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#1
Whilst I understand it doesn't help the case that that ho Fiorina (republican attemptor) majored in medievel times and philosophy, it still makes me wonder:

Why do we gloss over hundreds of years of history and know nothing about them? But honestly?

...

I'm reading Dante Aligheri's wiki at the moment, but a few months or so ago, I found Olde Englishe people's archived mails from the 1400's odd (odd as in they sounded pretty damn smart after it was translated into nu English, tho they be petty plots).

What are the Iluminati trying to hide from us? ...Magick?


.
#2
Like, they throw that God-awful book Canterbury Tales at us in high school, and we're just supposed to be like, alright whatever, it was chain mail smelting and whatever ..... ?
.
#3
They're called the Dark Ages because we know very little about them compared to other time periods.
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#4
School taught me the roman empires cultural existence, not the expansion, and the the collapse leading into the dark ages. Learned about Charlemagne, his benefit to society, but not his expansion, and that was basically it.

Everything else I learned was from video games and then reading about it on wikipedia. The only thing we hear about Medieval times in popular culture is the wars and rebellions, but not the social constructs of the time period. Crusader Kings 2 pretty much taught me everything I needed to know about the time period by looking up time periods on google afterwards.
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
Last edited by Nelshizzle at Jul 10, 2017,
#5
just play The Witcher videogames
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#6
They were called the Dark Ages because of the Dark Wizards who ruled the lands and the seas. They were banished from the realm for hundreds of years by the Order led by Merlin; this marked the start of Renaissance. Unfortunately, they found a way to break the dimensional barrier sometime around 1930-40; not even Hitler could stop them. These immortal wizards are still alive today but they rule from the shadows instead of openly like in the Dark Ages. They invented the Internet and the heavy metal, as well as lots of other evil but undeniably useful things.
WHAT A
HORRIBLE
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CURSE.
#7
Just watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Or go to a renaissance fair. You can get yourself a bomb ass turkey leg on the cheap!
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#8
I actually know a decent amount about certain elements of the period, so speak for yourself


and in the 1400s they most likely wouldn't be speaking old english. it would be middle english, nerd
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#9
Basically, a lot of that shit was made uncool during the renaissance and later in the enlightenment; medieval people were nowhere near as backward as they're often portrayed. I mean, they knew to wash their goddamn hands but people in later periods decided washing hands was dumb so their infant mortality skyrocketed. 

i mean, the anglo-saxons had a higher literacy rate than most developed countries for a while. half the shit we have from way back when exists because medieval people realized it was worth something and made sure to copy it down

I'm not a huge chaucer fan, but the canterbury tales is actually pretty sweet when all the fun isn't sucked out of it. it's full of sexual humor and other weird jokes
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Why would you spend tens of thousands of dollars to learn about a language you already speak? It was over before it even started dude

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brot pls
Last edited by BladeSlinger at Jul 10, 2017,
#10
Because it is the current year
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#11
Also, we don't bother because there is a massive glut of information in our current time. Something along the lines of 80% of data that exists now was created in the last 10 years, we're struggling so much to keep up with that that we ain't got time for history.

EDIT: Actually, I lie, I checked again and its now estimated that 90% of data that exists in the world now was created in the last 2 years.........
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
Last edited by i_lovemetallica at Jul 10, 2017,
#12
I just finished reading marco polos travels last week
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#13
Quote by Wolfinator-x
They're called the Dark Ages because we know very little about them compared to other time periods.


They're called the Dark Ages because the Unholy Roman Empire of Hell (UREH for short) was at its evilest in those days. They literally explicitly charged people money to not go to hell. Satan and Jesus were in business together and they set a standard for organized crime that will never be paralleled.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#14
Quote by BladeSlinger
Basically, a lot of that shit was made uncool during the renaissance and later in the enlightenment; medieval people were nowhere near as backward as they're often portrayed. I mean, they knew to wash their goddamn hands but people in later periods decided washing hands was dumb so their infant mortality skyrocketed. 

i mean, the anglo-saxons had a higher literacy rate than most developed countries for a while. half the shit we have from way back when exists because medieval people realized it was worth something and made sure to copy it down

I'm not a huge chaucer fan, but the canterbury tales is actually pretty sweet when all the fun isn't sucked out of it. it's full of sexual humor and other weird jokes


So what you're telling me is the Anglo-Saxons had it all right until the 11th century when King Cunt the Great came along and runed it.
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#15
Quote by theguitarist
I just finished reading marco polos travels last week

Only another 800 years of History to catch up on
Come back if you want to
And remember who you are
‘Cause there's nothing here for you my dear
And everything must pass
#17
Once the Western Roman Empire collapsed who even gaf.
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#18
Quote by Wolfinator-x
They're called the Dark Ages because we know very little about them compared to other time periods.

oh so thats why i thought it was because it was dark all the time 
#19
Generally, calling that period of time 'the dark ages' is frowned upon.

A more accurate term would be something like "the age of western european regression" considering the byzantine empire did relatively well for itself up until the rise of islam. I think it's the most interesting time period to study because it's the most well documented case of the modern view of civilization taking a step backwards and taking several centuries to recover. The only other recorded example we have of something like that is the bronze age collapse (some people call it the 'greek dark age').
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#21
I definitely fuck with the Byzantines.

Heraclius' reconquest of the Eastern provinces from the Sassanids hmu
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#22
Quote by Wolfinator-x
They're called the Dark Ages because we know very little about them compared to other time periods.
I mean that term is typically used nowadays for the first half of the medieval period when there's a particular scarcity of written records, but certainly in England there's an improvement in that respect pretty much from the Norman conquest onwards which is why we regard that as the beginning of time, and I'm sure other parts of Europe have it earlier, like from the time of Charlemagne inventing Germany and France.

Really these days it's not so much that we don't know very much about it it's just the conventions of teaching and learning history that limit what we learn about it. I mean it's obvious in America - no country cares about teaching anyone else's history except the classical era civilisations that we traditionally see ourselves as taking after, so why would American schools want to teach kids about Europoors who didn't believe in liberty?
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#23
Quote by Wolfinator-x
They're called the Dark Ages because we know very little about them compared to other time periodsAct

Actually they're called the Dark Ages, because it was a time of many petty wars/battles and very little progress in any aspect of society or technology.

Started out as a history major .... until I realized there are no jobs for people with history majors ....  
Last edited by Xander_X at Jul 10, 2017,
#24
jfc lardo, I'm in a coffee shop and you go and post that shit?
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#25
Boring time period, next
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#27
To be fair, the closest one is in a city 5 hours from here and I'm over eating chicken with my hands and drinking something they call mead but is really just Budweiser. Cool battles though:





I'd totes be Princess Catalina's knight in shining armor tho. She'd get the lance for sure. 
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#28
I'm 12 and I still listen Gregorian chant, I was born in the wrong millennium, lol, like if you're listening in 2017!
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The safest place was not her arms, but her eyes
Where she can't see you
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#31
Overall I'm noticing an attempt to erase European history and especially bloody conflicts from EU schools, as it is uncool for say the French and Germans to learn that they were at each other's throats for so many centuries, it is bad for EU unity.
For the most par US schools teach US history and the superiority of the American "race", which makes for some of the most twisted views of World history, especially WWI and WWII is all propaganda.

Anyway...check out Bocacio "Decameron" and Francois Villon, some of my favorites from that era.
#32
Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
To be fair, the closest one is in a city 5 hours from here and I'm over eating chicken with my hands and drinking something they call mead but is really just Budweiser. Cool battles though:





I'd totes be Princess Catalina's knight in shining armor tho. She'd get the lance for sure. 


They have an Armored Combat team about 45 minutes from me. Thought about going to watch sometimes.
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#33
Quote by theogonia777
They have an Armored Combat team about 45 minutes from me.  Thought about going to watch sometimes.

I mean you could but it is kind of shit tbh.


If you go on your b-day you get a crown tho
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#34
Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
I mean you could but it is kind of shit tbh.


If you go on your b-day you get a crown tho


Fuck. That was last Monday.
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#35
Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
I mean you could but it is kind of shit tbh.


If you go on your b-day you get a crown tho


Wait, do yours just do one-one or do they do the 16x16 melees?
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#36
Quote by theogonia777
Fuck.  That was last Monday.

Tbf they probably don't even check your ID.


Like they're probably just happy somebody actually showed up. 


Quote by theogonia777
Wait, do yours just do one-one or do they do the 16x16 melees?


They do a storyline thing. So there is a variety of things that happen. Duels, Jousting, big battles etc...
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Last edited by H4T3BR33D3R at Jul 10, 2017,
#37
I fucking love going to Medieval Times.
It's trashy good fun.

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#38
Quote by theogonia777
So what you're telling me is the Anglo-Saxons had it all right until the 11th century when King Cunt the Great came along and runed it.

As usual, you can blame the French. 


but for real, calling it the "dark ages" is pretty frowned upon by people who study that time period. It was labeled that after the fact, most likely due to a superiority complex. It was definitely a violent time by our standards, but it's not like the renaissance and enlightenment were straight up improvements. In many was, a lot of our social issues now weren't near as bad during the medieval period (in some places) compared to later eras. Gender was much more fluid, women could actually hold high ranking positions in society and could participate in more stuff than they could later, and some of the medical practices were much better. The resurgence of greek and roman literature is what brought back a lot of the stuff we see as dumb or backwards. It was assumed that greco-roman culture was superior than british or continental bodies of knowledge, so the latter were pushed aside. Shit like washing your hands

so there was a collapse and a level of regression, but people continued to do their thing. It just became more localized instead of widespread/imperialistic
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Why would you spend tens of thousands of dollars to learn about a language you already speak? It was over before it even started dude

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brot pls
#39
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Wrong.

They ran out of candles.

Wrong.

They made candles out of sebum because they didn't take baths
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#40
Quote by Xander_X
Actually they're called the Dark Ages, because it was a time of many petty wars/battles and very little progress in any aspect of society or technology. 
While that's true about the reason the term exists, I think nowadays it tends to find more (though pretty limited overall) use in the other sense, as we've come to decide that the idea of the medieval era as an age of stagnation isn't entirely fair. Like definitely technological progress was slower than in the centuries that followed but probably not substantially slower than in the classical era; likewise the level of violence can be contrasted with the centuries western Europe spent under Roman rule but not really with the classical era as a whole, nor with the first few centuries of the modern era. The main real regression (unless you're a libertarian, I guess) is the very local level on which societies tended to organise between the fall of the Western Roman Empire and the development of modern nations over the course of the early modern era.

Basically it was shit but it wasn't as shit as those having their whole "Age of Enlightenment" thing thought. I would say the main thing that characterises the medieval era in contrast to what came before and after is the relatively decentralised structure of most societies in Europe during that time which yeah ultimately did contribute to a general lack of what we'd call progress but I think that people who weren't in landed dynasties probably didn't have such a sense of their place in history as we do of ours or as the Romans and Greeks did of theirs anyway.

I dunno but yeah anyway the "dark ages" these days I think tends to refer to centuries that were too boring to write about anything other than kings being called Egbert and Aethelfuck so all we really know about them is that a bunch of kings who didn't have much impact on history had funny names. And again this very much depends where you are in Europe* because when England was still busy having funny names but pretty much fuck all else there were vikings in some places and Charlemagne in others but some of these were interesting enough to write about once Christians had taught everyone about Jesus and Writing Things Down.

*Or the world I guess but "medieval" and "dark ages" don't really mean anything in relation to the rest of the world.

Quote by theogonia777
So what you're telling me is the Anglo-Saxons had it all right until the 11th century when King Cunt the Great came along and runed it.
this remains a funny post the second time around

Quote by BladeSlinger
As usual, you can blame the French. 


but for real, calling it the "dark ages" is pretty frowned upon by people who study that time period. It was labeled that after the fact, most likely due to a superiority complex. It was definitely a violent time by our standards, but it's not like the renaissance and enlightenment were straight up improvements. In many was, a lot of our social issues now weren't near as bad during the medieval period (in some places) compared to later eras. Gender was much more fluid, women could actually hold high ranking positions in society and could participate in more stuff than they could later, and some of the medical practices were much better. The resurgence of greek and roman literature is what brought back a lot of the stuff we see as dumb or backwards. It was assumed that greco-roman culture was superior than british or continental bodies of knowledge, so the latter were pushed aside. Shit like washing your hands

so there was a collapse and a level of regression, but people continued to do their thing. It just became more localized instead of widespread/imperialistic
i guess all the things i said are mostly things that you said first
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Last edited by K33nbl4d3 at Jul 10, 2017,
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