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#1
Around the ages 3-10, who actually had a good childhood? Who had a bad childhood?
What was life growing up?
Did you face: Neglect, abuse, poverty,
Did you receive: Support, encouragement, love

Your past has a strong effect on your personality and outlook on life. And it probably pains some of you to talk about it, but please do so because it might help someone here. Some of you might of had a great childhood, please talk about that as well. Don't downplay anything, your input is important
Last edited by TwoPlusTwo at Nov 3, 2015,
#2
My mom ran away before I was born.
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#4
it was pretty gud all things considered

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#5
I had a great childhood

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#7
I grew up in a poor family. My parents couldn't give us many things, but we had something other kids didn't have.

Freedom. My sister and I were granted freedom to roam far and wide. As long as we did well in school and did our chores we were allowed to roam unimpeded as far as our legs or bicycles would carry us. As long as we were home in time for dinner! Plus my parents gave me one indulgence: sports. I was allowed to participate in sports to my heart's content.

I had a good childhood. My parents aren't touchy feely, but I've never doubted they loved me completely.
#8
my parents are still together, and fully supported me all of my life (even though my dad whipped the crap out of me plenty of times, oh well i deserved it for being a lil shit)

went on a lot of vacations/visited a lot of cool places/road trips/few countries

grew up as a middle child though
(sucks having an older sister and younger sister, never got most attention ever)

middle-class/upper middle-class, nice neighborhoods growing up, good schools.

never had a crap load of friends to hang out with, but grew up with a few really close ones.

pretty average student in most classes, besides english/art which i excelled far beyond most of my peers at (srs i got the highest score in my entire grade/class on a state writing exam in the 6th grade. Got my picture taken and shit. LIKE THAT MATTERS NOW.... lol)

wasn't the most athletic/strongest/tallest kid ever. At least not until college. So i hated trying out for the sports teams / playing sports with the bigger kids as an young kid.

was lucky enough to be able to get into photography/writing/music/playing instruments at a young age, and that passion has definitely impacted who I am today and my interests.
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Last edited by k.lainad at Nov 3, 2015,
#11
I thought so, we didn't have much but my parents always tried to keep me happy.

My teenage years were a convoluted fucked up nightmare.
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#13
Yep, parents are still together, I have 3 other siblings, I went to a good school, my parents took me on all sorts of adventures and encouraged me to be creative and curious, basically let me do what I wanted without any judgement from them, but always made sure I was aware of the consequences of what I may do...

All in all, I have no complaints.
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#14
It was pretty great
My dad has been partially disabled for as long as I can remember, so he could only work mornings (a legal thing), meaning he was home every afternoon. Unfortunately he'd also get tired really quickly and wasn't really able to play sports with us or anything, but it was still cool to spend a lot of time with him.
My mom only worked 3.5 to 4 days a week, so got to spend a lot of time with her as well.

I did pretty well in school (aside from the fact that I was (still am) a smart-ass and never did any homework/studying), so no issues there. Had nice friends, got along with my siblings (when we weren't fighting that is). I was a happy kid
#15
Quote by ultimate-slash
My dad has been partially disabled for as long as I can remember, so he could only work mornings (a legal thing),

How does that work, if you don't mind me asking?
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#16
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How does that work, if you don't mind me asking?

Well, he does have a disability - post-polio syndrome - but he's legally only considered to be about 50% disabled, meaning he can/has to work half days and is only entitled to half the compensation a "fully disabled" person would get.
#17
I had two loving parents that tried to make ends meet yet still gave everything i needed. I didnt ask for much, at all. I had a tv with cartoons. I had a computer with games on it. I had other children to interact with. I had a good childhood.

My only issue is that my dad made fun of me for watching the Samurai Pizza Cats. Later it turned out he did it cos he lacked as a child the entertainment I had.
Purple string dampener scrunchy.
#19
Parents always provided for me and my brother plus more, cannot complain about that at all. Always went to private high school, but as a result of that i live in a modest house in a modest neighborhood which im thankful for looking back.

I was always a little shit outside of the house though, my mom hid how much trouble i would get into at school from my dad, which wasnt good. And i could pretty much do whatever i wanted at a younger age, no REAL curfew. The freedom they gave was probably too much ant they shouldve been more strict but it is what it is. Always did decent to really well in school though.
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#21
I had a dog, I had a .22 to shoot squirrels, I had new clothes for school and was never hungry. Anything I could complain about isn't terribly significant.
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#22
I had an interesting childhood.

My family was quite poor, but we always saved enough to go on a holiday abroad every once in awhile. If we couldn't afford to go to another country in the summer, we took our caravan or our speedboat out on the water around the Lake District, Loch Lomond, we even towed the boat all the way to Catalunya and explored the Mediterranean coast with it. There was this one time (on said holiday) when we were on the boat en route to a local marina, and we sailed right into the heart of a small cyclone in an attempt to moor up and find shelter before it reached us. It was already there when we arrived and it was tearing shit apart and we sent out a distress call on our radio. It was fucking terrifying. We weren't hurt though and surprisingly, the boat was completely fine. 2 days later, we went fishing in a small cove with crystal clear waters 100 ft deep, nearby about 50 skinny dipping hot chicks. It was quite an adventure.

My dad pointed me in the direction of studying engineering-related pursuits and since I had no other ambitions, I thought that I may as well see which path this would take me down. It ended up being a huge regret in the long term of my career ambitions. But I did have some interesting hobbies such as flying model planes and Scalextric because of it, which were fun while they lasted. I had a few other hobbies too like Judo, playing violin, playing trumpet, boy scouts, so I did a good variety of things.

I was bullied pretty hard in school, but schoolwork itself was easy and I had couple of good friends, one of which I still visit on a regular basis. Wasn't too athletic but I got by okay. There were very few occasions when I got into trouble and I didn't get detention once. I was a good student. Probably one of the most memorable occasions for me was falling over something on the field around the back of the school where my friends and I would hang out. There was some construction work going on nearby and a shard of glass had buried itself into the grass. Well, I fell on the shard of glass on my knee and the wound was down to the bone. I had never bled so much in my life. I had a dozen stitches. Scar on my knee is still there. I became known as "that kid who bled fucking everywhere that one time." High School was pretty decent at first, but it got worse year after year. My AS Level year was a fucking disaster, but that's a story for another time.

There's other little stories like that littered all over my childhood and I had a nice variety of experiences. It was a lot more fun than my teenage years.
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Last edited by T00DEEPBLUE at Nov 3, 2015,
#24
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I had an interesting childhood.

My family was quite poor, but we always saved enough to go on a holiday abroad every once in awhile. If we couldn't afford to go to another country in the summer, we took our caravan or our speedboat out on the water around the Lake District, Loch Lomond, we even towed the boat all the way to Catalunya and explored the Mediterranean coast with it.
.


I don't think you know what "quite poor" really means...
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
#26
Quote by Arby911
I don't think you know what "quite poor" really means...


As someone who grew up on and just above the poverty line, I think it's kind of interesting to see when people claim to have grown up poor and see what their qualifier for that is.

I think in the American culture to have grown up poor means to have grown up tough and tested, and people want to ascribe those attributes to themselves.

EDIT: I think it's also interesting to see how economic values transfer. My parents made enough to get us by, but definitely only enough that we qualified for a slew of social aid programs. My parents were firm of the stance that there were people who were worse off that actually needed it so we never needed it.

I was always frustrated during my post-college years when working entry-level jobs that I qualified for some programs and never took it because I was only one person, but I had colleagues who were stacking up on it despite the fact that they made more than me. I guess I believe too much in the idea of social justice and community responsibility.
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Last edited by JustRooster at Nov 3, 2015,
#27
Quote by T00DEEPBLUE
Iwe even towed the boat all the way to Catalunya and explored the Mediterranean coast with it.
Hate to break this to you, but you are middle class
#28
Quote by Arby911
I don't think you know what "quite poor" really means...

Well we were in very financially precarious positions on several occasions. My dad was a self-employed electrical contractor and the amount of income we'd receive was sporadic. Sometimes we'd be able to afford the mortgage if there was a very large job that my dad had just finished. At other months, we weren't so lucky.

We came up with many creative ways to afford the things we had. The boat we bought was a shell that we got for nothing. But I helped fix it up with my dad, including rebuilding the engine and patching up areas of the hull that had osmosis blisters, reupholstering the interior etc. Many of the parts we used to replace the old ones were acquired at a scrap yard for pocket change. The only real money we spent was on getting the parts we needed to rebuild the engine. We sold the boat for more than what we invested and bought a caravan.

The caravan we had was a rot box as well, but we made do and mended whatever went wrong with it ourselves.

We could go abroad more often once my mum got a pay rise.
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Last edited by T00DEEPBLUE at Nov 3, 2015,
#29
Quote by JustRooster
As someone who grew up on the poverty line, I think it's kind of interesting to see when people claim to have grown up poor and see what their qualifier for that is.

I think in the American culture to have grown up poor means to have grown up tough and tested, and people want to ascribe those attributes to themselves.


I grew up at or near the poverty line, and never knew it until I got older. I had a great childhood, I just didn't have a lot of stuff. My stepdad worked (and worked HARD, can see to can't see, 6 days a week and often 7 during harvest or calving) as a ranchhand on a cattle and wheat operation in Montana and my mom cooked for the crew, who also lived in the basement bedrooms of the house we lived in. The house was hot in the summer and cold in the winter (no central air/heat here, and my upstairs bedroom often had frost inside in the winter) but we did fine. I spent most of my formative years roaming the countryside with a .22 single shot rifle and 4 or 5 cartridges. You learn not to miss.

Although I've given my own children a standard of living that vastly exceeds anything I could have ever dreamed of growing up, I sometimes wonder if my childhood was actually better than theirs...


Quote by T00DEEPBLUE
Well we were in very financially precarious positions on several occasions. My dad was a self-employed electrical contractor and the amount of income we'd receive was sporadic. Sometimes we'd be able to afford the mortgage if there was a very large job that my dad had just finished. At other months, we weren't so lucky.

We came up with many creative ways to afford the things we had. The boat we bought was a shell that we got for nothing. But I helped fix it up with my dad, including rebuilding the engine and patching up areas of the hull that had osmosis blisters, reupholstering the interior etc. Many of the parts we used to replace the old ones were acquired at a scrap yard for pocket change. The only real money we spent was on getting the parts we needed to rebuild the engine. We sold the boat for more than what we invested and bought a caravan.

The caravan we had was a rot box as well, but we made do and mended whatever went wrong with it ourselves.

We could go abroad more often once my mum got a pay rise.



Fair enough, that wasn't the impression I got from the initial post.
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
Last edited by Arby911 at Nov 3, 2015,
#30
I had a great childhood. My teen years were awesome too. I had a lot of friends, did a lot of shit and had a sweet time.


Im boring as shit now though
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#32
Quote by Arby911
I spent most of my formative years roaming the countryside with a .22 single shot rifle and 4 or 5 cartridges. You learn not to miss.


Fair enough, that wasn't the impression I got from the initial post.



I grew up with a box of rounds, but I only had a bolt-action. Same lesson learned, though. Squirrels and pheasants run away by the time you get another one chambered

And that's a very good point you raised initially. I would say my experience is the same, I didn't know that we grew up in the poorer end of the spectrum until I was a lot older. I wouldn't consider my parent's income an important formative factor of my upbringing. I was a happy kid.
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#34
My childhood was pretty ok. It was a mix of weirdly bad and weirdly good experiences.

My parents have a ton of money so I grew up in big houses and summer houses but you can see that they made efforts to not spoil me so I never had an allowance without doing substantial amounts of chores and since I was the youngest, most of my clothes and toys were hand me downs. Like for something to get replaced, it would have to be repaired twice first. It wasn't even that they were cheap, they just wanted us to take value in whatever it was we had.

So I'd be living in a mansion but wearing my older brother's clothes and playing a super nintendo with one game (gfinal fantasy mystic quest) when all my friends had playstations and shit. And I'd never have any money to go out even though all my friends did.

Whenever we'd travel, we would do one night in a 5 star hotel and another night in a posada style bed and breakfast. The idea being you want to be comfortable sometimes but you also want to meet the people living in whatever place we were.
Last edited by flexiblemile at Nov 3, 2015,
#35
Quote by Arby911
I grew up at or near the poverty line, and never knew it until I got older. I had a great childhood, I just didn't have a lot of stuff. My stepdad worked (and worked HARD, can see to can't see, 6 days a week and often 7 during harvest or calving) as a ranchhand on a cattle and wheat operation in Montana and my mom cooked for the crew, who also lived in the basement bedrooms of the house we lived in. The house was hot in the summer and cold in the winter (no central air/heat here, and my upstairs bedroom often had frost inside in the winter) but we did fine. I spent most of my formative years roaming the countryside with a .22 single shot rifle and 4 or 5 cartridges. You learn not to miss.

Although I've given my own children a standard of living that vastly exceeds anything I could have ever dreamed of growing up, I sometimes wonder if my childhood was actually better than theirs...

Sounds to me like you had a chance to learn on your own as a kid, by which I mean to explore and discover. No doubt all the basics of parenting and school that everyone learns are incredibly important as well, but it's the stuff that you discover on your own that excites you most as a kid and shapes you into an individual.

But that's coming from someone with no knowledge of parenting whatsoever
#36
my childhood was awful

a lot of bad stuff happened but one of the bigger things was my dad mixed pills and alcohol made me watch him attempt suicide and said it was my fault. step mom bolted and left me and my infant brother to deal with it. after a while he passed out and i unbarred the door to let police in and that was basically the end of the night, to put it simply

its all gucci now tho
#37
Quote by ultimate-slash
Sounds to me like you had a chance to learn on your own as a kid, by which I mean to explore and discover. No doubt all the basics of parenting and school that everyone learns are incredibly important as well, but it's the stuff that you discover on your own that excites you most as a kid and shapes you into an individual.

But that's coming from someone with no knowledge of parenting whatsoever


Aren't there are a few studies that show that formulation of knowledge and personality comes mostly from forces external of the household?
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Last edited by JustRooster at Nov 3, 2015,
#39
Quote by soundgarden1986
my childhood was awful

a lot of bad stuff happened but one of the bigger things was my dad mixed pills and alcohol made me watch him attempt suicide and said it was my fault. step mom bolted and left me and my infant brother to deal with it. after a while he passed out and i unbarred the door to let police in and that was basically the end of the night, to put it simply

its all gucci now tho

Fuckkkkkkk dude

My chikdhood wasn't great but it was a 10/10 compared to that
#40
yea but it was 10 years ago no point in staying angry about it. that wont get me anywhere

at this point in time its more "a thing that happened" instead of something actively upsetting me. after it happened i moved in with my mom, out of a terrible part of the city, and basically i that didnt happen id probably be in a much worse spot than i am now

it was basically the catalyst for all the things im currently happy about having
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