#1
She wrapped her arms around him, as if she knew him for a lifetime,
just a couple of hours after he began grabbing her legs.
She had that Suicide Girls style that he found so unappealing,
but an easygoing vernacular that worded sentences like sex.
Smoking topless, as if in the comfort of her own sheets,
with the shamelessness of an actress and the stance of a model,
she apparently took a liking on that clumsy little stand-in,
like a customer getting lost on a tablecloth in a brothel.

He held back his stimulation, trying to embroil that tension
for as long as the mutual heat became uncontrollable for both.
He didn’t want to win her over with a silly seduction game,
just for her to dress the cheapest so he could freely rip her clothes,
as he kept looking for a go sign; for some hunger in her stare;
for her body language to mimic a predator with an appetite.
With no experience in acting, he would gladly play the prey part;
either content with being a meal or a miserable bite.

Underneath seventeen spotlights, they were both breaking in sweat,
unsure if it was the hard-on or the overcrowded warmth.
Among the other hands on her, her pores only felt his fingers
send a trigger up her spine that they could fuck away the swarm.
Just leave her alone with him in this sultry warehouse; leave the lights;
leave the scaffold; leave the cameras; let them haunt this spot for ages.
She would liven up the structure, perspire the entire color
spectrum in paint, and project it while arching her body in blazes.

Their last breath rippled like Hiroshima in August '45,
only not with a bang, but with a long drone harmony,
and all the paint was melted; all electricity was drained;
the stage became inflatable, deflating with their fervency;
the PVC covered their ashes, as if it was nestling these burst
elementals whose restlessness couldn’t be contained;
and all that was left was this ugly industrial ruin
as the landmark of a chemistry forever to be retained.
#2
you did a good job writing this. you weave loads of simile/metaphor very well into the literal parameters of the situation. i particularly like: "but an easygoing vernacular that worded sentences like sex", "send a trigger up her spine that they could fuck away the swarm.", "smoking topless". the way you have the constantly contrasting attraction and repulsion is also executed well.

the only thing i'm wondering about is the other people mentioned in the setting ("among the other hands on her"), not to mention the setting itself. it seems to me to either be some kind of hidden club scene, a pornography studio, or something along those lines. that being said, the level of detail here is still incredible.
#3
Thank you !

I wanted the whole thing to be sexually tense, mysterious and surreal. So the whole situation is kind of dropped in hints here and there. But, since you basically saw what I was going for, I was imagining the setting in a studio of sorts.

I'm gonna read your latest piece today.