#1
Hello m8s.

So, like a year ago already I made a thread like this in another forum, and it got lots of replies, and then I got banned for reasons that aren't important...

Well, I had many good laughs with the comments in that thread and I want to see if any of you guys got anything funny to tell.

So, here goes 2 things that happened:

First one, was at "El Grito", it's a highschool bands/solo musicians contest, where students participate and a jury selects the best ones and give them a recording contract, yeah, very cool!

So, there was this guy, like 15 or 16 years old probably, I don't remember what he did before doing what I'm going to tell you, but for the last song (everyone has 3 songs), he grabbed an electric guitar (clean) and started to play "Crimen" by Gustavo Cerati (a legend of rock in Spanish). The song has some barre chords but it's basically easy, nothing out of this world. Well, the guy misses the first chord making the sound a dying animal would make, he's like 5 seconds to change to the next chord, and once he starts singing he's terribly out of tune, and it was like that THE WHOLE SONG!... I don't know if he was extremely nervous or he just started playing guitar a week ago, but damn dude, you must practice before going on stage!

And this is another one. There was this event where various bands and artists were playing in a public space, it's called "Costanera", it's basically a tourism place, a large street, lots of green space, various parks, football stadiums, restaurants, lots of cool stuff, usually like 30.000 people goes there daily, and in a weekend it's usually full of people. Well, so, most of the bands where just random cover bands, but then somebody puts a backing track that sounds like those things you would hear in a TV show about some teenager girl who sings... Yeah. So, a girl, around 17 and 21 years old I guess comes to the stage, grabs the mic and starts singing some sad stuff. Everything was ok (I was like "dafuq is dis" tho), but in some moment in the middle of the song the girl starts crying, but she doesn't stop singing, and I was like "WTF is happening now?", and she started to cried louder, then I couldn't hold it anymore, I was laughing like a damn maniac, everyone was like "this guy is a sick fuck!", but seriously, it was ridiculous.

Well, nothing too funny but that's it hehe. So, any of you got any funny thing to tell?
How does this thing Works ??!?!
#3
roly poly pit
It didn't take long to realise
The safest place was not her arms, but her eyes
Where she can't see you
For her gaze, it blisters;
Grey skin to cinders
#4
I was playing a gig on Holloween (one of the biggest nights of the year for drunk college kids) several years ago and a fight from a bar down the street made its way down the sidewalk and went to the ground right outside the door to the bar where I was playing. There was, almost immediately, blood all over the sidewalk and doorstep. I played this bar regularly, so I kind of thought of the place as my bar, and the bar's cook lived upstairs, so we were both pretty offended by this shit was being brought to our door. So I put my guitar down mid-song and the cook and I ran out the door, pulled the two guys apart, fended off a girlfriend who was too drunk to tell we weren't joining the fight, and shouted and swore at everyone watching until they left. Then I ran back in, grabbed my guitar, and finished my set.
Death to Ovation haters!
#6
Did some meth between sets.
Was so wired, I couldn't play worth a shit.
So at the next break, I did some heroin to even things out.

HAHAHAHA, yeah that's so funny.

I wouldn't recommend that though.
(And yes, that's a true story)
Last edited by CodeMonk at May 11, 2017,
#7
I was watching a local cover band and some super drunk college kid came up to me and started pointing at his face. Eventually he slurred out,
"You, you, you look like Curt Cobain." (I had long, flowing blonde hair at the time.)
Then he said, "Should I, should I grow it man?"
I was like, "Go for it dude."
"All my friends are like no, don't but should I?"
"Yeah man."
"You wan't me to, you want a beer man?"
"No thanks"
#9
Quote by Mean Mr Mustard
Getting free beer is always fun

that isnt weird or funny u jerk
27mMoV31II7.a2
#10
That time a girl in high heels and a mini skirt started a mosh pit at that Psychostick concert. That was pretty hilarious.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#11
As a spectator - had a pint of piss thrown in my direction, but luckily two tall guys were stood behind me, so it hit them. Can't really think of anything weirder than that.

At a gig I've played - almost blinded our drummer when he dropped a stick - I picked it up and threw it back to him (somehow without missing a beat), but it took him by surprise and he just managed to duck out of the way. Turns out he threw it on purpose because he broke it.

So yeah, nothing too weird. Guess I'm kind of boring.
WHOMP

Think of that next time you are not allowed to laugh.
#12
Playing - I got a handjob

Watching - two
- someone recognised me and made me play a song in the middle of their set
- a really drunk girl tried to get on stage at a gig and the bass player on stage went to try and get her as she climbed up to guide her off stage but she didn't quite make it and fell backwards and let out a noise I cannot think about without laughing
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#13
Quote by Pastafarian96
Playing - I got a handjob 

Elaborate
I like St. Anger. Ridicule me, daddy

Quote by ErikLensherr

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
#14
Quote by zgr0826
Elaborate

I played a rather promiscuous seeming girl's favourite song with a friend and she gave me a sub-par handjob that frankly didn't end quick enough
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#15
Quote by zgr0826
Elaborate

Someone wanked him off.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#16
Quote by Pastafarian96
I played a rather promiscuous seeming girl's favourite song with a friend and she gave me a sub-par handjob that frankly didn't end quick enough

Like, were you standing onstage facing the audience?
I like St. Anger. Ridicule me, daddy

Quote by ErikLensherr

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
#17
Quote by zgr0826
Like, were you standing onstage facing the audience?

Side of stage, if there had been light on us, someone probably would've seen
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#18
Quote by Pastafarian96
Side of stage, if there had been light on us, someone probably would've seen

You absolute madman.
I like St. Anger. Ridicule me, daddy

Quote by ErikLensherr

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
#19
Quote by zgr0826
You absolute madman.

She was rather forward and a little bit scary honestly

I just went with it because, hey, didn't have to try to get a woman to touch my penis
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day