#1
I am the lump inside my own throat.
I keep myself from speaking.
I am capsizing my own rowboat,
and it wasn't even leaking.

I want to be the buoy that stays afloat.
I'd keep us both from sinking.
I want to surround your castle with my moat.
I'd keep our wealth from shrinking.

We'd sleep in comfort, minds unwinking.

I can't handle my own life, but I want a part in yours.
It's not selfish, it's intuition.
I want to help you more.

I am the plug stopping the drain,
and the water's two months old.
Fuzz is growing up the main,
the light bulb has gone dull.

I want to be the guide to your retreat
I'd show you where to go next.
If you got lost I'd be your feet.
I'd lift the weight off of your chest.

I can't handle my own heart but I want a part in yours.
It's not selfish, it's intuition.
I have no doubt, no indecision.
ok, yeah. my name is silly because I signed up when I was 13.

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#2
The rhymes are too crisp and clean. It reads like 90's rap when the hype man would double up on the words at the end of the lines. It's a good skeleton, needs some more viscera.
OBEY THE MIGHTY SHITKICKER
#3
Quote by JustRooster
The rhymes are too crisp and clean. It reads like 90's rap when the hype man would double up on the words at the end of the lines. It's a good skeleton, needs some more viscera.

Thanks, I appreciate the thought a lot. I tend to focus far too much on making everything smooth and clean. Perfectionist to a flaw. Gotta work on that.
ok, yeah. my name is silly because I signed up when I was 13.

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