Poll: How would you survive
Poll Options
View poll results: How would you survive
By living in a safe house
6 43%
By going on a boat
3 21%
By living in the caribbeans
1 7%
By walking around pretending to be a zombie
0 0%
By living in the streets like a bada$$ with only a shotgun
1 7%
By living on a plane
0 0%
by living in a car/bus/lorry
0 0%
By running at the zombies yelling I'm Rick Grimes!
2 14%
By letting a zombie bite you thinking your the oracle
0 0%
or by huddling in the corner and crying
1 7%
Voters: 14.
#1
If you had to survive a zombie apocalypse what would you do heres a tip from dr dales zombie dictionary.

News

"Welcome back to the most cutting edge news show on the tv at the moment. I'm bob gold and today I will be talking with various undead experts about the apparent rise of the undead, but first this live report from Cynthia, who's on the spot at a local hospital. Cynthia? "

"Thanks Bob! despite the information we received from the most esteemed experts on the walking dead, here I am right on the edge of danger, ready to pick up multiple awards for my truthful, honest and daring news reporting tactics in a hospital which is currently being overrun by zombies Look! There! A small child crying alone in the corner right where I placed him earlier. If that's not thought-provoking then reporting I don't know what it is. Back to you."

"Thanks, Cynthia, we'll be back with you later but first here's Graham with a large 3D graph."

"Thanks, bob I also have a 3D chart too and a map of the world with big red dots on it."

"Insightful. What does it mean?"

"That we used up a fair whack of our yearly budget on pointless effects that have required for us to lay of some of our cleaning staff."

"But our viewers must see the truth in computer generated graphics otherwise it won't make sense."

"Absolutely - back to you bob."

"Thanks, Graham, now back to cynthia at the local hospital to see how things are progressing."

"Oh god... Oh god... They're... They're all dead and they're coming back to life! One of them's attacking the camera guy! You've got to get me out of here! Oh no! Get them away from me! I'm going to die! help bob!"

"Cynthia's going to die, you heard it here first and if that's not cutting edge I don't know what is. In a moment we'll be getting views on the escalated rise of the undead from the minister of bread, the outraged leader of a minority group and Sandi Toksvig but first, the weather."

"In 3D Bob."

"Yes, in 3D."



The moral of this tale is not to go to a hospital on the zombie outbreak fine then do it but bring a gun to shoot some zombie a$$ ok fine then don't be bob.
#5
Quote by Deliriumbassist
Are zombie apocalypses really still a thing?

We haven't had one round our neck of the woods for a couple of years.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#6
pvp in cherno


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo
#7
Poll has way too many options

I'd basically try and live as isolated as I could out in a cave in the wilderness somewhere and just survive until most people are dead. Then see how I fare against the rest of whoever's alive, if I could find a half decent group of people like some kind of colony I would try and join since there's always strength in numbers. Though romantically I like the idea of just lone wolfing it.

Realistically zombies are terrible and I don't think they'd succeed at ending the world tbh
Quote by SG_dave at #33549256
I've never wanted to see a guy eat dick so much in my life.
Quote by ali.guitarkid7 at #33553650
If you are white, you are scum.
#11
I'd try to score me a nice private island somewhere. Get a nice boat, sail around the world a bit first, see places, meet new people, see more places.

Just have a bit of fun, you know?
#12
Quote by lukeskywalkers at #33524856
Come on dude vote for the safe house or being a bada$$ then
I wouldn't be wandering around the streets just blasting stuff with shotguns and I wouldn't have a safehouse, at most I'd have a makeshift tent
Quote by SG_dave at #33549256
I've never wanted to see a guy eat dick so much in my life.
Quote by ali.guitarkid7 at #33553650
If you are white, you are scum.
#13
Quote by Way Cool JR.
By running at the zombies yelling I'm Rick James, bitch!

Is one of the zombies a very kinky girl? The kind you don't take home to mother?
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#16
Quote by Pastafarian96
plan as usual.

haul ass for the Australian desert.


But the desert would only mummify the zombies! They would last even longer!
Definitely gotta go with the isolation plan though. Escape to somewhere rugged and basically a terrible place to live. Getting food and fighting your environment should be your only concern, ideally.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#17
Quote by slapsymcdougal
Die.

I should probably point out that in the exceedingly unlikely event of zombies, this is most likely what I will do.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#18
Quote by Harvey Swick at #33524965
But the desert would only mummify the zombies! They would last even longer!
Definitely gotta go with the isolation plan though. Escape to somewhere rugged and basically a terrible place to live. Getting food and fighting your environment should be your only concern, ideally.

word
Quote by SG_dave at #33549256
I've never wanted to see a guy eat dick so much in my life.
Quote by ali.guitarkid7 at #33553650
If you are white, you are scum.
#19
Quote by Harvey Swick
But the desert would only mummify the zombies! They would last even longer!
Definitely gotta go with the isolation plan though. Escape to somewhere rugged and basically a terrible place to live. Getting food and fighting your environment should be your only concern, ideally.

Everyone says this but they fail to realise that not much stops .308 rounds.
#20
TBH, I'd probably head for here.



And hope I could blag my way in on the basis that my granddad was in the Black Watch in WW2.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#21
Quote by Pastafarian96
Everyone says this but they fail to realise that not much stops .308 rounds.

Fair enough. I just wouldn't want to come across any mummy zombie hybrids. or frozen zombies. or zombies that have been traveling underwater for 2 weeks.

I live in a pretty rural area and, being native American, I have pretty in depth knowledge of the land and how to survive. I would probably just take to the woods. zombies cant climb trees, right? probably build an awesome treehouse and kick it and eat deer and rabbit and wild turnips all the time.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#22
Quote by Pastafarian96
Everyone says this but they fail to realise that not much stops .308 rounds.

Yes, but if you blow a zombie's leg off, you just slow it down. Head shots, or you're just delaying getting ate.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#23
Treehouse would be a safe place to sleep, though it'd severely limit escape options if said tree gets surrounded by zambies
Quote by SG_dave at #33549256
I've never wanted to see a guy eat dick so much in my life.
Quote by ali.guitarkid7 at #33553650
If you are white, you are scum.
#24
Step 1: find gun
Step 2: kill self


There is literally no point trying to survive an 'apocalypse'.

Also zombies are pure fantasy, they're often portrayed as perpetual motion machines that never die. As long as they don't eat they'll be unable to move eventually.
Last edited by stratkat at Jul 30, 2015,
#26
Quote by Deliriumbassist
Or we could all just hole up for a few weeks and wait for decay and putrefaction to do all the work for us. The only worry will be exploding corpses.

That would seriously depend on the type of zombie we are dealing with. Are they like 28 Days Later-esque rage-filled monsters? Are they Resident Evil style where theyre all scary and run around? Or Night Of The Living Dead zombies? Maybe it's some kind of devil worship and theyre all possessed by Satan? The limits are literally up to your imagination.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#27
Quote by slapsymcdougal
Yes, but if you blow a zombie's leg off, you just slow it down. Head shots, or you're just delaying getting ate.

well duh, that's the point of a bludgeoning weapon if you miss and take out an arm.
#28
Quote by Harvey Swick
That would seriously depend on the type of zombie we are dealing with. Are they like 28 Days Later-esque rage-filled monsters? Are they Resident Evil style where theyre all scary and run around? Or Night Of The Living Dead zombies? Maybe it's some kind of devil worship and theyre all possessed by Satan? The limits are literally up to your imagination.

I stick with the Brooksian zombie, mostly.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#29
Quote by Harvey Swick
That would seriously depend on the type of zombie we are dealing with. Are they like 28 Days Later-esque rage-filled monsters? Are they Resident Evil style where theyre all scary and run around? Or Night Of The Living Dead zombies? Maybe it's some kind of devil worship and theyre all possessed by Satan? The limits are literally up to your imagination.


28 Days Later zombies aren't zombies. They just hangry.
#30
World War Z zombies
Quote by DisarmGoliath
Facesitting is a violation of freedom of speech, because how can you speak when you have an ass covering your face?
#31
Quote by Cardbored
World War Z zombies

Book or movie?

If you answer movie, you suck.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#32
Quote by Cardbored
World War Z zombies

yeah I was thinking this. Book World War Z zombies.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#33
Quote by Harvey Swick
yeah I was thinking this. Book World War Z zombies.

I call them 'Brooksian zombies', after the author(who is Mel Brooks' son).
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#34
Quote by slapsymcdougal
Book or movie?

If you answer movie, you suck.

Eh if it were the movie zombies I'd probably shoot myself
Quote by DisarmGoliath
Facesitting is a violation of freedom of speech, because how can you speak when you have an ass covering your face?
#35
Quote by Cardbored
Eh if it were the movie zombies I'd probably shoot myself

Or get cancer

Or AIDS...
Last edited by Minicaxotinho at Jul 30, 2015,
#37
Live on a boat. You could make a tow line with some rafts behind you for a rendering station.

Anything with fat can be rendered down for oil. Kill zombies from a safe distance. Go in an collect the bodies, render them down and make bio-diesel for fuel (that's pretty easy, though I haven't done with human remains, obviously.)

Then you have fuel for the engine/generator. You're safe from zombies, unless they can figure out how to swim. And you can fish for food and make occasional excursions to forage for food.

Last edited by BobBastard at Oct 18, 2015,
#38
Quote by slapsymcdougal
TBH, I'd probably head for here.



And hope I could blag my way in on the basis that my granddad was in the Black Watch in WW2.



Is that Ft. George?
#39
Quote by ultimate-slash
I'd try to score me a nice private island somewhere. Get a nice boat, sail around the world a bit first, see places, meet new people, see more places.

Just have a bit of fun, you know?


That won't work. Zombies don't die underwater, they just keep walking and walking until one night, you're asleep in your tent, the coals have died down, and you hear that moan...
Quote by Overlord
It's not hard to be nice, but it's nice to be hard
#40
Quote by lukeskywalkers
It's back motherfs


Sod off m8
The plan was to drink until the pain over.
But what's worse, the pain or the hangover?
Who am I? I'm a titan so be expectin' a clash.