#2
sledgehammer and bone saw
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#3
Pretend you're gay
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers
There shall be a stop to this madness. The battle is not over. My tasty licks aren't going anywhere.

Quote by The_Blode
^ I've just realised if you say Simple Plan's 2011 effort "Get Your Heart On!" really fast in a Southern American accent, it sounds gross. . .like sexual gross!

Quote by Necroheadbanger
Hello.
I'm looking for professional bongo-ists and triangle-ists to make a Progressive Technical Brutal Death Metal band
(will be called AxOxJxLxAxIxVxXxUxWxZxQxUxRxWxGxJxSxAxLxKxMxNxHxUxGxAxAxWxVxCxBxZxVx)
(Don't even ask what it means)


https://soundcloud.com/95dank



#4
Just start ignoring them a little bit and then just gradually never speak to them again
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#6
Had a friend break up with me once, it was weird. I would have preferred if he just stopped hanging out with me.
"Social correctness has traditionally had nothing whatever to do with reason, logic, or physics. In fact, in England it is generally considered socially incorrect to know stuff or think about things."
-Douglas Adams
#8
Any particular reason as to why?
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#10
Quote by chrismendiola
Dude on the right is eating invisible ass.

Lmao, and shes like "woah, no thanks"
Quote by Mr E Meat
this is your brain

this is your brain on RT

Quote by Standard_A440
Given that you reside in the shade of the natural light of reason, I will defer doing your homework to you.
#11
This might be a little expensive but it's always effect.

Just fake your own death and move to a new city.
They can't stop us Let 'em try For heavy metal We will die!
#12
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#13
mood





#14
Quote by Pastafarian96
Just start ignoring them a little bit and then just gradually never speak to them again


Yeah, how is this a question? I do it by accident sometimes.
OBEY THE MIGHTY SHITKICKER
#16
Would have been a better topic if it was "How to Break Wind With a Friend".
#17
Your approach depends on how close you were to said friend and whether or not you're a pussy.

Not close: just stop hanging out with them
Somewhat close: can also stop hanging out with them, or just start telling them you're busy every time they ask you to hang out.
Pretty close: let them know the issues and give them a chance to fix it. if it's unfixable, let them know that it's better for you to part ways

If you're not a pussy, you can just let them know upfront for anyone that you can consider a friend.

I've broken up with friends a couple of times. Most of the times people take it pretty well when you're upfront with them. Of course, if it comes out of the blue and they think that you're both butt buddies they'll probably take it differently. If you've already decided you want to break up with them, you've probably already started distancing yourself though so they'll notice. I've still hung out with friends (same party or whatever) I've "broken up" with, it's not awkward at all. Sometimes they'll even thank you because it let them know about issues about themselves that people don't want to tell them about or they never bothered to get around to fixing without a wake up call.

Of course, this can backfire you if you make friends with crazy people or overly emotional people, or if they're backstabbers. Keep in mind what type of person they are before going the upfront route.
Last edited by thevwu at Jan 30, 2017,
#18
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#20
fuck a close relative of theirs.
Quote by element4433
One time I watched a dog lick his own dick for twenty minutes.

Quote by Roc8995
No.


Well, technically it could be done, but only in the same way that you could change a cat into a hamburger. It's an unpleasant process, and nobody is happy with the result.
#21
Feed them their parents.
Dance in the moonlight my old friend twilight


Quote by metal4eva_22
What's this about ****ing corpses? My UG senses were tingling.
#23
Quote by rocknroll93
fuck a close relative of theirs.
Can confirm, I've seen this happen and it works. The girl also had a huge Xbox Live debt because of him.

Though I guess they eventually got around to talking again and now there's no bad blood.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#24
start banging them and then one of you decide you don't want to do that anymore and then stop hanging out because it's kind of awkward and then stop talking as much and then lose your friend
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
#25
Quote by slapsymcdougal
Take their mother out for a nice seafood dinner and then NEVER CALL HER AGAIN.

#savage
#26
A few options:

1. Come to the UG Pit and ask for advice on how to break up with a friend

2. Be mature about it, post a scathing rant about them on Facebook then un-freind them: follow up by not answering texts, phone calls, or the door should they come knocking!

3. Just be honest and tell them why you no longer want to be friends, if you have the courage, if not see #2
"A well-wound coil is a well-wound coil regardless if it's wound with professional equipment, or if somebody's great-grandmother winds it to an old French recipe with Napoleon's modified coffee grinder and chops off the wire after a mile with an antique guillotine!"
- Bill Lawrence

Come and be with me
Live my twisted dream
Pro devoted pledge
Time for primal concrete sledge

#27
just stop talking to them that's pretty much how i lost all my friends
#28
Show them your post history.
Dance in the moonlight my old friend twilight


Quote by metal4eva_22
What's this about ****ing corpses? My UG senses were tingling.
#29
Quote by kalypto
just stop talking to them that's pretty much how i lost all my friends
a few people said this already, but yeah. it's what i do all the time. about 50% unintentional, too.

the upside is, if you wish to reconnect later on, you can make a facebook post like:

"i'm jakesmells p and i'm back from the dead
chilling in my room, lying on my bed"
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#30
Quote by Joshua Garcia
Any particular reason as to why?
this question needs answering god DAMN IT OP FUCKIN ANSWER
Click here to hear my BOB DYLAN (Blowing in the Wind) out right now May 2k17
#31
take him to the riverbank and shoot him like in Mice of Men
"ba doo doo ba doo doo ba doo daa"
- earth,wind, and fire