Say a sentence you'd say at a guitar store that you could also say during secks

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#4
Look. Mirror threads are lame. But when you make a mirror thread of your own thread?
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#7
Quote by theogonia777
Look. Mirror threads are lame. But when you make a mirror thread of your own thread?

Twice the threads twice the amount of banter to read whilst we're at work
#8
I got off work 2 hours ago though.

You're trying too hard.

>_>
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#10
put it on the insane setting 
#14
I'm gonna bend this bitch
A poem.
Quote by yoman297
no girl, movember isnt for you. shave your stache pls

I can out-bore you any day
#17
stop talking to me
Check out my band Disturbed
#21
Do you have to play the tambourine right now? 
"I definitely don’t write all my music in a blackout, like I used to, although I did come up with some good stuff in a blackout."
-Matt Fucking Pike
#22
I wonder how well this thing takes my Way Huge Swollen Pickle.
Quote by Axelfox
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
I also have to do that. Cottaging this weekend
#24
Employee :

"this Gibson here was made in 1999"

Me:

"wow, it's 18 years old? I'd love to finger it"
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers
There shall be a stop to this madness. The battle is not over. My tasty licks aren't going anywhere.

Quote by The_Blode
^ I've just realised if you say Simple Plan's 2011 effort "Get Your Heart On!" really fast in a Southern American accent, it sounds gross. . .like sexual gross!

Quote by Necroheadbanger
Hello.
I'm looking for professional bongo-ists and triangle-ists to make a Progressive Technical Brutal Death Metal band
(will be called AxOxJxLxAxIxVxXxUxWxZxQxUxRxWxGxJxSxAxLxKxMxNxHxUxGxAxAxWxVxCxBxZxVx)
(Don't even ask what it means)


https://soundcloud.com/95dank



#25
i'm just looking. i don't actually have any money.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#26
"Excuse me, could you redirect me to the library?"

"Violin is better"

"No, it's okay, don't order a talkbox, I'll just order one online"
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: Coltrane


The apple always falls close to the tree, but the tree always falls on the power lines.
#27
I'd be more comfortable trying this without all of these people watching.
"A well-wound coil is a well-wound coil regardless if it's wound with professional equipment, or if somebody's great-grandmother winds it to an old French recipe with Napoleon's modified coffee grinder and chops off the wire after a mile with an antique guillotine!"
- Bill Lawrence

Come and be with me
Live my twisted dream
Pro devoted pledge
Time for primal concrete sledge

#28
"Hold my beer"
"Your sound is in your hands as much as anything. It's the way you pick, and the way you hold the guitar, more than it is the amp or the guitar you use." -- Stevie Ray Vaughan

"Anybody can play. The note is only 20 percent. The attitude of the motherfucker who plays it is 80 percent." -- Miles Davis

Guthrie on tone: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmohdG9lLqY
#30
You really haven't lived until you felt the pleasure of me bending your G-string, 
and plugging my Way Huge Swollen Pickle into your Brown Eye.
Last edited by davidyanity at Jul 13, 2017,
#32
Quote by davidyanity
You really haven't lived until you felt the pleasure of plugging your Way Huge Swollen Pickle into her Muff Pi!


Quote by Axelfox
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
I also have to do that. Cottaging this weekend
#33
Quote by davidyanity
You really haven't lived until you felt the pleasure of plugging your Way Huge Swollen Pickle into her Muff Pi!
i own the pickle and i used to own the muff and i can guarantee you'd have to be a dumbass to say this at a guitar store

come to think of it you'd have to be a fucking dumbass to say it during sex too

even if you adjusted it so as to suggest on some level that you were talking about the person you were shagging

there really isn't a good excuse to say such a thing
Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
Youre officially uber shit now.

Quote by StewieSwan
3d9310rd is far more upset than i 

Quote by Bladez22
I'm a moron tho apparently and everyone should listen to you oh wise pretentious one
#34
Quote by T00DEEPBLUE

The audience at your band's last show. 

But seriously...I made a few improvements to my comment above. 
#35
Quote by davidyanity
The audience at your band's last show. 

Sick burn. I'm not even in a band.
Quote by davidyanity
But seriously...I made a few improvements to my comment above.  

 It still steals the joke I made in an earlier post but makes it incredibly unfunny.
Quote by Axelfox
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Quote by H4T3BR33D3R
I also have to do that. Cottaging this weekend
#38
Quote by T00DEEPBLUE
Sick burn. I'm not even in a band.

 It still steals the joke I made in an earlier post but makes it incredibly unfunny.

Sorry to hear that.

To each their own.  What would be funny to you may not be funny to others...and vice versa.  

It all depends on what floats your proverbial boat.
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