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#1
Friends, are you tired of countries that all offer the same promises? Lower taxes, better education, a free unicorn with every citizenship? Do you want a country with the guts to be honest to you? Then friends, you may have a new home country; Freedonia, the Land of the Brave, and Free!



Do you hate taxes? So do we, which is why Freedonia doesn't have any, because we don't have any centralized government. As a micronation, we subsist on the land of larger nations, and therefore the need to tax citizens for things such as roads, peacekeeping, homeland security, etc., is nonexistent. Who needs an army when you can hide behind America's wall of nukes? We don't have better education, but unlike those pansy-ass other countries, we have the balls to tell you outright. Besides, you won't care about education when you receive your free Freedonian-raised unicorn* upon your naturalization! Do you need a leader you can believe in? Someone you know won't bullshit you? Well too bad, because our supreme leader is the apathetic ghost of revered comedy legend Groucho Marx!



So come to Freedonia! The land of the Brave, and Free! We don't have education, but you know what else we don't have? Taxes. And you know what we do have? Groucho Marx and unicorns*.

*Freedonia reserves the right to substitute actual unicorns with 3" plastic toy unicorns due to unicorn availability
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Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
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2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#3
Quote by soundgarden1986
if the nations animal isnt super chris davis im OUT.


Superdavis is not an animal and treating him as such would be against Freedonia's laws. He is however the entirety of our national police force, because nobody messes with Superdavis.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#5
Can I chose which unicorn I get?
Eat your pheasant
Drink your wine
Your days are numbered, bourgeois swine!
#6
we should legit let the weird far right have their own microstate with semi-recognition from the rest of the world so they'll leave everyone else alone.
#7
you know nevermind **** this (not that I was ever for it). it's gonna be an exclusive club for billionaires, not a real country (obviously). it's founder is a self-declared "libertarian" who says he's doing it just to prove that "liberal economics" works (of course it does when it's a billionaire club conveniently importing everything lol). 300,000 people applied, 80 of which were billionaires. who's going to get accepted and what's the real goal? lol. the Vatican deserves more respect as a "country" than this.

if the Six Nations Reserve or something was like **** you and declared independence that is something I could back. or if it was founded by people who actually live in the disputed land (for example if the Nubians, Egyptians, and Sudanese in that one disputed area turned it into their own country- giving modern Nubians a state and somewhere for the "in between" people, and let's say they took in stateless immigrants too which would be cool- that's something I could back. plus it's a legit marginalised area so if they want to allow billionaires to put money in their banks I can't be mad at them as long as they don't let the billionaires dictate everything. >_>

edit: WRONG THREAD lol this was meant to go in the liberland thread.
#8
**** yeah, Groucho Marx trumps whatever liberland can offer
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#9
Quote by Bladez22
Can I chose which unicorn I get?


Only if you're willing to provide money until we birth a unicorn you deem acceptable, or, in the absence of actual unicorns, find a store with the plastic one you want.

Quote by slipknot5678
you know nevermind **** this (not that I was ever for it). it's gonna be an exclusive club for billionaires, not a real country (obviously). it's founder is a self-declared "libertarian" who says he's doing it just to prove that "liberal economics" works (of course it does when it's a billionaire club conveniently importing everything lol). 300,000 people applied, 80 of which were billionaires. who's going to get accepted and what's the real goal? lol. the Vatican deserves more respect as a "country" than this.

if the Six Nations Reserve or something was like **** you and declared independence that is something I could back. or if it was founded by people who actually live in the disputed land (for example if the Nubians, Egyptians, and Sudanese in that one disputed area turned it into their own country- giving modern Nubians a state and somewhere for the "in between" people, and let's say they took in stateless immigrants too which would be cool- that's something I could back. plus it's a legit marginalised area so if they want to allow billionaires to put money in their banks I can't be mad at them as long as they don't let the billionaires dictate everything. >_>

edit: WRONG THREAD lol this was meant to go in the liberland thread.


Clearly this is a sign that you should be a Freedonian.

Edit:

Quote by Pastafarian96
**** yeah, Groucho Marx trumps whatever liberland can offer


You are officially the national treasurer for your display of impeccable logic and reasoning.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#10
Quote by necrosis1193
You are officially the national treasurer for your display of impeccable logic and reasoning.

Alright, I can math. I can also listen to people complaining.

I think I might be overqualified.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#11
Quote by Pastafarian96
Alright, I can math. I can also listen to people complaining.

I think I might be overqualified.


Don't worry, with our lack of a formal educational system, you'll forget one of those by the 33rd of the month!
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#13
No, but there is Febtober. Then again, I suppose if we put it to a vote and a majority of the two citizens vote yay, then we could add Augcember.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#15
Quote by necrosis1193
No, but there is Febtober. Then again, I suppose if we put it to a vote and a majority of the two citizens vote yay, then we could add Augcember.

yes, but did you see the Christmas shopping? I truly must ask this part.

anyway, are there any interesting dates in Febtober?
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#16
Quote by Pastafarian96
yes, but did you see the Christmas shopping? I truly must ask this part.

anyway, are there any interesting dates in Febtober?


We don't have Christmas in Freedonia, it's replaced with the Celebration of the Stache, a month-long celebration in Smarch where all citizens - men and women - grow glorious moustaches in honor of our glorious undead leader. Presents are daily.

Febtober consists of the annual Bludgeoning of the Trees, where every citizen goes to the tallest, thickest, strongest tree in a five mile radius and smacks it repeatedly with a baseball bat. Metal bats are preferred since dents can be repaired and wooden bats tend to break. This is considered a feat of strength meant to allow our children to become strong and powerful like Superdavis. There is also the Annual Unicorn Harvest, where we pray to Lord Harp, brother of Groucho, to give us a plentiful bounty of unicorns this year in order to attract new citizens. Unfortunately, Lord Harp doesn't answer very often.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#17
Quote by necrosis1193
We don't have Christmas in Freedonia, it's replaced with the Celebration of the Stache, a month-long celebration in Smarch where all citizens - men and women - grow glorious moustaches in honor of our glorious undead leader. Presents are daily.

Febtober consists of the annual Bludgeoning of the Trees, where every citizen goes to the tallest, thickest, strongest tree in a five mile radius and smacks it repeatedly with a baseball bat. Metal bats are preferred since dents can be repaired and wooden bats tend to break. This is considered a feat of strength meant to allow our children to become strong and powerful like Superdavis. There is also the Annual Unicorn Harvest, where we pray to Lord Harp, brother of Groucho, to give us a plentiful bounty of unicorns this year in order to attract new citizens. Unfortunately, Lord Harp doesn't answer very often.

I swear to you the treasury will be in good hands, free from corruption.

This bludgeoning if the trees business though, do we all attack the one tree or all find our own?
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#18
worker co-op based socialist democracy, yes? no co-op allowed over a certain size so no oligarchies or cartels forming.

or

anarcho-libertarian society where everyone does whatever but are all self-motivated enough to just take care of stuff that needs doing for the pure joy of hard work.
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#19
Quote by Pastafarian96
I swear to you the treasury will be in good hands, free from corruption.

This bludgeoning if the trees business though, do we all attack the one tree or all find our own?


I knew I placed our finances in good hands

Preferably each individual attacks their own trees, though in sparsely forested areas, a group may take turns bludgeoning a single tree, so long as they target different spots. Also, families may bludgeon together.

Quote by theguitarist
worker co-op based socialist democracy, yes? no co-op allowed over a certain size so no oligarchies or cartels forming.

or

anarcho-libertarian society where everyone does whatever but are all self-motivated enough to just take care of stuff that needs doing for the pure joy of hard work.


Quote by necrosis1193
we don't have any centralized government.


Whichever one makes more sense with that.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
#20
Quote by necrosis1193
Do you hate texas? So do we


Quote by necrosis1193
So come to Freedonia! The land of the Brave, and Free! We don't have education, but you know what else we don't have? Texas.


I'm in!
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
Sadly this is Ultimate-guitar, not Simple-guitar. We can't help you.


#21
I don't know...I'm inclined to side with Texas if it's between that and shitty ass MD.

...modes and scales are still useless.


Quote by PhoenixGRM
Hey guys could you spare a minute to Vote for my band. Go to the site Search our band Listana with CTRL+F for quick and vote Thank you .
Quote by sam b
Voted for Patron Çıldırdı.

Thanks
Quote by PhoenixGRM
But our Band is Listana
#23
Quote by necrosis1193
I knew I placed our finances in good hands

Preferably each individual attacks their own trees, though in sparsely forested areas, a group may take turns bludgeoning a single tree, so long as they target different spots. Also, families may bludgeon together.


Whichever one makes more sense with that.



anarcho-libertarinism.
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#25
Quote by theguitarist
anarcho-libertarinism.

The Freedonian Treasury supports this movement of governmental ideology.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#26
HAIL, HAIL FREEDONIA



[ Fanfare ]



HAIL, HAIL FREEDONIA



LAND OF THE BRAVE



AND FREE



[ Fanfare ]






HAIL, HAIL FREEDONIA



LAND OF THE BRAVE

AND FREE


[ Alarm ]



HAIL, HAIL FREEDONIA






LAND OF THE BRAVE

AND FREE


YOU EXPECTING SOMEBODY ?

YES.


HAIL, HAIL FREEDONIA


LAND OF THE BRAVE

AND FREE
#27
hello just wondering where is the land the Freedonia occupies?
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#28
Quote by Baby Joel
hello just wondering where is the land the Freedonia occupies?



put your hand on your chest.

right there
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#29
Quote by theguitarist
put your hand on your chest.

right there


Ooooh. So NOW the government is surveying my heart too!?!

THIS OPPRESSION WILL NOT STAND! FREEDONIA IS NOT FREE!
#DontTreadOnMe #bigbrotheriswatching
Seattle Seahawks


Quote by chookiecookie
i feel like you have an obsession with aubrey plaza.


Quote by WCPhils
at least we can all agree SGstriker is the woooooooooooooooooooooorst
#30
Quote by SGstriker
Ooooh. So NOW the government is surveying my heart too!?!

THIS OPPRESSION WILL NOT STAND! FREEDONIA IS NOT FREE!
#DontTreadOnMe #bigbrotheriswatching



brother, it sounds like oppression has penetrated your heart and occupies you very being.

you can only be happy in a free land when you are free within yourself.
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#32
groucho marx is dead and unicorns aren't real.

Quote by Tanglewoodguit
Is gay marriage legal?

gay marriage doesn't exist lol
#33
Quote by Tanglewoodguit
Is gay marriage legal?

why not?

Quote by SGstriker
Ooooh. So NOW the government is surveying my heart too!?!

THIS OPPRESSION WILL NOT STAND! FREEDONIA IS NOT FREE!
#DontTreadOnMe #bigbrotheriswatching

The Freedonian Government would like to issue an apology (at this time) for any confusion caused. We don't monitor your physical heart, but we monitor how you feel in your heart. Feeling down? We'll come to your house and make you hot cocoa and listen to your stories of your horrible day. Getting married? We'll help you write out the invites and give you advice on the latest trends.

Freedonia, helping you with your day since 1933.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
Last edited by Pastafarian96 at May 6, 2015,
#34
Quote by chaoticfables

gay marriage doesn't exist lol



I'd assume sexuality, gender and marital contracts don't exist here. All oppressive systems.
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#35
Quote by theguitarist
I'd assume sexuality, gender and marital contracts don't exist here. All oppressive systems.

systems in general are problematic. Will Freedonia have systems?
#38
Quote by theguitarist
put your hand on your chest.

right there

:')
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#39
How will you handle crime? Because I would like to conduct some crime in Freedonia.
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