Page 1 of 2
#1
I'm 27 live with my parents, only been on one date, and never had a girlfriend.

I didn't ask a girl out until I was 22. It turned out she was 18 or so and I didn't go out with her because I felt uncofturable about the age difference.

5 years later I somehow got a date on okcupid. Didn't go well she stopped texting me after that date.

Now onto my work life. I graduated college in 2011 with less than average gpa (just like high school). Got a job at a group home. It payed well and I had my own apartment all 3 years I worked there. In 2014 I got fired from there and tried to find another job.

Between 2014 and 2015 I got about 8-10 different jobs. Each one I would quit during the first week because I would get so nervous and overwhelmed. I went to therapy and took medication but it didn't help.

So obviously with no steady income I had to move back in with my parents.

Then in October 2015 I got a low paying job at a dog daycare. It is where I still work there. It's a low paying part time job mostly for high schoolers.

Then in March (I think) I almost killed a dog by giving it too much insulin on accident. Somehow my bosses didn't fire me.

I want to quit but can't because it's the only job I can do without getting too nervous and overwhelmed. So I'm stuck living with my parents.

I'm pretty sure I have threads on almost all of these if your interested.

Forgot to mention that I haven't had a single friend since high school.

Thanks for reading if you did. Don't know why I wanted to share.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#3
Having a fat gf isn't so bad is it?

The drug thing is. Sorry
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#4
Sorry man. What did you major in for college?

Have you tried easing in to meditation? Not drinking as much coffee if you do so might help with some of the nervousness. I've heard some good things about taurine.

Past is the past, you're still young enough to make baby steps towards good change.
.
#5
Quote by mr.retard
Having a fat gf isn't so bad is it?
Having a broken pelvis is though
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: Coltrane


The apple always falls close to the tree, but the tree always falls on the power lines.
#6
Quote by Fat Lard
Sorry man. What did you major in for college?

Have you tried easing in to meditation? Not drinking as much coffee if you do so might help with some of the nervousness. I've heard some good things about taurine.

Past is the past, you're still young enough to make baby steps towards good change.


Secondary education but I didn't get my license to teach just a degree in the foundations of education which is basically just saying I know the basics of education.

Never thought about mediation. Will look into it. I somewhat recently stopped caffeine. Not sure if it helps but it can't hurt. Not sure what taurine is I will look into it as well.

Thanks for all the advice.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
Last edited by mr.retard at Sep 17, 2016,
#7
Join the army.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#8
Taurine is just the stuff in Red Bull lol.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#10
mr. retard


lol

and you're not a failure if you managed to graduate both highschool AND college
that puts you at the top of the world serious!
many many many thousands of people don't even get that opportunity

and don't call yourself a "loser" when you're a fully functional human being with his limbs still attached and an above average IQ
really dont...
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers
There shall be a stop to this madness. The battle is not over. My tasty licks aren't going anywhere.

Quote by The_Blode
^ I've just realised if you say Simple Plan's 2011 effort "Get Your Heart On!" really fast in a Southern American accent, it sounds gross. . .like sexual gross!

Quote by Necroheadbanger
Hello.
I'm looking for professional bongo-ists and triangle-ists to make a Progressive Technical Brutal Death Metal band
(will be called AxOxJxLxAxIxVxXxUxWxZxQxUxRxWxGxJxSxAxLxKxMxNxHxUxGxAxAxWxVxCxBxZxVx)
(Don't even ask what it means)


https://soundcloud.com/95dank



#11
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#12
Get a gym membership, change your hairstyle, and buy a motorcycle.
#13
Sorry man. You are just going through a rough patch, you are not a failure. I.e the things you did or didn't do don't reduce your own personhood to "failure". Why?
  • It's not "failure" to live with your parents, specially if you are having a tough time financially. You already said you were living on your own and were independent and things were going ok. It's ok to rely on people that love you when you have problems, so you can more easily recover. Would you feel as bad if you were living with a friend? If not, what's the difference? They are just people that care about you and let you crash at their place so you don't freeze to death outside
  • It's not "failure" to never have had a girlfriend or going out on few dates. That's just our western culture focusing so much on "getting laid", or "get a girl and settle down". There is nothing inherent to the act of having a girlfriend that says that you are a failure if you never had one. If you recognize that you want to get dates and the like, improve yourself and keep working to try and get one. But it's not a failure if you don't.
  • Regarding the nervousness with jobs, that sucks man. However, if it's a problem with your body/mind it's not a "failure" either, you can work to try and make it better. Go to therapy, maybe a psychologist too, and work it out. If you need emotional support to try and better yourself don't be afraid to ask.
  • I remember the insulin dog thing. It was an unfortunate accident where you didn't take enough precautions. It's good that you recognized your mistake, but if it's a "failure" it's only one which you need to learn of. You now know to always check twice before doing something that has the potential to be a threat to another living being.


Cheer up


EDIT: +1 to the gym membership. Or just go out for a run every couple of days.

Try to improve yourself. As your confidence/personality/body/etc improves, friends/dates/success/etc will soon follow. Get in better shape, start reading more (fiction literature, philosophy, etc), try researching some topics you are interested in and get involved in them, etc
Last edited by gonzaw at Sep 17, 2016,
#15
Quote by behind_you
Why did you get fired from your first job, if you don't mind me asking


Damn I was hoping no one would ask. But along with depression and anxiety I have some anger issues.

One of the clients at the group home was having a behavior and she was screaming so loud and hitting me repeatly. So eventually I lost my temper and hit them.

There is something about a person screaming that just angers me so much and to top it off she was hitting me over and over again.

Long story short I confessed to a co-worker and with mandatory reporting she told corporate and I got fired.

So yeah there's another horrible thing I did. I obviously don't feel good about that.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#16
Hey guys thanks for all the advice. It's hard to reply to all of you but I appreciate your help. I plan on doing a lot of what you say.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#17
Quote by mr.retard
Damn I was hoping no one would ask. But along with depression and anxiety I have some anger issues.

One of the clients at the group home was having a behavior and she was screaming so loud and hitting me repeatly. So eventually I lost my temper and hit them.

There is something about a person screaming that just angers me so much and to top it off she was hitting me over and over again.

Long story short I confessed to a co-worker and with mandatory reporting she told corporate and I got fired.

So yeah there's another horrible thing I did. I obviously don't feel good about that.


>feeling bad about Standing Your Ground

sounds like it worked out in the end if that job was lame, eh?
.
#18
Quote by Fat Lard
>feeling bad about Standing Your Ground

sounds like it worked out in the end if that job was lame, eh?


Not really standing my ground. They didn't hit very hard. It was just annoying as heck.

But yeah it was for the best. It's just taking a long time to recover from losing that job.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#19


I don't have any good advice, but I hope you find confidence, love yourself, and live the life you deserve.
“Just to sum up: I would do various things very quickly.” - Donald Trump
#20
Quote by mr.retard
Damn I was hoping no one would ask. But along with depression and anxiety I have some anger issues.

One of the clients at the group home was having a behavior and she was screaming so loud and hitting me repeatly. So eventually I lost my temper and hit them.

There is something about a person screaming that just angers me so much and to top it off she was hitting me over and over again.

Long story short I confessed to a co-worker and with mandatory reporting she told corporate and I got fired.

So yeah there's another horrible thing I did. I obviously don't feel good about that.


Maybe you can be an MMA fighter.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#21
Hey man it'll be alright. Everyone's got some problems and has road bumps along the way. Be kind to yourself
My God, it's full of stars!
#22
Quote by mr.retard
Secondary education but I didn't get my license to teach just a degree in the foundations of education which is basically just saying I know the basics of education.

Never thought about mediation. Will look into it. I somewhat recently stopped caffeine. Not sure if it helps but it can't hurt. Not sure what taurine is I will look into it as well.

Thanks for all the advice.


How would it be possible to apply and work towards licensing/certification for teaching? Seeing as you have the foundation, is there any ""CLEP" way to accelerate towards doing that?
.
#23
Quote by mr.retard
I'm 27 live with my parents, only been on one date, and never had a girlfriend.
If it makes you feel better, I'm 25 and am almost there myself. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Forgot to mention that I haven't had a single friend since high school.
Same. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I know it's pretty easy to just look back and regret stuff, and this is a little hypocritical of me to say, but don't let that define who you could be. You can be happy, you just gotta live for the day.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#24
the unconscious doesn't like negative mantras. But plasticity/change is a possible route.
.
#25
I'm 22 and live with my parents. Never been on a date. Just started college.

Life's p good actually.

If you don't don't like something about yourself you have the power to change it. I've always found it comforting how mutable the self is.

If you feel like you're stuck, then you have to do something to change your situation. Make a series of small goals toward a bigger goal. You can get there.
#26
living with your parents isn't inherently a bad thing. i'd argue that you'd be a failure if you were in this current situation, but living on your own. it makes more sense financially, and having the social contact is huge. i've lived with my parents (and my sister and her family) for the past two years and it's been great. I haven't made any friends and it's just really nice to be able to see people every day that I know i get along with. no one's family is perfect, but it sounds like you have a pretty ok relationship with your parents if they're cool living with you.

i'm still several semesters away from getting a GED, i have no idea what i want to do for a career. i had a job that i enjoyed for the most part, but it was reliant on me being a good student. I had four straight semesters of only F's, maybe one C. There were two different instances where i woke up ready to go to work and just couldn't get out of bed because anxiety/depression/etc so i missed several weeks of work, but i couldn't bring myself to even tell my boss. so i just didn't show up for two weeks. idk how i didn't get fired.

there was a girl that i dated for a while. only girl i've ever dated. took her on probably seven dates or something. went to a museum, had a lunch together, went to a comedy show, went to the cinema, etc. i never held her hand. just got too scared. we got on really well but i just didn't do anything to propel the relationship. and that's ok. i haven't been on any dates since, that was three years ago.

i don't have a job now, i'm taking calculus for the fifth time, the last friend i made was my sister's husband, i live with my parents, and i spend most of my time during the day playing video games with my brother and doing jigsaw puzzles. by most/all cultural/societal standards i am a failure. but i know i'm not. it's just over 18 months since my suicide attempt, i'm stable, i'm on meds, i'm seeing a therapist. when i wake up in the morning i don't scream into my pillow and cry anymore. if i have a bad day i'm able to just tell people that i'm having an off day and i don't worry about it. i'd like to get further in life but i also know that i can't get ahead of myself. i've got a different pace than other people and that's ok.

i don't want to say some crap thing like "just choose to be happy" or "here's a miracle fix that will save you" or "everything will be ok" because none of those are totally possible and they're not encouraging. i can say that life, as i define it at least, is measured by experiences, not by salaries or notches in the belt. so you by no means are a failure because you've had totally unique experiences that no one else can claim to have had.

so here's a hug
it's all just coming back
it's all coming back

it's all coming back to me
#27
I'm 26 and I still live at home. Although that's because my home life is sound and I'd rather live here and save to buy a house than rent somewhere.

But still, as jobs go, up until March I was still working part time in a supermarket nearly 4 years after graduating from uni and I was starting to fear that I'd never find a job in the field I studied, felt like a proper loser. 6 months on and I have a new job and have already made loads of progress in it. Don't beat yourself up thinking youre a failure, you can change your circumstances, just work towards it steadily.

Also I remember the insulin story. How did that pan out?
The plan was to drink until the pain over.
But what's worse, the pain or the hangover?
Who am I? I'm a titan so be expectin' a clash.
#28
you are just having a rough road at the moment. different people have different struggles.

i have had drug/alcohol problems most of my life. i have been on blackouts lasting several weeks, woke up across the state not knowing where i was. etc.

i have attempted (and failed) suicide three times. amazing how 90 xanax's didn't kill me, parents found me, called 911, got my stomach pumped and all sorts of shit like that. that was when i was 17. i have OD'd several times, i got lucky.

i am addicted to self harm. its a constant thing i struggle with.

i am mentally hospitalized on a regular basis, never for less than a week or two. i did one 28 day stint.

i do have a good supportive family, and i am happily with my girlfriend, we have been together for a long time. so thats good.
WTLT 2014 GG&A

Quote by andersondb7
alright "king of the guitar forum"


Quote by trashedlostfdup
nope i am "GOD of the guitar forum" i think that fits me better.


Quote by andersondb7
youre just being a jerk man.



****** NEW NEW NEW!
2017-07-07 2017-07-07 Update and a Chat On Noise Constraints *** NEW FRIDAY 7/7
2017-04-13 RUN AWAY from COMPUTERS!!! TCE? RANT ALERT!!!
2017-03-02 - Guitar Philosophy 1001- Be Prepared For the Situation (Thursday 2017-03-02)
2017-02-21 How to Hot-Rod the Hell of your Stratocaster for $50! (Tuesday 2017-2-21)
Resentments and Rambling from a Guitar Junkie
---> http://trashedengineering.blogspot.com/
#29
Don't really have anything to say to that but
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#30
Sorry to hear what's going on with you, but you're not a failure, because you want to have a job and be independent. It's a tough time but it doesn't make you a failure. Failures are bums who don't even try.
#31
Quote by mr.retard
Having a fat gf isn't so bad is it?

The drug thing is. Sorry

I was being jocular, but it was actually a lot worse than I thought it would be.
And yeah the drug thing sucks. I haven't touched anything in 5 months but I still have a bunch of mental health issues from it that may never go away. And I know if I have so much as one drink I'll end up back in the cycle and eventually in a mental institution.
Quote by Fat Lard

Have you tried easing in to meditation?

Do this. It will help more than you can possibly imagine. I meditate twice a day, usually about 30 minutes in total, and my life is so much better as a result. I get nervous and overwhelmed a lot of the time as well and it really helps with that.
#33
I'm 25 and in a similar situation. I don't have any advice to give but I'd just like to say how much I appreciate the kind and helpful replies in this thread.
The way I see it, we are not alone, and if other people can make it out of this hole, so can we.
#34
It could be worse you could still be emo in 2016

longing rusted furnace daybreak seventeen benign nine homecoming one freight car
#35
Quote by korinaflyingv
Fixed. Every time she went on top I was scared of sustaining a terrible injury.
Okay that is substantially worse.
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: Coltrane


The apple always falls close to the tree, but the tree always falls on the power lines.
#36
I remember that vet thread
Quote by zgr0826
My culture is worthless and absolutely inferior to the almighty Leaf.


Quote by JustRooster
I incurred the wrath of the Association of White Knights. Specifically the Parent's Basement branch of service.
#37
Quote by Fat Lard
How would it be possible to apply and work towards licensing/certification for teaching? Seeing as you have the foundation, is there any ""CLEP" way to accelerate towards doing that?


Those are good ideas but teaching isn't something I want to do. I spent 4 years in college working in classrooms at schools. Didn't like it.
#38
Quote by SMH07
I'm 26 and I still live at home. Although that's because my home life is sound and I'd rather live here and save to buy a house than rent somewhere.

But still, as jobs go, up until March I was still working part time in a supermarket nearly 4 years after graduating from uni and I was starting to fear that I'd never find a job in the field I studied, felt like a proper loser. 6 months on and I have a new job and have already made loads of progress in it. Don't beat yourself up thinking youre a failure, you can change your circumstances, just work towards it steadily.

Also I remember the insulin story. How did that pan out?
it turned out all right. The dog didn't die and better in a couple of days. I also didn't get fired and my business didn't get sued.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#39
Quote by trashedlostfdup
you are just having a rough road at the moment. different people have different struggles.

i have had drug/alcohol problems most of my life. i have been on blackouts lasting several weeks, woke up across the state not knowing where i was. etc.

i have attempted (and failed) suicide three times. amazing how 90 xanax's didn't kill me, parents found me, called 911, got my stomach pumped and all sorts of shit like that. that was when i was 17. i have OD'd several times, i got lucky.

i am addicted to self harm. its a constant thing i struggle with.

i am mentally hospitalized on a regular basis, never for less than a week or two. i did one 28 day stint.

i do have a good supportive family, and i am happily with my girlfriend, we have been together for a long time. so thats good.
I don't have most of those problems and I'm sorry you do.

I do also have a problem with self harm. It's hard to deal with.
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
#40
Quote by korinaflyingv


Do this. It will help more than you can possibly imagine. I meditate twice a day, usually about 30 minutes in total, and my life is so much better as a result. I get nervous and overwhelmed a lot of the time as well and it really helps with that.
where does one start?
I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given.
Page 1 of 2