#1
"Trump campaign manager charged with simple battery"

Inadvertent or clever?


Provide other examples.
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
#2
2 men take US gov’t ocean science buoy, now want to “sell” it back for $13,000

Theme park bans screaming on new roller coaster

Watership Down: Parents left 'horrified' as Channel 5 airs 'traumatic' film on Easter Sunday

Japan’s retirees turn to crime for a better life in prison

Man ordered to stay away from tree after climbing it and throwing branches like spears at passers-by.

all original content of course
O what a disgrace if such a despised and base race, which worships demons, should conquer a people which has the faith of omnipotent God and is made glorious with the name of Christ!

The music winners listen to
#5
Idk what the headline was but the local newspaper here (and im sure in many other cities) had this pic on the front page last week




and I just burst out laughing
#6
My Windows 10 notification for News shortened it down to "Police charge Trump campaign".
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#7
"Florida senate candidate admits to animal sacrifice, denies goat dismemberment"

"Assault with a deadly weapon: Florida man charged with throwing alligator into Wendy’s"

Both Florida, shocking.
#8
Crack found on governor's daughter
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#9
http://metro.co.uk/2013/08/31/police-thwarted-by-goat-stuck-on-roof-in-gresham-oregon-3944570/

Quote by gonzaw
Yeah. The most recent "funny" (actually sad) that I remember is: "March against fear cancelled due to security threats in Paris"



How many more marches and candlelit vigils do we need really.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
Last edited by ErikLensherr at Mar 30, 2016,
#10
Quote by MeTallIcA313
"Florida senate candidate admits to animal sacrifice, denies goat dismemberment"

"Assault with a deadly weapon: Florida man charged with throwing alligator into Wendy’s"

Both Florida, shocking.

there's a chance I follow this person on Twitter because someone immediately came to mind
Quote by Fat Lard
Why would you spend tens of thousands of dollars to learn about a language you already speak? It was over before it even started dude

Quote by captainsnazz
brot pls
#12
tumblr twitter instagram
Quote by Rossenrot
Aig91 Atomizes Rossenrot Before Offering Mercy In Exchange For Wholesale Genuflection
Last edited by aig91 at Mar 30, 2016,
#13
There was one that went: "Help me find the bastard who shat down my chimney", with the picture of the guy caught in the act, It was an English newspaper (most probably a tabloid), but I loved it...
#15
Quote by Pastafarian96
Crack found on governor's daughter


“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
#16
We have this linguistic themed magazine at work which has a section dedicated to funny headlines. They're all Dutch, but some of them also translate well to English.

One I can remember is:
Patients often die in hospital against their will
#17
Quote by ultimate-slash

Patients often die in hospital against their will


THAT IS AN OUTRAGE!
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#18
Oh, and there was an ad for full body massages:

Painful body treatment - 35€
Unhealthy body treatment - 35€

And an ad for a hotel that said:

Several of the rooms have a balcony with a view of the ocean and a fridge.
Last edited by ultimate-slash at Mar 30, 2016,
#19
Quote by ultimate-slash at #33901813

And an ad for a hotel that said:

Several of the rooms have a balcony with a view of the ocean and a fridge.



#20
Quote by ultimate-slash
Oh, and there was an ad for full body massages:

Painful body treatment - 35€
Unhealthy body treatment - 35€

And an ad for a hotel that said:

Several of the rooms have a balcony with a view of the ocean and a fridge.


I demand more.
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#21
This one is a multiple choice question from some kind of survey:

"You are a man. What do you worry about most when it comes to the Dutch economy?

a) I am a woman
b) Global conflict
c) Purchasing power"

#22
Between these and oversized prawn crackers, I now want to move to Holland again.
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#23
I'm not even sure what they were trying to say here, but:

Campaign demands closure of all closed centers

#25
Side note,

Anyone ever heard of a card game called "Man Bites Dog"? It's where you get to create funny headlines with random cards. Kind of like a family friendly Cards Against Humanity.
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#26
Quote by ultimate-slash
This one is a multiple choice question from some kind of survey:

"You are a man. What do you worry about most when it comes to the Dutch economy?

a) I am a woman
b) Global conflict
c) Purchasing power"




Also I can't recall any headlines that act as double entendre, but I am really enjoying these.
#27
Quote by MHDrunk
2 men take US gov’t ocean science buoy, now want to “sell” it back for $13,000

Theme park bans screaming on new roller coaster

Watership Down: Parents left 'horrified' as Channel 5 airs 'traumatic' film on Easter Sunday

Japan’s retirees turn to crime for a better life in prison

Man ordered to stay away from tree after climbing it and throwing branches like spears at passers-by.

all original content of course

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzirfrSn_KQ

Yes, let your kids watch a movie about rabbits getting gassed Auschwitz style.
#28
Wouldn't call this hilarious but it does show how stupid the English language is:

"Burnley record record profit"
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#30


That's just poor translation, though, and that's a whole different thread.
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#33
It's not even a headline, but I really need to get the picture of my brother in accidental blackface on the internet.

He was supposed to be a hyena in a school play and my dad did an awful job on the makeup. At that point it just looked like bad face paint.

Then his picture was in the local paper and the b/w photo made it look like he was in blackface.

The blank expression on his face makes it even better.
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#35
How about this one?

"Wreckage of World War II Bomber Found on the Moon."

ron666