So I've been playing for around 3 years, and for the last year or two, I've been working with metronomes, playing to tracks etc. and I enrolled on a music course at college and we were all split up and had to play a couple songs as a band. So we started, and the dummer stopped and told me that I was out of time and I didn't even notice, he was polite and patient with me, but I was just shocked to be told how horrednous my timing is (my words, not his). So I went home, thinking it may had been just nerves, I set up my DAW and metronme, set the click track to about 100 BPM and played it to what sounded in time, went to hear the playback and sure enough, the drummer was right, I was so out of time.

The problem seems to be that even when I play to a metronome I think I am playing fine when I am really out of time. I don't know whar went wrong or how I fix this timing horror.

Tl;dr My timing is out and I didn't realise, how do I fix it when I can't hear that my timing is off until I play it back?
If you can't hear the problem yourself then you need a teacher.
Actually called Mark!

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The key is to listen to other instruments while you play. Many beginners tend to focus on their own playing too much and block out what's going on around them. You need to move past looking down at you instrument the entire time - notice how all the best bands make eye-contact, give cues through body language, etc. Certainly metronomes help - but it's ultimately about grooving with other musicians. It takes time for sure. Just take as many opportunities to jam with other musicians as much as possible, even if it's just one-on-one, and not just drummers but other guitar players, bass players, keyboardists, singers, etc. It's the next big step in playing your instrument.
It helps to tap your foot, sway your body, nod your head ... all physical reinforcement. You really do need to listen what's happening around you (even if that's only a metronome) ... and remember nerves (eveh recording yourself) can throw your timing out, so don't beat yourself up too much. Practice mentally relaxing as you're observing the rhythm.
When practising with the metronome try not to wait for the beat as a cue to play. If you are doing it right, you probably won't hear the click.
Recording and practising, as you did, can be good but try to work out why exactly it is out.

Plus what the others are saying.