#1
I used to count 13. Yes, when I urinated I counted and I usually counted to 13. If there were little pieces of feces on the inside of the toilet bowl I would pretend like they were Klingons, Klingon ships and my flow of urine was a phaser from the spaceship enterprise.
#2
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#3
Depends on how much water I drink during the day.

When I never drink water, usually 8 seconds.

When I do drink water, usually 15 seconds.


#5
Quote by Momentosis at #33648414

Quote by MeTallIcA313
Guys, you heard Mr. Sacamano. No fun until racism is over.
#11
That's "starship" Enterprise and my piss sessions have no average length
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
#12
After I wake up they take forever so I stop counting.
If I've been drinking a lot they take forever but I can't be bothered with counting while drunk anyway.

Other than that I would assume they last a fairly normal amount of time
#13
I'm not sure, but if I was absolutely busting I think I could work out the velocity at which the urine travelled with some basic fluid mechanics
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#14
You guys ever hold up your pee for so long that you end up going to the bathroom and you're standing there going at full force for a good thirty seconds, and then you think you're done, but you want to squeeze the last bit out, and it turns out you had another 15 seconds of full blasting left?
#15
Quote by ultimate-slash
You guys ever hold up your pee for so long that you end up going to the bathroom and you're standing there going at full force for a good thirty seconds, and then you think you're done, but you want to squeeze the last bit out, and it turns out you had another 15 seconds of full blasting left?

yes.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#18
i was drinking at a New Years party once and took a really long (probably 30 seconds or more) pee and this guy's fiancee' was apparently standing outside of the bathroom and asked me "taking a long pee, huh?" when i came out.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#19
Quote by jakesmellspoo
i was drinking at a New Years party once and took a really long (probably 30 seconds or more) pee and this guy's fiancee' was apparently standing outside of the bathroom and asked me "taking a long pee, huh?" when i came out.

who even asks that?
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#20
Quote by jakesmellspoo
this guy's fiancee' was apparently standing outside of the bathroom and asked me "taking a long pee, huh?"


... while examining a stopwatch and scribbling notes on a clipboard, muttering about vectors.
#21
I tried doing the maths to determine urine stream velocity but I'm too tired right now.
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#22
Quote by jakesmellspoo
i was drinking at a New Years party once and took a really long (probably 30 seconds or more) pee and this guy's fiancee' was apparently standing outside of the bathroom and asked me "taking a long pee, huh?" when i came out.


as he seductively bit his lip

Quote by Pastafarian96
I an evety characyer in this story
#23
Quote by ultimate-slash
You guys ever hold up your pee for so long that you end up going to the bathroom and you're standing there going at full force for a good thirty seconds, and then you think you're done, but you want to squeeze the last bit out, and it turns out you had another 15 seconds of full blasting left?

on a trip from Northwest Illinois, about 120 miles west of Chicago to Denver I held my pee in all the way because I could not pee in front of another person and all restrooms are crowded. By the time we got to Denver: sounds like a song doesn't it?: IPd and when I was done it still felt like I had to but I didn't think I broke something. But I was young and it healed up fine and I got over my shy bladder syndrome that's another story but I assure you I completely got over it, without professional help.
#24
One time I went to a party, drank about 20 cans of beer, and didn't pee all night.

I woke up a few hours later with my bladder pressing on pretty much every one of my vital organs.

I went outside and peed on my lemon tree for what felt like a whole other lifetime, seasons changed around me, night morphed into day.

It died
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#25
Quote by i_lovemetallica
One time I went to a party, drank about 20 cans of beer, and didn't pee all night.

I woke up a few hours later with my bladder pressing on pretty much every one of my vital organs.

I went outside and peed on my lemon tree for what felt like a whole other lifetime, seasons changed around me, night morphed into day.

It died

yes night to day day to night the morphing . It's called twilight. It's my favorite time the evening, the blessed evening the gentle sacred night. The dark sacred night as they say in song what a wonderful world. Thank the Lord for the nighttime. I like night. I don't have to squint. It's not hot or as. People don't bug me as much because they're mostly asleep. Yes, I like night. The night is good. I'm like a vampire who does not suck blood. I just suck. And no not what you're thinking. Not in the literal sense.
#26
Quote by i_lovemetallica
One time I went to a party, drank about 20 cans of beer, and didn't pee all night.

I woke up a few hours later with my bladder pressing on pretty much every one of my vital organs.

I went outside and peed on my lemon tree for what felt like a whole other lifetime, seasons changed around me, night morphed into day.

It died

dude

you have something wrong with you
#27
Quote by Ssargentslayer
dude

you have something wrong with you

Not after taking that wizz, I felt like a new man
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#28
I'm always stacking P's
Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
Youre officially uber shit now.

Quote by StewieSwan
3d9310rd is far more upset than i 

Quote by Bladez22
I'm a moron tho apparently and everyone should listen to you oh wise pretentious one
#29
over-urinated a lemon tree
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#30
Lemon tree very pretty and the lemon flower is sweet but the fruit of the poor lemon is impossible to be peed upon
#32
i have a gigantic bladder. it's not uncommon for me to pee for 30-45 seconds straight before the dripples start


Quote by i_lovemetallica
One time I went to a party, drank about 20 cans of beer, and didn't pee all night.

I woke up a few hours later with my bladder pressing on pretty much every one of my vital organs.

I went outside and peed on my lemon tree for what felt like a whole other lifetime, seasons changed around me, night morphed into day.

It died


drugs
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

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