#1
I'm a guitarist and singer in "band". I say " band" because vits been quite awhile since we've done anything. I continually write music all the time. But I'm not even sure they even touch their instruments. They have other interests and jobs and it seems like their more focused on the those things. They're both amazing musicians when they actually play and musicians in general are scarce in my area. So what I'm asking is, how do I get them to understand my viewpoint and get motivated? I miss playing in a band and I just want to play music. Cheers!
#2
Be upfront and sincere. Explain that you really want to keep playing music and that you want to do it with them. If they don't want to pursue music as much as you do, you'll move on. They're not screwing you over and you're not ditching them. These things just happen.
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#4
Its important that the members of any band be on the same page in terms of motivation and commitment in order for the band to work. Set goals for the band (gigs, recordings, promotion etc). If members don't want to commit then its probably time to find new blood.

If you're a singer and a guitarist you can consider going out solo, not to say abandon the idea of a band but have this option so either way you can still go out and gig.
#5
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#6
I had the same issue. I simply told them to get it together or I'd find someone to replace them. It sucks to do that but now it's running on all cylinders. Dead weight will just slow everything down.
#7
also i'll add that it's far easier to teach someone how to play music than to teach someone how to want to play music
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#8
It's always been a struggle and a compromise in every band I was ever in. It's a lot like a marriage and we know how situations and people change over time (that's why we have such a high divorce rate). My suggestion would be that you get together with your band mates and just go out for a burger or for a drink or just have a get together night with no playing involved and tell them how you feel. Get a feel for what they really want to do. They might have issues that they feel are not being considered and are frustrated to the point where they appear to just not care when they really do. Either way you'll all feel much better about just opening up about it the situation. In the long run if you decide to move on you'll most likely still have two friends who understand why and that's important.
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#9
Quote by robpm9995
I'm a guitarist and singer in "band". I say " band" because vits been quite awhile since we've done anything. I continually write music all the time. But I'm not even sure they even touch their instruments. They have other interests and jobs and it seems like their more focused on the those things. They're both amazing musicians when they actually play and musicians in general are scarce in my area. So what I'm asking is, how do I get them to understand my viewpoint and get motivated? I miss playing in a band and I just want to play music. Cheers!


Keep it fun and encourage their creative input so the songs become collaborative works rather than "your" songs. Band mates need a sense of ownership and a goal (regular gigs) or it just becomes a chore. We all do this for fun so make that a top priority. Never allow yourself to be perceived as a demanding taskmaster unless you are paying them for their time ala Frank Zappa. Never criticize your band mates for flubbing a part. Ever. Just laugh it off and play it again or rework that section. Make band rehearsal the most fun they have had all week and the will begin to crave it.
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Last edited by Cajundaddy at Aug 13, 2015,
#10
You know sometimes life happens. Commitments and obligations happen at the speed of life. And sometimes you have to realize that your order of priorities aren't just like theirs. So does that make them wrong for not being in step?

Not necessarily. You're not working their jobs, paying their mortgages, supporting their families, cultivating their meaningful life relationships outside of your circle.

So, as the others have said, have a talk with them if its an issue and they arent as gung ho about it, and see what they say....or else, live with the idea that, "at least having someone to play with is better than having no one to play with", until you have a better situation come up and then move on to that.

Best,

Sean
#11
I'm intrigued that - apparently - you're "not even sure they even touch their instruments. They have other interests and jobs and it seems like their more focused on the those things" - but - "They're both amazing musicians when they actually play". Those two statements don't sit well together and ring a little alarm bell.

Maybe there's something they're not telling you? Maybe it's not that they're not interested in playing, but they're not interested in playing with you? Maybe they are playing in secret (how can be so amazing if they never touch their instruments?), maybe even with someone else? And maybe they can't summon the courage to tell you (which is why they appear uninterested)?

Not a nice thought, of course, and I could be reading too much into it.

Looking on the bright side, it's all good advice above. If you think it's worth one more push before going solo (or looking around for others), try impressing on them how good you think they are; that it would be a shame if they gave up, because they have so much potential. (It may be that they're losing interest because nothing is happening, and they don't think they're as good as you think they are.)

What's the gig situation like? Have you ever played live with them? Is there no current opportunity to do that? No local jams? Lack of gigs is a death knell for a lot of potentially great line-ups. You need that kind of target to aim for, to give you all a reason to continue.
Last edited by jongtr at Aug 13, 2015,
#12
pretty much +1 with rockingamer2 and sean.

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#13
As an alternative you could take up electronic music. You can do it on your own and don't have to listen to drummers being loud whilst you talk. It's much more fruitful imo
#14
yeah but electronic music actually takes skill
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#15
As a general tip, once a band loses momentum, people start quitting.

So does your band have momentum? Doesn't sound like it. Do you have enough songs to play gigs? If so, play more gigs - give the guys a reason to practice.

In the case that they do quit, there are always more musicians out there. Your location is noted as Pittsburgh, and you're about to go to school. Both places will have heaps of musos that you haven't met yet.
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Last edited by AlanHB at Aug 13, 2015,
#16
Dude. Your city has 3 times more people than my entire province. The town I live in has about 1000, probably about 10,000 in a 20 minute radius. I play in 2 bands, and jam with numerous other people. My point being is there are going to be tons of people to play with where you are and the only trouble you may have in finding people would be entirely on you.
#17
This happened to me in my old band, we had 4 people and only me and the bass player were committed to the band. So I took him, made him play drums, and now we have a two piece. My point is, if you're a good enough of a musician and you really want people to hear your songs, you can deliver them any way possible. If other people get in the way of that, say **** 'em and push them to the side.
#18
^^^ Good move Gavin. By separating yourself from the guys who aren't committed, you'll eventually get the lineup of your dreams.
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#19
If they aren't touching their instruments it's not really a band. Just do what batman said and if they really aren't committed then you'll have to look for people who are. Better to start looking now rather than indecisively stick with people who aren't into it while you could be missing loads of people who are interested. The trouble is that someone willing to make the commitment is a rare find. People think that they can't make a living as a band so they don't try, self-fulfilling prophecy.
#20
look around for some other musicians to play with. if your band isnt doing anything than is it is not a big deal if you do your own thing without telling them. in fact, if they really havent been practicing and its been a while perhaps you should go onto craigslist or your local music stores to find a new bands to play with that is as serious as you are!
maybe you will be better off finding just another good guitarist and doing a duo, it can be a lot less hectic than dealing with 3 to 5 peoples problems and excuses. all you would have to do is make a set list to play on the streets or some bars and you can earn some more easy money!