lesbians claim not to like penises yet still sometimes pleasure themselves with dildo's which are conveniently shaped like penises

checkmate lesbians 
youve got em on the ropes now sonny
Eat your pheasant
Drink your wine
Your days are numbered, bourgeois swine!
same reason gay guys say they don't like vaginas but sometimes pleasure themselves with other guys buttholes which are pretty much like vaginas

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson