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#1
so i recently got to know this very screwed up guy that lives very close to me. he frequents the gas station i work at and we started talking because i knew his face. turns out he's my cousins half brother that i met once like 10 years ago. he'd also sold me weed on one occasion
so we start talking, he seems like a pretty cool guy. so he invites me to his house to smoke with him and that's when i start smelling the fishes. we have a sit down to smoke and talk and he tells me about all these crazy nonsense patterns he kept seeing since eating far too many shrooms like 3 years ago, real delusional stuff. i was really quite freaked out as i have no idea how to respond, so i would just agree with him on his babble, like yeah totally dude, exactly. then i got the **** out of there as quick as possible.

anyway this guy has been plaguing me recently and calls me every day. he's very lonely and has no friends. so ive tried to be friends with him and hung out with him a bit and invited him to a 3 day lan session we were having at my friends place this weekend. this is where we all learned that he was indeed a total dickhead as well. basically he totally ruined the whole thing.
honestly his strange demeanor goes far beyond my understanding of human psychology so i shan't keep babbling on about things i know nothing about. basically the guy is a nutjob, wont stop calling me and even if i switched my number he knows where i work and where i live and where i like to hang out. i can not stand him. i have to get rid of him. halp
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#2
Quote by Burgery
turns out he's my cousins half brother

****s sake, there goes my Iceland joke I was going to make
#3
My dad and I used to be in a band but my dad didn't like what our drummer wanted to play so he stopped talking to him entirely and his phone would always go off and get texts like wtf dude? and such but eventually he stopped so maybe do that?
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#4
he knows where i work, where i live and where i like to hang out. i already dont answer 70% of his incessant calls but he just keeps calling. pretty everytime i answer i turn him down, nah i dont wanna maybe later bai but he will not get the hint
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#5
Quote by Joshua Garcia
My dad and I used to be in a band

hahahahaha
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#6
Ignoring's the best route, not even a 'nah can't lol' text or anything. Just dont answer or anything and give it a month


If that doesnt work, and he still doesnt get it, honesty might be the best policy (with a bit of tact to kill em softly)


Flat out ignoring and nonresponse is best for the 'possibly crazy' type, though...heheheheehehehe
.
#7
Invite him out with you and your squad then ditch him miles away from his home. Apparently that works.
The plan was to drink until the pain over.
But what's worse, the pain or the hangover?
Who am I? I'm a titan so be expectin' a clash.
#8
Quote by Burgery
he knows where i work, where i live and where i like to hang out. i already dont answer 70% of his incessant calls but he just keeps calling. pretty everytime i answer i turn him down, nah i dont wanna maybe later bai but he will not get the hint
Call the cops on him under suspicion of drugs.

Quote by ErikLensherr
hahahahaha
I know, I know. :/
He needed a bassist though and I had never tried it, so I thought it might be fun.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
Last edited by Joshua Garcia at May 24, 2015,
#9
Quote by Joshua Garcia
My dad and I used to be in a band but my dad didn't like what our drummer wanted to play so he stopped talking to him entirely and his phone would always go off and get texts like wtf dude? and such but eventually he stopped so maybe do that?


or yo ucould not be a total pussy and fade him like a total pussy

sack up and tell him some fkn truth
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#10
might i mention that i have a strong suspicion that this guy may be a tad bit psychotic and unpredictable
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#11
Quote by Acϵ♠
or yo ucould not be a total pussy and fade him like a total pussy

sack up and tell him some fkn truth


this might not be the best Plan A with crazy, though... unless youre packing a tazer
.
#12
Quote by Acϵ♠
or yo ucould not be a total pussy and fade him like a total pussy

sack up and tell him some fkn truth
It wasn't a cowardice act. It was pretty much him just saying I don't give a crap anymore.

Personally, I often told him I wasn't on board with his decision. But to be fair, the drummer did have anger issues, so it wasn't going to be pretty any way you slice it.

Besides, they've had that discussion a million times already and it always lead to an argument followed by us just leaving only to come back a few days later and try again.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
Last edited by Joshua Garcia at May 24, 2015,
#13
I want a 3 day Ian session.

Also, "smelling the fishes" teehee
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#14
Quote by Burgery
might i mention that i have a strong suspicion that this guy may be a tad bit psychotic and unpredictable


...so? You can either hope he goes away like a chicken shit, or you can be proactive and make him go away. If he comes around your place uninvited, file a report. He does it again, after this report, you get a restraining order. If he does it again still, he gets arrested.

lol man nobody's gonna do the dirty work for you. like i said you can either sack up and deal with it properly or don't and he'll never go away. life gave you a lemon, big deal, squeeze the juice in its eyes.
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#15
Murder him, bury the body in deep woodland
Problem solved.

OR

Move somewhere like Antarctica where he can't really get hold of you
I have nothing important to say
#16
Quote by Acϵ♠
...so? You can either hope he goes away like a chicken shit, or you can be proactive and make him go away. If he comes around your place uninvited, file a report. He does it again, after this report, you get a restraining order. If he does it again still, he gets arrested.

lol man nobody's gonna do the dirty work for you. like i said you can either sack up and deal with it properly or don't and he'll never go away. life gave you a lemon, big deal, squeeze the juice in its eyes.

but feelings
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#17
you're actually afraid of hurting his feelings? you're gonna put his feelings before your sanity?
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#18
Quote by Acϵ♠
you're actually afraid of hurting his feelings? you're gonna put his feelings before your sanity?

idk man, feelings are some serious shit. this guy is batshit insane and i dont think he likes being rejected
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#19
ok then enjoy your shitty life with his shitty face popping up in it when you dont want it to.
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#20
the trick is to get him to break up with you
Eat your pheasant
Drink your wine
Your days are numbered, bourgeois swine!
#21
Quote by Acϵ♠
ok then enjoy your shitty life with his shitty face popping up in it when you dont want it to.


+1


What did he do at the LAN party that made you guys think he was psycho? Honestly, you've gotta weigh pros and cons.... dont hurt his feelings : you bare the burden
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#22
Quote by Acϵ♠
ok then enjoy your shitty life with his shitty face popping up in it when you dont want it to.

wow ok

also *don't :upto:
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#23
Quote by Acϵ♠
ok then enjoy your shitty life with his shitty face popping up in it when you dont want it to.

thanks for your advice
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#24
Ignore his calls and if he harasses you at work or whatevs


Quote by Acϵ♠
...so? You can either hope he goes away like a chicken shit, or you can be proactive and make him go away. If he comes around your place uninvited, file a report. He does it again, after this report, you get a restraining order. If he does it again still, he gets arrested.

lol man nobody's gonna do the dirty work for you. like i said you can either sack up and deal with it properly or don't and he'll never go away. life gave you a lemon, big deal, squeeze the juice in its eyes.

Listen to this man.
#25
He's just a guy, why are you scared. It's not like he asked if you go to Penn State and then held your hand without consent.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#26
Me: *offers solution*

Burg: but i dont wanna

Me: but you have to, sometimes you have to do things you don't want

Burg: but i still dont wanna


K.
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#27
look to see if Friendzone is auditioning in Iceland soon and invite him to be on it with you.


Or meet crazy with crazy to the 5th power. Make him leave you.
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#28
Quote by Acϵ♠
Me: *offers solution*

Burg: but i dont wanna

Me: but you have to, sometimes you have to do things you don't want

Burg: but i still dont wanna


K.

your advice has been duly noted
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#29
if by "duly noted" you mean "mostly disregarded" then yeah that's what it looks like
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#30
he could have duly disregarded it. Or mostly noted.
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#31
You could just start talking about how much you love the weiner next time he comes around. Seriously, just talk about weiner a lot, and let that be the only thing you talk when he's around. That should get him to go away. If that doesn't work, well, you might find yourself in an even more awkward situation. To get someone to go away, all you have to do is become the person that they don't want to be around.
Gear: Gibson Les Paul Studio, Gibson SG Special, Fender Stratocaster, Fender Telecaster, Fender Jazzmaster, Gretsch Pro Jet, Carvin C350, Epiphone ES-339 P90, Epiphone ES-335 Pro. Peavey 6505, Sovtek MIG-100, Vox AC30, Peavey XXX.
#32
Quote by ThunderPunk
You could just start talking about how much you love the weiner next time he comes around. Seriously, just talk about weiner a lot, and let that be the only thing you talk when he's around. That should get him to go away. If that doesn't work, well, you might find yourself in an even more awkward situation. To get someone to go away, all you have to do is become the person that they don't want to be around.

wow what an idea
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#33
Quote by Baby Joel
wow what an idea

worked for me. be the most unbearable cunt you can to the already unbearable cunt.

if it doesn't work after a week, restraining order or some such.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#34
but but but feelings guis
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#35
Quote by Pastafarian96
worked for me. be the most unbearable cunt you can to the already unbearable cunt.

if it doesn't work after a week, restraining order or some such.

I don't think you can get a restraining order on your neighbour just because he calls you a lot
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#36
you didnt duly note my inquiry as to what he did at the LAN party Berg, wtf? How you gonna not huu with the details on why he's crazy??


pls respond ;_;
.
#37
Quote by Acϵ♠
but but but feelings guis


are you gonna cry
i don't know why i feel so dry
#38
he was only following orders
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#39
Quote by Acϵ♠
but but but feelings guis


Well, I guess he doesn't need to be a jerk if he is worried about hurting feelings. He could pretend that he converted to Mormonism. That usually scares people away pretty quickly.
Gear: Gibson Les Paul Studio, Gibson SG Special, Fender Stratocaster, Fender Telecaster, Fender Jazzmaster, Gretsch Pro Jet, Carvin C350, Epiphone ES-339 P90, Epiphone ES-335 Pro. Peavey 6505, Sovtek MIG-100, Vox AC30, Peavey XXX.
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