ok so this is my very first written lyrics. iv only managed to do the first verse and chorus so far. its i rock song sorta like an acdc style.i started it today because my perents dont have faith in me. just wondering what you guys think about it. any comments on improvment will be very appreiciative.

Verse 1

seemes like im goin insane,
they didnt hear what i had to play
n`sais wasting time on dreams is a killer
but i say wasted talent is sicker

Can`t you hear?
don`t you listen?

Dreams arnt a sin,
you are my next of kin,
dreams arnt a sin
and if i dont try i will never win
so just believe, in me
believe, in me

verse 2
They thought i was playing games
playing on my 6 string through whole day`s
spending all my money on new sounds
but if you wanna hear it the ud better come around coz


Dreams arnt a sin
They cant hear
Dreams arnt sin
They wont listen
(probably fade out, not sure yet)

wot do u think?

My gear:
Ibanez S470
Roland cube 30
Boss PW-10 v-wah
Marshall jackhammer
Its coming along really well, a some sections are difficult to relate to, can't wait to hear the finished product.
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thats a pretty decent song..
all you need to do is clean it up a little (well the verses)
the chorus is good, stik wit it..
yea thats it i guess