Poll: the sad aesthetic
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View poll results: the sad aesthetic
:y:
4 27%
:n:
3 20%
:confused:
3 20%
;)
5 33%
Voters: 15.
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#1
Quote by JustRooster in a different thread
I'm over the whole 'sadboi' thing, man. The cringe is too real.

~



let's talk about personal aesthetics. there's this thing going around tumblr where people will tag posts with "my aesthetic". for example, in typical tumblr fashion, this might be tagged with it:



what they mean is that the image or whatever exudes a certain broad style, one that they attempt to exude themselves. the style may involve anything from mannerisms to clothing to bad bokeh and the sentiment may be sincere or ironic. like, for example, recently i described a music video featuring men injuring themselves skateboarding to be "my aesthetic". that's about half sincere.

~


i'm not making this thread to discuss an increasingly annoying tumblr trend. i wanna discuss one particular aesthetic that appears on this forum & elsewhere: the sad one. some features include
  • outwardly identifying with slowcore & emo music
  • actively discussing personal despair
  • self-deprecation
  • pouting


a key part of this aesthetic is that it has more to do with identity than with attention-seeking. the sad boy is not necessarily looking for your sympathy, he's just trying to reinterpret his personal failings as an inseparable part of his identity. it's easier to feel like depression is a part of you, something that makes you you, than it is to reject depression as a flaw but nonetheless struggle to overcome it. and the best way to maintain an identity is to express it.

currently i'm handling some identity problems right now (beyond the scope of this forum). i like to take a step back every once in a while and check myself. am i accidentally 'manufacturing' an identity to compensate for something? tough questions. the quote at the top of this post got me rethinking things, ya know?

discuss the sad aesthetic or personal aesthetics in general. there will be a poll
#3
My aesthetic is to not participate in Tumblr trends.

heh

The JustRooster aesthetic is general snobbishness towards people.
Free Ali
Last edited by chrismendiola at Feb 11, 2016,
#4
I only ironically rep sadboyz. My brother seriously did it for a few years.
#7
my aesthetic is not the sad aesthetic. i would say it's the exact opposite of the picture in your post actually


but I have nothing against the sad aesthetic itself


this almost makes me want to start using tumblr again
cat
#8
sad boy, to me, is a lot like fuck boy, but ideologically different


a sad boy is usually too smart to want to be known as a fuck boy. their open vulnerability can look like sincerity and strength (and not macho guy strength but like, personal strength.) it makes them look like less of an asshole when they put others down because you know they're a nice guy and they're just depressed and have better taste so they're bitter or whatever other logic you want to put behind that. it's a very liminal state, which gives it its strength - it gives an insecure person more control over their situation. it's subversive. it works well.

why do I know all this? bc I have the predisposition to be a sad boy, and in turn, have become a magnet for other sad boys throughout my life. I've been better at actively acknowledging it since I've been with my husband (who also has a predisposition towards this, but he looks macho to some folks [deep voice, muscles, dark features, facial hair, lots of tattoos] so it's a weird mix) and he's pointed out, over the years, guy friends who simply took advantage of my relationships with them but presented enough of a 'sincere bond' with me that I perpetuated it. I've had to do the same for him: guys loved using my husband for their own personal gains, under the guise of mutual bonding over anger/sadness. it didn't help that both of us gave many friends access to drugs they wouldn't otherwise be able to get.

I've since grown a distaste for the sad boys in my life, including myself - or at least, I'm no longer impressed by it. but I can still empathize. I don't want it to die completely. it's the part of me that falls in love with anyone who's nice to me - a characteristic that had destroyed parts of my life and made me hatelove those people eventually, but, nevertheless, a characteristic that is also really beautiful when tamed and handled carefully. the sad boy in me is often also the artist in me - he's inspired, in a funny way, and can be productive and creative if I let him be.
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

Last edited by vintage x metal at Feb 12, 2016,
#9
My self depreciation is real even though i present it as a joke lol.

I never listen to emo or slowcore though so im a fake sadboy.
#10
Fuck y'all. I'm great, and my aesthetic is swinging my dong around like a helicopter.
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#12
Quote by snipelfritz
Fuck y'all. I'm great, and my aesthetic is swinging my dong around like a helicopter.

Yeah, this is p much me. I have little use for self-deprecation because it only works when there's a negative aspect of yourself to self-deprecate. I do it jokingly sometimes, but that only adds to my phenomenal persona because the humor of the contradiction is impossible to ignore.
#13
Quote by TheChaz
Yeah, this is p much me. I have little use for self-deprecation because it only works when there's a negative aspect of yourself to self-deprecate. I do it jokingly sometimes, but that only adds to my phenomenal persona because the humor of the contradiction is impossible to ignore.

*smashes flaming brick*

Oh, hi there. Yeah, *sweeps back flowing bangs* sometimes I think I'm too cool.
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#15
i never interpreted the whole S A D B O Y thing to be all that serious. i've always thought of it as a tongue-in-cheek way to describe any sort of melancholy features you might have. maybe i interpreted it wrong though?

as for me, i dunno, i don't think i consciously try to project and sort of "aesthetic" out there. i guess i have a tendency towards self-deprecating humor, and yeah i enjoy all of that emo shit. but i have lots of different interests, and my personality isn't one-dimensional. i don't see why i'd want to confine myself to a singular label. the people who get to know me will figure out for themselves what sort of person i am.

Quote by slipknot5678
My self depreciation is real even though i present it as a joke lol.

i feel like all self-deprecating humor is rooted in true feelings tho
#16
oh way to go, JustRooster, see how your WORDS only DESTROY??
My God, it's full of stars!
#17
Quote by snipelfritz
*smashes flaming brick*

Oh, hi there. Yeah, *sweeps back flowing bangs* sometimes I think I'm too cool.

Sometimes I think I'm not too cool then i remember i am
#18
i think i might be too open with how much i love the emo punx

man i dont wanna be a sad boy

am i a sad boy


piss
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#20
Quote by Primus2112
i think i might be too open with how much i love the emo punx

man i dont wanna be a sad boy

am i a sad boy


piss

Tbh I was blasting Armor for Sleep on my way back from the gym today staring at people as I drove.
#22
aesthetic blogs suck ass but the sad aesthetic is, in my experience, a bunch of genuinely sad kids into emo and /mu/. they were ok

the general trend that pisses me off is the (we'll call them) spunk of hipster kids who reblog Rothko jpegs on there because ~aesthetic~

also MCR aren't and never have been emo
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#23
Quote by EndTheRapture51
the question is are you taking about "emo" music

or

actual emo music




Quote by TheChaz
Tbh I was blasting Armor for Sleep on my way back from the gym today staring at people as I drove.




i sort of did that today but way worse, cute without the e is my fuckin jam lately

i know
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
Last edited by Primus2112 at Feb 12, 2016,
#24
the industry would call MCR jazzcore if they thought it'd sell
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#26
Quote by Eastwinn

a key part of this aesthetic is that it has more to do with identity than with attention-seeking. the sad boy is not necessarily looking for your sympathy, he's just trying to reinterpret his personal failings as an inseparable part of his identity. it's easier to feel like depression is a part of you, something that makes you you, than it is to reject depression as a flaw but nonetheless struggle to overcome it. and the best way to maintain an identity is to express it.

currently i'm handling some identity problems right now (beyond the scope of this forum). i like to take a step back every once in a while and check myself. am i accidentally 'manufacturing' an identity to compensate for something? tough questions. the quote at the top of this post got me rethinking things, ya know?
some of the more interesting things I've read in this forum for a long time. Never really looked at it that way but I find that first paragraph thought provoking.
Si
#27
Quote by TheChaz
Does say anything count as emo? cuz that's also been my jam for the last minute and a half


ehhhh never was a say anything fan but thats definitely emo
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#28
Quote by Primus2112
ehhhh never was a say anything fan but thats definitely emo

tbh I only ever got into their self titled plus a few select songs from ...is a real boy.

It's p great for when yr just tryna listen to some stream of consciousness with a structure pop punk chit.
#30
Quote by The_Blode
I always thought The Used were an emo band...along with Billy Talent...

The_Blode


they are

- rapture -

longing rusted furnace daybreak seventeen benign nine homecoming one freight car
#32
I try not to be too aesthetically sad nowadays as it just feeds my sadness. Especially if I listen to sadcore. I'm slowly getting back to seeing myself as a normal guy whose head happens to be really quite fucked rather than just a total freak. I thrive on a bit of outward sadness but that comes pretty naturally to me if I try not to appear strong and in control, too much sadness spoils the broth.
#34
I think you, as a society and culture, should be worried about how limited and predetermined your options of self-expression are becoming.


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo
#35
S-A-D-B-O-Y-S see me in the club with it tatted on my chest.
"If God exists, there's no way he is French" - Andrea Pirlo

S A D B O Y S
#36
Quote by vintage x metal
sad boy, to me, is a lot like fuck boy, but ideologically different


a sad boy is usually too smart to want to be known as a fuck boy. their open vulnerability can look like sincerity and strength (and not macho guy strength but like, personal strength.) it makes them look like less of an asshole when they put others down because you know they're a nice guy and they're just depressed and have better taste so they're bitter or whatever other logic you want to put behind that. it's a very liminal state, which gives it its strength - it gives an insecure person more control over their situation. it's subversive. it works well.

why do I know all this? bc I have the predisposition to be a sad boy, and in turn, have become a magnet for other sad boys throughout my life. I've been better at actively acknowledging it since I've been with my husband (who also has a predisposition towards this, but he looks macho to some folks [deep voice, muscles, dark features, facial hair, lots of tattoos] so it's a weird mix) and he's pointed out, over the years, guy friends who simply took advantage of my relationships with them but presented enough of a 'sincere bond' with me that I perpetuated it. I've had to do the same for him: guys loved using my husband for their own personal gains, under the guise of mutual bonding over anger/sadness. it didn't help that both of us gave many friends access to drugs they wouldn't otherwise be able to get.

I've since grown a distaste for the sad boys in my life, including myself - or at least, I'm no longer impressed by it. but I can still empathize. I don't want it to die completely. it's the part of me that falls in love with anyone who's nice to me - a characteristic that had destroyed parts of my life and made me hatelove those people eventually, but, nevertheless, a characteristic that is also really beautiful when tamed and handled carefully. the sad boy in me is often also the artist in me - he's inspired, in a funny way, and can be productive and creative if I let him be.


this is a good post

Quote by 20Tigers
some of the more interesting things I've read in this forum for a long time. Never really looked at it that way but I find that first paragraph thought provoking.




Quote by korinaflyingv
I try not to be too aesthetically sad nowadays as it just feeds my sadness. Especially if I listen to sadcore. I'm slowly getting back to seeing myself as a normal guy whose head happens to be really quite fucked rather than just a total freak. I thrive on a bit of outward sadness but that comes pretty naturally to me if I try not to appear strong and in control, too much sadness spoils the broth.


i think control is a big part of it.

Quote by JamSessionFreak
I think you, as a society and culture, should be worried about how limited and predetermined your options of self-expression are becoming.


go on
#38
sorry lads, i stopped precisely cuz i didnt want to go on

started typing out a longer post and deleted it cuz i was being stupid


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo
#39
Quote by JamSessionFreak at #33829177
I think you, as a society and culture, should be worried about how limited and predetermined your options of self-expression are becoming.

w/e fuccboi
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#40
Quote by JamSessionFreak at #33829611
sorry lads, i stopped precisely cuz i didnt want to go on

started typing out a longer post and deleted it cuz i was being stupid

The one time people were interested in you having more to say about the topic you decide not to go on.
Free Ali
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