#1
I'm reposting this because I was told to.

(Verse 1)
I don?t wanna be
Part of a letdown
Part of a dull sound
I want to try to escape
From the
expectations
Of civilization
I don?t wanna march in place
I?m told to fit
Into a mold
And a story told
Over and over again
You have to be
What?s expected
To be accepted
To be a man among men

(Chorus)
Does anyone know how came to be
Why is it personal preference
That determines what we believe
It?s just a substitute at best
Is there anything worth trying
Anything worth sinning for
Is living worth dieing
When we have to leave this world

(Verse 2)
People bite
The hand of the feeder
And follow the leader
With the most power and wealth
We?re told to be
Part of what once was
Do something just because
It?s done by everyone else
They say you have to
Fall into line
Believe in a lie
But that doesn?t make it hard
To become
Another clone
Believe only what?s known
And just to fake the part

(Bridge)
Not wanting to let life pass us by
We grab on tight and close our eyes
We?re at full speed; We can?t stop
Tending towards chaos
Something tells us this isn?t right
This isn?t reality; this isn?t life
Everyone?s oblivious or so it seems
And everything inside of you screams
#2
Sounds great! I like it. Is it just a poem or an actual song? If it's a song, send it to me. I'd really love to hear it.
#3
Several reasons I can't do that: 1.) It's not recorded onto my computer. 2.) I can't sing.

I will send you the little riff for it so you can get an idea of how it sounds. It's really simple, actually.
#5
(Verse 1)
I don?t wanna be
Part of a letdown
Part of a dull sound
I want to try to escape
From the
expectations
Of civilization
I don?t wanna march in place
I?m told to fit
Into a mold
And a story told
Over and over again
You have to be
What?s expected
To be accepted
To be a man among men

While this verse seems simply written , you managed to keep it good and kept me reading on.

(Chorus)
Does anyone know how came to be
Why is it personal preference
That determines what we believe
It?s just a substitute at best
Is there anything worth trying
Anything worth sinning for
Is living worth dieing
When we have to leave this world

I really like the chorus. I think you could maybe reword it a little better, because it seems a little jumbled to me.

(Verse 2)
People bite
The hand of the feeder
And follow the leader
With the most power and wealth
We?re told to be
Part of what once was
Do something just because
It?s done by everyone else
They say you have to
Fall into line
Believe in a lie
But that doesn?t make it hard
To become
Another clone
Believe only what?s known
And just to fake the part

Really good, actually great. Flowed beautifuly and I enjoyed your ryhming.

(Bridge)
Not wanting to let life pass us by
We grab on tight and close our eyes
We?re at full speed; We can?t stop
Tending towards chaos
Something tells us this isn?t right
This isn?t reality; this isn?t life
Everyone?s oblivious or so it seems
And everything inside of you screams

Nice, but nothing way to special.

I give this a 8/10. You switch from a simple writing style into a more complex writing style with grace, I enjoy that. Fit a title to it though, If you can write a good song, you can probley get a half decent title. Good job. Hope to read more.
The Devil may.
#6
thank you for reposting this... you are one of the few people that actually stick with what people tell 'em, mostly they leave after final yells at them. way to be. anyway, i'll get to this tomarrow, i'm rather tired now.
#7
"I?m told to fit
Into a mold
And a story told
Over and over again
You have to be
What?s expected
To be accepted
To be a man among men"

This is good stuff. How old are you man?