#1
Pretty obvious what this thread is about.

So my weirdest dream involved Linka from Captain Planet and some redhead who I think might have been Emma Watson, and we were doing it on top of an alien spacecraft that somehow managed to go into what I can only assume was a time portal, because we somehow ended up in some catacombs where a harem of angry Egyptians were chasing me for boinking their queen.

Then I woke up and fapped.

What about you perverts ?
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X) Ibanez RG321MH f/w SD SH-11

X) AMT Pangea CP-100 ( AWWW YIS )

X) Line 6 POD HD 500X


When you licky-bum-bum so hard you get sticky num-nums.
Last edited by the_weirdoman at Oct 3, 2015,
#2
idk but i know i was in this one girl's dream doing the things but then she went with someone else and i kind of want to die because of it but not realyy i just want things to be back to what they used to be god darn you ts why did you have to make such a sensitive topic? im sorry ts i didnt mean that im just drunk again.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#3
if you want a serious answer i guess it would have to be that time i was in a school gym porking a 2d anime character but like that 2d thats sort of 3d kind of like those hand held (lol) pokemon games yeah im that pathetic thanks for bringing it up ts im sorry ts its not you its me im just going through some stuff right now and i font know why its like im on my man period.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#4
Ugh this one's terrible because I've had it like 2-3 times in a 20yr span. In a nutshell, 80 yr Asian grandma, has a prehensile tongue in...er...down there that opens up like a venus fly trap and has teeth.

Scares the shit out of me lol.
#5
Quote by Joshua Garcia
if you want a serious answer i guess it would have to be that time i was in a school gym porking a 2d anime character but like that 2d thats sort of 3d kind of like those hand held (lol) pokemon games yeah im that pathetic thanks for bringing it up ts im sorry ts its not you its me im just going through some stuff right now and i font know why its like im on my man period.


You've been watching Turner and Hooch haven't you ?
GEEYUR :

X) Schecter Tempest Custom f/w SD SH-6

X) Ibanez RG321MH f/w SD SH-11

X) AMT Pangea CP-100 ( AWWW YIS )

X) Line 6 POD HD 500X


When you licky-bum-bum so hard you get sticky num-nums.
#6
i dont knwo what that is but ive been watching superior anime hence 2d because all 2d waifus stem from some anime becuase 2d waifus are best waifus but be careful because you can only have one waifu per laifu having more than one waifu will destroy your laifu.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#9
Quote by UltimateGuizar
me+yourmom=69


You have my condolences.
GEEYUR :

X) Schecter Tempest Custom f/w SD SH-6

X) Ibanez RG321MH f/w SD SH-11

X) AMT Pangea CP-100 ( AWWW YIS )

X) Line 6 POD HD 500X


When you licky-bum-bum so hard you get sticky num-nums.
#10
This one was full on Game of Thrones so possible spoilers ahead.

I was the hound escorting Arya aka Maisie Williams to what would become known as the Red Wedding and at some point we fucked.
#11
Quote by DardySon
This one was full on Game of Thrones so possible spoilers ahead.

I was the hound escorting Arya aka Maisie Williams to what would become known as the Red Wedding and at some point we fucked.

This is the most shameful sex dream ever
#12
Quote by whywefight
This is the most shameful sex dream ever

It could be worse.

It could have had the extra-paedo element of being based on the books.
#13
Quote by slapsymcdougal
It could be worse.

It could have had the extra-paedo element of being based on the books.

Yeah I know right at least Maisie is legal now and not, what is it 9? As Arya is in the books.
#14
Quote by DardySon
Yeah I know right at least Maisie is legal now and not, what is it 9? As Arya is in the books.

Something like that.
#15
Quote by slapsymcdougal
Something like that.

Yeah still not proud of it. Although I will admit there is something about Maisie I do find kinda cute I just can't put my finger on it.
#16
Quote by DardySon at #33621561
This one was full on Game of Thrones so possible spoilers ahead.

I was the hound escorting Arya aka Maisie Williams to what would become known as the Red Wedding and at some point we fucked.

Wow.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#17
One of my favorite ways to masturbate was to sneak into my aunt's closet, when I'd be visiting at her house. She would be working in the garden outside; I'd tell her I'd like to watch TV. Then, I'd sneak into her closet. She had dozens of pairs of high heels, but my favorites were the open-toed high-heeled pumps. I'd place my soft cock through the open-toe of the shoe; then my cock would get hard and I couldn't get the shoe off my dick without cumming.

I'd use the shoe to gently but constantly pull my dick up and down. The feelings were just on the edge of some pain, but fantastically exciting at the same time. I'd come inside her shoes; my cock would soften; then I'd pull my dick out. So, ladies, when you are strutting down the street in your open-toe high heels, just think about who might have cum inside your shoes!
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Quote by jetfuel495
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#18
Quote by Horsedick.MPEG
One of my favorite ways to masturbate was to sneak into my aunt's closet, when I'd be visiting at her house. She would be working in the garden outside; I'd tell her I'd like to watch TV. Then, I'd sneak into her closet. She had dozens of pairs of high heels, but my favorites were the open-toed high-heeled pumps. I'd place my soft cock through the open-toe of the shoe; then my cock would get hard and I couldn't get the shoe off my dick without cumming.

I'd use the shoe to gently but constantly pull my dick up and down. The feelings were just on the edge of some pain, but fantastically exciting at the same time. I'd come inside her shoes; my cock would soften; then I'd pull my dick out. So, ladies, when you are strutting down the street in your open-toe high heels, just think about who might have cum inside your shoes!


So we were talking about dreams horsedick, but thanks for sharing.
#19
probably the tenth time i've brought it up, but i once had a dream where i was a girl getting fucked by an old man.

i woke up very confused.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#20
Quote by jakesmellspoo
probably the tenth time i've brought it up, but i once had a dream where i was a girl getting fucked by an old man.

i woke up very confused.

You're obv a trans in denial. Best rip your dick off.
#21
I caught Megan Fox poisoning soda that House (as in, the intelligent asshole doctor guy) was going to drink. She banged me in return for keeping my silence. The funny thing is that dreams like that always make perfect sense at the time.
#22
had one involving absurdly rough sex with Susan Sarandon. Modern day... wouldn't call her one of my favorites, but whatevs.
oddly enough it was really hot and ive used the memory a few times. replacing her of course.
#23
i was having sex with this girl and then she kept turning into other people, including my mother, some dude, etc.
#24
Quote by MeGaDeth2314
i was having sex with this girl and then she kept turning into other people, including my mother, some dude, etc.

Dat Oedipus complex doe.
#25
Quote by gratefulduck
had one involving absurdly rough sex with Susan Sarandon. Modern day... wouldn't call her one of my favorites, but whatevs.

She was quite a dish back the day
#26
Very rough sex with one of the girls from work in the middle of the courtroom.....while court was sitting.....
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#27
I know I've had some extremely weird ones but I almost never remember my dreams. After the first few minutes of being awake they're getting hazy, and after an hour or so it's rare that I remember anything about them at all.
#28
The only dream wet dream I've ever had was a dream where I was anally penetrating Betty Rubble (wife of barney rubble as seen in the flinstones) on my grandma's couch.
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Quote by Momentosis
Void is a wanker that's why

#29
Quote by FireFromTheVoid
The only dream wet dream I've ever had was a dream where I was anally penetrating Betty Rubble (wife of barney rubble as seen in the flinstones) on my grandma's couch.

You were thinking of Wilma, though, right?
#31
This is mine.

I'm at my old street, people are trying to chase me down and find me, I have a golf club in my hand. I escape into an apartment building.

I walk into an unlocked apartment. There is a woman with huge tits on a computer and another person in a back room on a different computer.

I go into the back room and bludgeon the fat man to death with my golf club.

I go back into the main room and I'm like suck my dick, and the woman gets on her knees. She's like is this for real? I go it's no joke.

I whip out her fat titties, feel them titties while shes gobblin the knob and I jizzed in my pants.

This was also on the morning of my first day of work.
#32
I don't wanna talk about it.


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo
#33
The weird thing was I was having sex.
Quote by neidnarb11890
the chinese take-out place my family always ordered from gave you chopsticks, so as a kid it was fun to try & eat with chopsticks
now i just use a fork, 'cuz nothing is fun anymore & i just want to shovel food into my mouth to fill the void