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#1
"So, What's your name again?"
Quote by Anonymous
My favorite sex position is called "WOW". That's where I flip your MOM over.
#5
I also pooped
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#6
Now we both have AIDS
Quote by DisarmGoliath
Facesitting is a violation of freedom of speech, because how can you speak when you have an ass covering your face?
#7
You're better than your sister
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#8
So... do I pay you now or how does this work
e-married to Jack (bladez)
#9
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#10
I make memes
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#12
I gave it a little smooch
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#15
Ugh, you were stunning.
I memorized every freckle.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#16
Are you in yet?
Quote by Hal-Sephira

We all have the rights to be mad

So does you
#17
See you in 9 months
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#19
Ooops, I dropped my monster condom that I need for my magnum dong.
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#20
You're the third one this week.
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#21
Don't tell mum
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#22
"Okay honey, I'll be home in about 20 minutes"
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: Coltrane


The apple always falls close to the tree, but the tree always falls on the power lines.
#23
Quote by i_lovemetallica
Don't tell, mum
improved
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
Last edited by Banjocal at Sep 3, 2016,
#24
I am 12 and what is this
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#26
Just so you know, that cheque's probably gonna bounce harder than your ass just did.
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#27
This is actually a true story,

On holidays in Italy a few years ago I hooked up with this American chick, we had sex and then afterwards she started crying and said she was really gonna miss me

So that ranks up there.
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#28
Quote by i_lovemetallica
This is actually a true story,

On holidays in Italy a few years ago I hooked up with this American chick, we had sex and then afterwards she started crying and said she was really gonna miss me

So that ranks up there.


while we're telling stories

so I'm with this girl and she's on top facing me and she starts to have major convulsions because she's having an intense orgasm.

and she starts to cry and not like a soft cry but the type where you're dripping mucus and she tells me "sorry but I've never had an orgasm before"
well I've never not came before

Quote by Pastafarian96
I an evety characyer in this story
#29
"Yeah I'm definitely a lesbian/gay"
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#30
First time:

"Wow I didn't think I'd last that long"
"Well... You didn't. Just so you know. But hey you nearly made me cum so well done!"
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#32
*gonzaw wall of text*
My old signature was too long. Have a daisy.

#33
I only like the Netflix part
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#35
What happened to your penis?
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#37
I really wish you hadn't died in that accident
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#38
Quote by i_lovemetallica
I only like the Netflix part


Goddamit..

Quote by Anonymous
My favorite sex position is called "WOW". That's where I flip your MOM over.
#39
Remember, I know where you live
Quote by EndTheRapture51
Anyway I have technically statutory raped #nice

Quote by EndThecRinge51
once a girl and i promised to never leave each other

since that promise was broken

i dont make promises any more
#40
And remember, only tell your friends about the free candy, not the sore arse part.
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