#3
Hey,

Thanks for sharing these tracks with us.

Break For Liberty has a very open arrangement. I think this can be a strength or a weakness. There are tons of cool ideas in here, but I feel like sometimes they aren't given a chance to develop before transitioning to the next section (especially closer to the beginning of the song... the latter half felt more structured). I struggle a lot with song structure. It's also hard to identify the focal point at certain times. What seems to be the 'background'sometimes competes for my attention. This can be an interesting device and surprise the listener if used a little more sparingly. I really enjoyed your guitar leads. I think this track could be balanced out a little more with a solid bassline.

Here are some specific moments which caught my attention:

0:40 I dig the tremolo riff here.
0:52 There's a really loud 'feedback' sustained noise here, it's a little distracting. The rhythm and lead lines immediately following this time point seem to be competing.
3:00-3:30 This section felt very cohesive. The lead tone here sounds great and balanced here.
4:17 I really dig this part, there's some neat technical, funky riffing going on.


I also checked out "awkwardly unpleasant"

There are definitely some good ideas in here. The drums can use some variation though (I know you indicated these are just drum loops). I do the same thing when I'm writing riffs. I usually start with a simple beat until I have the guitar parts worked out.

Could you please check out my track? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1679635
Last edited by silvadolla at Jun 20, 2015,
#4
cool ideas. definitely needs more focus (sometimes a lot of the ideas kinda contrast so maybe try and pick a few things that work and stick with that) sick solo though (very opeth!)

liked the ambient background noise - maybe try and blend that better into teh metal riffages (volume swells ++ layers). like, fading in the tremelo stuff n stuff.
also, a lot of the technical riffages (not the solos) tend to work better working with the drums as apposed to over generic loops.

i think 2:30 is a really great place to build to. definitely keep that riff. and the 16th note riff is a great motif/rhythm line. the palm muted variation is good too. some stuff here that could eventually develop into a great song man!
by the way, i stole this riff.