#1
New song I'm working on after having a brainwave on a bus 2 days ago.

Up to the 2nd chorus so far. Also reminds me of why I desperately need a pop-filter!

https://soundcloud.com/paulgrumblegrumblegrumble/667-demo


EDIT: Now has a breakdown and solo, and outro section. Still lacking a solo / lead guitar parts though which will be left to my guitarist.

Lyrics:

Show me your heart,
Show me your fire,
Tell me secrets, your deepest desire,
I can see right through you,
Into the real you,
Every saint falls, when they're shown the path.

Whisper softly,
Whisper of sin,
It feeds you gently as temptation sinks in,
I know that you won't,
Give in so fast,
But every saint falls, so down with the last.


Well if you fell short of heaven,
At 6, 6, 7,
Then come down with me,
Where we all live forever,

If you trade me for the 7,
At 6, 6, 7,
Come down with me,
Where we'll always be together,

Well if you fell short of heaven,
At 6, 6, 7,
Then come down with me,
Where we all burn together,

If you trade me for the 7,
At 6, 6, 7,
Come down with me,
Cus no one gets to heaven,


You know it's easy,
You know it's fast,
It's only time til' it comes to pass,
The more you resist,
The harder you fall,
It's time to give in to the siren's call,

Walk down the carpet,
Of a land bizzare,
Every narcotic, makes you a star,
Your sugar tooth smile,
So sickly sweet,
I wanna treat you like a piece of meat.


Be sure to link yours for a comment back!
Last edited by karstaag666 at Jan 27, 2016,
#2
Dang man are those your vocals? if so they kick ass, this is a great song, the lyrics are catchy and everything, it had my head banging the whole time. The rhythm guitar is good but it could be louder and the bass is heavy. The song could use a guitar solo though it is hard rock after all, but that is my individual preference I think every song needs a solo lol.

C4C here - https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1694428
#3
Haha thanks man, just shredding my vocal cords away.
The 2nd verse I'm not too keen on (part 1 of it at least) but the rest of it with practice I think will sound cool.

Definitely going to have a guitar solo coming up after that 2nd chorus.

Will check yours out now!
#4
I like this song, just straight up metal song. The vocals are really good too. Reminds me of Chuck Billy mixed with Hetfield and someone else I don't know. So you have a unique tone for metal and something that would appeal to a wide audience of metal types.

I like the use of the synth sounds to give it a more evil sound in some of the parts. I hear some cool sounding effects too that blend in perfectly with the song.

1:51 Vocals had some weird fade-in going on, it was noticeable to make me want to comment about it.

A guitar solo would fit nicely maybe at 2:11 or after 2:18. Either way I think the part between 2:11 - 2:18 could be expanded a little more to incorporate a solo into it.

I didn't hear any issues with production really so it's nice for a demo. I like it, would probably be a good live song too if you got a band.
#5
Thanks man, just brought a big smile to my face! I actually learnt how to do vocals like that from taking the piss out of Hetfield's "Yeah"s coincidentally. Influences are more from bands like Entombed, The Cumshots, Chrome Division, and a bunch of hardcore punk bands.

The dodgy fade in bit on the vocals is where I'm wearing a pair of tights on my head to act as a pop-filter and unfortunately the F broke through and popped.

Guitar solo is coming up after the 2nd chorus, my guitarist will probably add a lick or too in places however. Can't wait for my band to work on it!
#6
Wow, vocals are really good, mix of Hetfield and Lemmy Track could use some lead guitar parts to take it in a new level and be extra entertaining and of course this track could use a cool wah-wah solo! But nonetheless has amibtitious! Rock on brother!
#7
This song's pretty mad bro. I dig the guitar tone and the lyrics are awesome. Agree with the other guys though, a solo would give it just that little extra push it needs.

If you wouldn't mind, could you have a listen to my demo? First time at recording, so after some feedback on the song itself and how it the recording sounds. Haven't got the vocals in yet but they're in the vein of an A Day to Remember or The Ghost Inside (with more of a focus on clean singing).

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B8vRXSjxB4XvSlpYeEhHTWIya1k

Cheers, you legend
#8
Thanks White Python and J. Sheppard! Going to be finishing the track off today. Have an idea for a sick breakdown bit that would lead into a killer solo!

I like this man, it reminds me of the style I was composing in for a previous band I was in that ended unfortunately since I wanted to get away from the guitar (was trying to find it to show you but seems I've lost it!).

It's interesting, I was at the 12 Bar in London last night and was listening in on a conversation these 2 guys were having (I believe one of them was a tour manager for some band), and they were saying how clean singing and screaming in metal are starting to become less popular and that a more 'shouty' approach is starting to make a come back.

I could imagine if you got a singer like that guy who's now in Gallows (former Alexisonfire singer), they would be able to do something incredible with your song man.

Thanks again guys, very much appreciated!
#9
Sorry for the delay in response! My ear drum ruptured, and had me down and out for almost 2 weeks. Anyways, here goes!

Digging the intro! It has a very grunge-esque vibe, and the backing synth effects fit perfect.
Fucking love the vocals, you've got the perfect growl for this, and the melodies of the vocals fit great over all of the riffs. The chorus is catchy as hell. Catchy, catchy, catchy. The ambient/clean area is almost reminiscent of The Cult, and transitions perfectly into that last chorus, and again into the clean outro. Honeslty, this is one of the best songs I've heard on UG, especially being one with vocals. Keep churning out music like this, and you're gonna have a shitload of fans!

#10
Dude, no problem at all! Take it easy with your ears though man. Our most precious body part.

Thanks so much for the compliments, I might be angry when I sing but you just brought a huge smile to my face!
#12
Aw man, you're awesome!

I'll be sure to post up on here with links to the band when we're 'officially released'. It's a secret project currently until we've recorded everything professionally and are ready to start getting out there.

Thanks again man