#1
So a couple of months ago, I did this: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1675452

And everyone was gr8, so I followed up on advice for things. Started a dense-if-brief workout routine I can do at home, the results have been surprising, had some great interviews for two very different places I've love to work at, got a date on friday, meeting Gary for the first time on tuesday, generally things are looking okay.

Well, aside from still having horrible mood swings and generally being a 'miserable bastard' to quote my sister.

But really, all this positive stuff is a mixed response to negative stuff.

Recently my dear old dad got a major infection, one that gave us another heart attack scare. Now usually, I'd deal with this sort of thing fairly well but given current mental states, it piled on the anxiety like a dumptruck. It's boiling away underneath and I just feel that I'll explode some day.

Until that happens, I'm also in limbo regarding the interviews. One of them I'm fairly sure I'm secure in but the manager is away for 3 weeks so no news in the mean time, but the other is in an ultra-competitive position and I'm up against more qualified people. That particular one is crushing me cuz I know I'd be great at it, I just hate not knowing where I stand.

Today, I had my first therapy session. As an introductory session, not a lot was discussed other than some basics. I feel like I'm out of place, as I'm the only one contributing to the discussion (which I'm not surprised at, cuz we've all got some sort of depression). It makes me wonder if it'll be beneficial but I couldn't say for sure.

Right, so why an entire thread..

I just feel like I need some reassurance. Everything feels as if its in limbo and it's building up anxiety.

Thanx 4 ur tim
o()o

Quote by JamSessionFreak
yes every night of my entire life i go to bed crying because i wasnt born american
#3
"but the other is in an ultra-competitive position and I'm up against more qualified people. That particular one is crushing me cuz I know I'd be great at it, I just hate not knowing where I stand."

If you've already had an interview, send them a follow-up email thanking them for the opportunity, and make it clear that you are passionate about this position.

...modes and scales are still useless.


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#4
Is it group therapy?
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#5
Is it weird I thought of Gary Oak before realizing you meant actual Gary.
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#6
Hang in there, Epi, you'll get on top of things in no time
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Did you hear about the cockney Godfather?

He made them an offer they couldn't understand.
#7
Therapy is, as far as I can tell, often a slow burner. You and your therapist need to establish the working relationship that will get you to where you need to be. Stick with it.

Starting is tough. And keeping going is... a different sort of tough. It's also achievable. Whatever else happens, remember that.

There's only room for one useless cunt in this forum, and that's me.

Quote by Xiaoxi
"but the other is in an ultra-competitive position and I'm up against more qualified people. That particular one is crushing me cuz I know I'd be great at it, I just hate not knowing where I stand."

If you've already had an interview, send them a follow-up email thanking them for the opportunity, and make it clear that you are passionate about this position.
This too. You've probably already done your homework about the company and the position they're offering, but it won't hurt to gently remind them of it, too.
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Last edited by slapsymcdougal at Sep 22, 2015,
#8
Quote by Magnumopus7001
things will process and work themselves out in time. don't worry.


Tenks.

Quote by Xiaoxi
"but the other is in an ultra-competitive position and I'm up against more qualified people. That particular one is crushing me cuz I know I'd be great at it, I just hate not knowing where I stand."

If you've already had an interview, send them a follow-up email thanking them for the opportunity, and make it clear that you are passionate about this position.


I plan to when they open tomorrow. I ask my friend who works there for updates, he's usuallly clued in on that thing, but so far, no news, so next logical step.

Quote by mr.******
Is it group therapy?


Yes, small group, just 6 of us. I can identify one person who has proper full on clinical depression, I feel like she might disintegrate if I ever talked to her. It's odd cuz I'm never usually at the forefront of discussion (even if I do it reasonably well).

Quote by ErikLensherr
Is it weird I thought of Gary Oak before realizing you meant actual Gary.


lel

Quote by steve_muse
Hang in there, Epi, you'll get on top of things in no time


tenks stev

Quote by slapsymcdougal
Therapy is, as far as I can tell, often a slow burner. You and your therapist need to establish the working relationship that will get you to where you need to be. Stick with it.

Starting is tough. And keeping going is... a different sort of tough. It's also achievable. Whatever else happens, remember that.

There's only room for one useless cunt in this forum, and that's me.

This too. You've probably already done your homework about the company and the position they're offering, but it won't hurt to gently remind them of it, too.


Thanks Slapsy. I feel like I should persevere with it, even if the outcome is unknown.
o()o

Quote by JamSessionFreak
yes every night of my entire life i go to bed crying because i wasnt born american
#9
I've done group therapy, and i'm still doing one on one, and it just takes time either way. group therapy can be great, cause everyone brings out the dark humour and you just kinda roll through things together, but one on one has the advantage of focused conversation.

keep with it for sure, and never rule out the idea of a psych to get meds or whatever, just if it becomes a possibility.

it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#10
Meditation can help. It takes daily practice and a few months but it will help dampen the anxiety and mood swings. Very much worth it if you're in this for the long run. Maybe bring it up at your next therapy session.
#11
I've been looking into supplements, and ZMA + a protein powder with lots of BCAAs, l theanine, etc. appear to show positive effects for depression, when taken with an excercising regimen.
#12
Quote by Godsmack_IV
Meditation can help. It takes daily practice and a few months but it will help dampen the anxiety and mood swings. Very much worth it if you're in this for the long run. Maybe bring it up at your next therapy session.
Not to derail the thread, but what if your mind is a wasps nest that never slows down? The last time I tried I fell asleep.

Oh, OP, for what it (may) be worth, if prescribed quetiapine, ask for an alternative. It's like being on horse tranquilisers.
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#13
Quote by Banjocal
Not to derail the thread, but what if your mind is a wasps nest that never slows down? The last time I tried I fell asleep.

meds does it for me. I take a sleeping pill (remeron), and then play sudoku on my phone until I get to the point where I can't remember why I put a number in a specific spot that it clearly doesn't go to, and usually within five minutes of that I'm fast asleep


and yeah seroquel is nasty stuff. Has potential for legit messed up side-effects, and you either don't feel it working, or you wake up too drowsy and loopy to do anything
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
Last edited by Baby Joel at Sep 22, 2015,
#14
Quote by Godsmack_IV
Meditation can help. It takes daily practice and a few months but it will help dampen the anxiety and mood swings. Very much worth it if you're in this for the long run. Maybe bring it up at your next therapy session.


where did you learn to do this black magic
#15
Picamilone (compound with GABA + Niacine) and Huperazine A seem to be beneficial for people with attention/focus/energy problems as well. Might be good to check out for a restless mind


You would have to speak with your physician about any possible interactions with medication/vitamins/supplements/etc, however.
Last edited by Fat Lard at Sep 22, 2015,
#17
Quote by Banjocal
Not to derail the thread, but what if your mind is a wasps nest that never slows down? The last time I tried I fell asleep.


It takes practice. Start off short maybe 5 minutes and slowly work your way up to maybe 15.

Quote by eastwinn


where did you learn to do this black magic



its science :^)
#18
Quote by Eastwinn
don't listen to fat lard
if that wasn't obvious


Was based on studies I've read, rather than my own opinion or experience on them.
#19
Group therapy was unsuccessful for me but I see how it can be helpful for others. If sounds like you don't have a hard time speaking in front of others.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#20
Hope you feel better stranger.
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#21
Quote by Banjocal at #33607524
Not to derail the thread, but what if your mind is a wasps nest that never slows down? The last time I tried I fell asleep.

Oh, OP, for what it (may) be worth, if prescribed quetiapine, ask for an alternative. It's like being on horse tranquilisers.

It's really just practice. Don't start thinking it's going to be successful and world changing the first time. Because it will most likely just seem like pointless bullshit. Just start slow with short time periods of relaxation and try to lengthen it as you go.
___

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#22
Hang in there Joe, we believe in you


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo
#23
hey man. I'm feeling dejected as fuck right now. Uni feels dumb, everyone around me seems indifferent towards me, and I'm trying to do better but nothing is really working out for me either. It's so easy for me to hate things, but I'm trying to see the positive side to everyone and just fucking go with it.

I'm seeing a therapist in just over a month from now (therapists book like crazy here, which is a good thing I guess), and for the first time since moving cities I'm not spending the entire fucking summer with my parents and hometown friends. I want to try new things, gain independence for real, meet new people, and do some creative shit like I've been meaning to for the last 5 years.

i hope you'll join me in trying to ride this out, epi. we all got your back k?
#24
Quote by Fat Lard
I've been looking into supplements, and ZMA + a protein powder with lots of BCAAs, l theanine, etc. appear to show positive effects for depression, when taken with an excercising regimen.


Something like this? http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/like/262031303725?adgroupid=&hlpht=true&hlpv=2&rlsatarget=&adtype=pla&ff3=1&lpid=122&poi=&ul_noapp=true&limghlpsr=true&ff19=0&device=c&chn=ps&campaignid=&crdt=0&ff12=67&ff11=ICEP3.0.0-L&ff14=122&viphx=1&ops=true&ff13=80

I looked up ZMA. I get the dietary side of it but there's a lot of nay-saying about the 'improves testosterone' stuff. I dunno. I'll go with whey protein cuz I do have friends who do ridiculous mass building and they swear by it.
o()o

Quote by JamSessionFreak
yes every night of my entire life i go to bed crying because i wasnt born american
#25
I have been in therapy on and off for the last 10 years of my life. I have never found it successful for me


Mind you, I feel very strongly against prescription drugs and shit like that so there's more of a bias against psychiatry there.
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Last edited by H4T3BR33D3R at Sep 23, 2015,