I'm not here to see it.
No. No I can't do that. I won't do that. I'm alive god dammit, and I intend to stay that way. I don't know what's out there, beyond this glass, but I want to see it. I'm getting out of here. I just need them to see I'm awake. They'll let me go, and I'll start my life! I can't wait! I've no clue where I'm going, but it's far away from here, I can tell you that!
Is that? It is! Someone's out there! Oh my god, this is my chance! Come on! See me! I'm alive! I know you can't hear me, but I'm alive! Look at me! Please?! God dammit, it's no use. They'll never notice.
Wait... He's coming back! He's right here! Help! Please! Get me out of here! He saw me! I did it! Jesus Christ he saw me! His eyes got wide and his jaw dropped! Then he ran off to his machine! This is it! I'm finally free!
The glass! It's moving! My god they've opened my cell up. I see them! Men in white coats, all looking at me! I can feel myself warming up! Arms! I have arms! I can feel them! I can almost move them! Thank god I'm out! I can't wait to thank these men for letting me go! How can you even begin to thank someone for giving you life?!
Wait.. What.. What are they doing?! No! Please god no! Get off of me! What's.. What's in that needle! Jesus fucking Christ no! Please god don't do this. No! Let me go! Please! What are you doing to me?! I don't want to go back in there! Please don't put me back to sleep! Please don't! Let me live! Fuck that hurts! Christ almighty no! Don't make me go! I.. I don't... P.. Please.. I just want.. To be fr...


Shit
Edit'd the profanity to make it readable
Last edited by darkwolf291 at Apr 7, 2015,
#26
Quote by floyd8888
very cool chaps, i do think i'd like to submit a tale.

as an aside, a UG chapbook would be right splendid if you ask me!

Actually, a collection of the best works from the competitions would be bitchin'
Like the UG albums
With a special section for the winners of the competitions
#27
Quote by darkwolf291
Actually, a collection of the best works from the competitions would be bitchin'

That WOULD be pretty cool.

Quote by darkwolf291
Like the UG albums
With a special section for the winners of the competitions

Im not sure I understand this part though.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#28
Quote by Harvey Swick
That WOULD be pretty cool.


Im not sure I understand this part though.

Put it together as an E-book for free download, with a special section containing the winners of the competitions

That way, whomever is in the book can have an actual publication on their resume should they decide to try and forge a career
Last edited by darkwolf291 at Apr 7, 2015,
#29
There once was a man from Peru

who dreamed he was eating a shoe

he awoke with a fright

in the middle of the night

to find that his dream had come true



sorry gary

that was my entry btw
Eat your pheasant
Drink your wine
Your days are numbered, bourgeois swine!
Last edited by Bladez22 at Apr 7, 2015,
#30
Quote by darkwolf291
Put it together as an E-book for free download, with a special section containing the winners of the competition


yeah, that sounds awesome, actually. Im not sure Im qualified to do something like that though
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#32
those are some good ideas. Would we just want to do the most recent string of Short Story Comps, or go back further as well?
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#33
^ just this one I think, but that's just, like, my opinion man...

Quote by Bladez22
There once was a man from Peru

who dreamed he was eating a shoe

he awoke with a fright

in the middle of the night

to find that his dream had come true



sorry gary

that was my entry btw


Someone once wrote a limerick,
but some thought it a gimmick
made of five lines
some of which rhymed
but still a totally useless finick
Last edited by Pastafarian96 at Apr 7, 2015,
#35
Quote by darkwolf291
Whichever really. We can keep it recent, or go as far back as we can. I'd make sure we have each author's permission first though.
Just to be on the safe side.

Call it like, "Tales From the Pit: A UG Literary Magazine"


It would be harder to get permission from the authors the further back we go, but that would be nice. I like this idea though. Lets see if we can make it happen.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#36
That's the main issue with going back, aye.
Inactive users that we aren't able to get in contact with.

But still worth a shot.

We can do it one of two ways.
Hold a public multi-choice vote and have the UG public vote for what they believe are the best stories for the first issue, then publish UG's favorite stories every competition.

Or simply publish every contestant's story every competition.

Expanding on the second part, we could always accept "x" amount of submissions for those who have stories longer than the maximum word limit, don't fit the theme, ect. just to give some UG authors a place to get their works read.
#37
Quote by darkwolf291
Call it like, "Tales From the Pit: A UG Literary Magazine"

wouldn't "tales from beyond the pit" make more sense? if we called it the former, would it not just be a bunch of the more interesting encounters in the everyday workings of the pit.

Call it whatever you want, I'm just in a questioning and disagreeable mood.
#38
Quote by Pastafarian96
wouldn't "tales from beyond the pit" make more sense? if we called it the former, would it not just be a bunch of the more interesting encounters in the everyday workings of the pit.

Call it whatever you want, I'm just in a questioning and disagreeable mood.

Touche
#39
I have exams/deadlines for Uni around May, I'd really love to take part but I just can't

if this was during the summer / June I'd love it
Eat your pheasant
Drink your wine
Your days are numbered, bourgeois swine!
#40
Quote by darkwolf291
That's the main issue with going back, aye.
Inactive users that we aren't able to get in contact with.

But still worth a shot.


Definitely still worth a shot.

Quote by darkwolf291
We can do it one of two ways.
Hold a public multi-choice vote and have the UG public vote for what they believe are the best stories for the first issue, then publish UG's favorite stories every competition.

Or simply publish every contestant's story every competition.

Expanding on the second part, we could always accept "x" amount of submissions for those who have stories longer than the maximum word limit, don't fit the theme, ect. just to give some UG authors a place to get their works read.


I like both of these ideas but I know for a fact I personally wont have the time or energy to set this up and maintain it, though I really, really like this and would love to see it get done. If anyone else feels up to the task I will certainly help and support in any capacity that I can.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
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