#1
It's strange how your fears
change as you grow up.
When I was a child,
It was the monster in the basement.
pit, pat, pit, pat, pit, pat
As I outran him up the steps,
He never caught me,
probably cause of my super fast shoes.

Then middle school,
and my fear was Josh
He never even had to hit me
first I was too fat,
then my backpack was the wrong color,
then I dressed up for picture day.
The bruises never showed,
so i never looked tough.

High School.
I met a girl,
nothing to be scared of here

College.
If she leaves,
I don't know what I'll do.
Drinkings not even, like, a problem until you're 30
Everyone likes me here,
more than she does anyway.
I mean, what's not to love,
everyone should love me.
I'm gonna live forever,
who needs to be afraid of death?

27.
She left.
Houston, we have a problem.
pit-tsh-pat-tsh-pit-tsh-pat-tsh
As I drag my feet across the floor
to the man that writes my checks.
Why be afraid of death?
I used to be afraid of basements in the dark,
but now they don't hold a candle
to the man that's in the mirror,
in my bedroom
in the light.