#1
I'm stuck in mud again
one foot in love again
sticks like toffee on the bit behind your teeth
the grief and gumption shone

she goes meteor immediately before I close the door
she goes meteor immediately before I can close the door

I'm apathetic again
one step ahead again
fingers and curling irons are hot
dead-drop love notes written in chalk
marks on walls where memories were fobbed

I'm stuck in mud again
one foot in love again
spellbound britches knotted in tops
street light amber stretches the fog
over the sky that I bought you

she goes meteor immediately before I close the door
she goes meteor immediately before I can close the door

#2
Love the style, love the words. Could do with a little bit of polishing in terms of syllables - it feels a tad clunky with 'immediately'.

'Dead-drop' judders with me, although is that the point? Fobbed is such a blunt, forceful word to end the verse on.

My favourite line is 'the sky that I bought you', it's outstanding, says so much in such a short space.

Very enjoyable.
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