I'll check out the recording tomorrow (can't right now) - do you have any lyrics to post?
'....even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked...."

Do me a favour, pop into Songwriting & Lyrics and add a comment to one thread, any thread, but contribute.


Well you should have posted the lyrics, its hard to analyze just from memory. Also I'm not sure if that's the whole song or just a sample, again I can't give a good analysis without the whole picture. I'll give you my impressions now, but keep in mind I'm doing it from memory and may or may not have the whole picture. I think your lyrics kinda suck to be honest It just sounds like a murder fantasy you have over some girl who spurned you. The graphic murder you describe has no real redeeming qualities. It's just blood and gore for the sake of blood and gore. Eminem for example, would do the same thing especially in his earlier stuff, but people mostly accepted it because he was funny and incorporated very intricate and unique rhyming schemes. These lyrics are neither funny nor unique to me. Honestly you kind of give off the impression of a sore loser taking petty revenge on some girl because she wouldn't date you. Wimpy, vindictive, cowardly and childish. It's not really the kind of character a listener will care to hear about or want to relate to. Perhaps this girl really did do you wrong, you should tell us what she did to deserve such treatment, it will make you more sympathetic. I'm not trying to put you down, I'm just giving my honest impression of the song. Having said all that, you have a good flow and and the music and rapping itself are pleasing to the ear. If you asked just for my opinion of the sound of the song I would say its excellent, give us some more verses! You have a funky way about you and it's really catchy, I just don't like the lyrics at all.