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#1
I don't know how I get myself into these situations...but anyway I started doing friends with benefits a few months ago. Did it a few times actually because there were no decent girls around to date that I liked.

Met this girl really liked her. She told me she was married after meeting her. Anyway decided to continue as we really hit it off. We both have a few friends with benefits and she told me she would stop all hers but I didn't have to. Told me she had feelings as did I. I wasn't bothered about the other girls so I just saw her. Had one of the best times I've had with her. We really connected.

So a few months down and she asks her hubby for a temp separation. He moved out. She basically married the guy for security as her first guy was actually gay and used her as a cover and never had any spark and feels we have everything she never had.

So husband is still out staying elsewhere, but she's terrified to make the separation permanent due to her insecurities and also her daughter would be upset. She's terrified that I'd cheat due to how we met but she knows im not some player I always wanted relationships. She initially wanted to decide at the end of the year but she wanted to make me feel comfortable that i wasn't just being used.

So the husband is looking to come around and have a discussion regarding saving the marriage. She doesn't have the heart to tell him I never loved you etc and I needed a crutch. She's trying to avoid him. In the meantime we still feel the same. She's been really stressed kicking the guy out as together for 6 years. I told her that if she went back with him I'd probably still see her but may date others as you can't really go back.

So in the meantime she's still been on a dating site with her profile for friends with benefits. She said her friend uses it. She has been on it briefly each time. I got a friend to catch her out and she had some general banter but admitted she was married but looking for friends with benefits. Bearing in mind she had a few guys before she was seeing and stopped them (i know this as ive seen her constantly). All I know is she is very insecure, terrified if she chooses me it won't work out and she'll need a fallback. She had no reason to initially cancel her friends with benefits as i wouldnt have asked.

So do I either leave her be and tell her no.
Say you know where I am if you decide
Give a bit of timeout
Raise the issue with her after she's ended her marriage finally.
Get friends to try and catch her out again fully
Say nothing and think if she's going to use me well I can too and im loving every minute of it anyway.


Tldr a married girl I met for friends with benefits now I love has separated from hubby because of me. potentially about to leave him. In the meantime has still been chatting on dating site but not arranging to meet guys.
Last edited by AndersM1 at Oct 2, 2016,
#2
You should go and ask on the relationship thread

longing rusted furnace daybreak seventeen benign nine homecoming one freight car

bring back UG classic
#3
How do you know you're not going to be another crutch for her?
Quote by Renka
OddOneOut is an Essex S&M mistress and not a pirate or a computer program.

#4
Christ almighty I'm not touching this one.


...ok fine, might as well since I read all that.

First of all, let's just go ahead and assume you're aware that having a fwb relationship with a married woman (with a daughter, on top of that. Geez) was wrong on both ends.

Now, if I were you, I'd take into consideration not just who makes who happy, but what's best for her and her daughter, too. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if you're ready to be the man who breaks a marriage apart and jump in place as family man. That means supporting her and her daughter (whom I hope you never tell how you two met) emotionally and financially. It's a tall order for someone who didn't work themselves into it. Ask yourself if you're what these people need in their life.

If you really care about her, tell her to make her desicion based on both these factors. I feel like not being responsible with these decisions is what got her in this situation to begin with.
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Last edited by Joshua Garcia at Oct 2, 2016,
#5
At one point she cared about the guy to actually marry him, and have a kid (assuming the kid is his and hers). Then she wasn't into it anymore. You came along and brushed her off her feet, even though she's married... Now she cares about you. But maybe later on, she won't. If it were me, I wouldn't continue with her.
#6
As someone who formerly did a lot of fwb stuff

Matey you have gotten yourself way too far into something that could go so very wrong and pretty much has in many ways
Married women, no matter how unhappy, are not fair game unless their husband says so, that involves legal shit 9/10 times
Her going on dating sites and, more importantly, fucking you while she is married is enough of a warning bell that perhaps even though her marriage isn't really functional that perhaps she won't be faithful to you
#7
Quote by Mr E Meat
this is your brain

this is your brain on RT

Quote by Standard_A440
Given that you reside in the shade of the natural light of reason, I will defer doing your homework to you.
#9
She just sounds like a ho.
Quote by EpiExplorer
I swear this guy in particular writes for the telegraph or some shit.

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#10
Cut all ties, never talk to her again. Possibly go and move into some obscure third world country to make sure that she can never find you. Getting serious with her sounds like it would be a ridiculously bad move.
I have nothing important to say
#11
What the fuck.

You are actually asking if you should stay with someone who:

- Marries a homosexual so he can hide the fact that he is gay.
- Marries, lives with for 6 years and has a daughter with a second guy who she doesn't actually love.
- Cheats on her husband with multiple people she met online.
- Uses a dating site while already sleeping with at least two other people.

Have I got all that right?

Even if everything she has told you is 100% truthful which is a big fucking leap of faith, you should stay as far as possible from people like this.
#12
Quote by Joshua Garcia
First of all, let's just go ahead and assume you're aware that having a fwb relationship with a married woman (with a daughter, on top of that. Geez) was wrong on both ends.


The phrasing here confused me for a second.
Quote by Hal-Sephira

We all have the rights to be mad

So does you
#13
Quote by ErikLensherr
She just sounds like a ho.


this

don't get yourself involved with married women
and i don't understand how you can "love" someone who is already married to another dude... wtf
Quote by Pizzafan
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#16
Quote by Ssargentslayer
holy shit that's a mess. Just run
i think this qualifies as a hot mess.

do what id do and cut off all contact. stop using fb and never answer your phone.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#18
Quote by Ssargentslayer
jakesmellspoodelete fb, lawyer up, hit the gymquit your job

closer to what id do.

except id be looking for a pro bono lawyer and theyd probably be the caliber of Charlie Kelly's uncle.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#19
Quote by Random3
What the fuck.

You are actually asking if you should stay with someone who:

- Marries a homosexual so he can hide the fact that he is gay.
- Marries, lives with for 6 years and has a daughter with a second guy who she doesn't actually love.
- Cheats on her husband with multiple people she met online.
- Uses a dating site while already sleeping with at least two other people.

Have I got all that right?

Even if everything she has told you is 100% truthful which is a big fucking leap of faith, you should stay as far as possible from people like this.


different strokes eh
#20
congratulations, you played yourself
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#22
Quote by mattedbird
wow, sounds like she's into fitness.


fitness dick in her mouth ayyy
Quote by yellowfrizbee
What does a girl have to do to get it in the butt thats all I ever wanted from you. Why, Ace? Why? I clean my asshole every night hoping and wishing and it never happens.
Bitches be Crazy.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
#24
Quote by AndersM1



Tldr a married girl I met for friends with benefits now I love has separated from hubby because of me. potentially about to leave him. In the meantime has still been chatting on dating site but not arranging to meet guys.


well, if it makes you feel any better, I doubt it's because of you....btw, you should be on the dating sites if you want fwb
Last edited by mattedbird at Oct 2, 2016,
#25
Quote by AndersM1
I don't know how I get myself into these situations...but anyway I started doing friends with benefits a few months ago. Did it a few times actually because there were no decent girls around to date that I liked.

Met this girl really liked her. She told me she was married after meeting her. Anyway decided to continue as we really hit it off. We both have a few friends with benefits and she told me she would stop all hers but I didn't have to. Told me she had feelings as did I. I wasn't bothered about the other girls so I just saw her. Had one of the best times I've had with her. We really connected.

So a few months down and she asks her hubby for a temp separation. He moved out. She basically married the guy for security as her first guy was actually gay and used her as a cover and never had any spark and feels we have everything she never had.

So husband is still out staying elsewhere, but she's terrified to make the separation permanent due to her insecurities and also her daughter would be upset. She's terrified that I'd cheat due to how we met but she knows im not some player I always wanted relationships. She initially wanted to decide at the end of the year but she wanted to make me feel comfortable that i wasn't just being used.

So the husband is looking to come around and have a discussion regarding saving the marriage. She doesn't have the heart to tell him I never loved you etc and I needed a crutch. She's trying to avoid him. In the meantime we still feel the same. She's been really stressed kicking the guy out as together for 6 years. I told her that if she went back with him I'd probably still see her but may date others as you can't really go back.

So in the meantime she's still been on a dating site with her profile for friends with benefits. She said her friend uses it. She has been on it briefly each time. I got a friend to catch her out and she had some general banter but admitted she was married but looking for friends with benefits. Bearing in mind she had a few guys before she was seeing and stopped them (i know this as ive seen her constantly). All I know is she is very insecure, terrified if she chooses me it won't work out and she'll need a fallback. She had no reason to initially cancel her friends with benefits as i wouldnt have asked.

So do I either leave her be and tell her no.
Say you know where I am if you decide
Give a bit of timeout
Raise the issue with her after she's ended her marriage finally.
Get friends to try and catch her out again fully
Say nothing and think if she's going to use me well I can too and im loving every minute of it anyway.


Tldr a married girl I met for friends with benefits now I love has separated from hubby because of me. potentially about to leave him. In the meantime has still been chatting on dating site but not arranging to meet guys.



#Humblebrag
Quote by TheSennaj
And well yes, I'll enjoy the carpal tunnel and tendonitis, because trying to get one is clearly smarter than any word you have spoken thus far.
#26
She's a cheater. You know she's a cheater. There is no future with a person like that.
#28
Quote by Joshua Garcia
Christ almighty I'm not touching this one.


...ok fine, might as well since I read all that.

First of all, let's just go ahead and assume you're aware that having a fwb relationship with a married woman (with a daughter, on top of that. Geez) was wrong on both ends.

Now, if I were you, I'd take into consideration not just who makes who happy, but what's best for her and her daughter, too. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if you're ready to be the man who breaks a marriage apart and jump in place as family man. That means supporting her and her daughter (whom I hope you never tell how you two met) emotionally and financially. It's a tall order for someone who didn't work themselves into it. Ask yourself if you're what these people need in their life.

If you really care about her, tell her to make her desicion based on both these factors. I feel like not being responsible with these decisions is what got her in this situation to begin with.


Liar, you did touch it.

As to the OP, I have never seen so many fucking RED FLAGS in my life.
I mean holy shit.

Run don't walk away from this space cadet/whore/whack job.
This bitch is gonna end up doing the same thing to you as she did to her husband.
#29
So today she told her husband she wanted a divorce and things would not change. She also told me she was terrified of me cheating but she took the bait and gave my catfish profile her kik email. I'm yet to find if she will arrange a meet but she is talking to multiple guys on the dating site. Also she organized a vacation for us haha.

If I say now she will walk anyway. I feel like just using her for sex and getting another girlfriend.
#30
So today she told her husband she wanted a divorce and things would not change. She also told me she was terrified of me cheating but she took the bait and gave me her kik email. I'm yet to find if she will arrange a meet but she is talking to multiple guys on the dating site. Also she organized a vacation for us haha.

If I say now she will walk anyway. I feel like just using her for sex and getting another girlfriend.
#31
Starting a relationship with someone who has a prolific history of cheating and who leads someone on in a relationship far enough to get married for seven years and have a child together is not a great idea. It speaks volumes how little you trust her since you're currently trying to bait her online using a fake profile right now.
Last edited by chrismendiola at Oct 2, 2016,
#33
She arranged to meet the catfish profile and said she's shagged multiple guys since me one yesterday. I'm just going to move on
#34
lool. Get tested.
Quote by EpiExplorer
I swear this guy in particular writes for the telegraph or some shit.

Quote by Fat Lard
My name can actually be traced back to as early as the 1990s, it means "fuck off data miner"
#36
Now I'm just so curious she leaves her husband so she says for me..she also had former fuckbuddies throwing themselves at her saying they loved her.

Anyone good at psychology? I'd generally like to find out what this trauma is all about. She frigging met my family etc lol.
#37
Quote by AndersM1
I feel like just using her for sex and getting another girlfriend.


That seems like a great plan as long as you don't get caught. Also, get lots of condoms.
-BUBBA-
#38
The meteor will solve all of this. Extinction of all life.
Last edited by geo-rage at Oct 3, 2016,
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