#1
A song/poem i wrote a while ago, i dont really know what im going to do with it yet so tell me what you think. i'll repay all crits. thanks!


Good morning sunshine

You are the light of morning
That glows so brilliantly
To out-flicker the stars we have no use for
And I, I am pretending to be night
To satisfy my obsession with darkness
So when you remember me,
Remember the moon
That has no purpose than to follow
And you?ll feel at home in the clouds once more
When I think of you
I?ll picture the happiness
In each day you bring
And the innocence infront of you
A product of your incinerating shine
And I?ll be grateful you have more questions than can be answered
I?ll thank the stars I?m always a step behind
#2
Great poem, I really liked it. Its good that you have written a happy song, a lot of the stuff around now is un-happy music. Different but very good.

Keep it up.
#1 Member of the "I've-been-in-a-mosh-pit-and-lived" club pm outside.ice to join.

Emo Defender#8!!!pm emokidsdelirium to join

Since were all in the pit, why don't we mosh?
#3
i think it sounds great!
i dont no if u could say it was happy??
depends which way u take it i guess!
but keep up the good work!
Quote by MarchOfEternity
Oh, and azza, you're a pretty good writer! Graybass is a god amongst men and you're turning real quick to be his new messiah lol.

Quote by graybass_20x6
You're doing good, mate.

Keep up the good work.

I'll take A for $500, Alex.
#4
it's kinda cliched and cheesy... but I freaking love it. I'm a sucker for cute love stuff like this. haha, really

yeah so anyway, this piece is really great. Nobody could ever say no to you if you showed them this!
Quote by Kensai
Maybe you've heard what the ladies say: "Once you go 77mm you don't go back"
#5
Thanks. outside.ice, do you have anything you want me to look at? i'll get to your new piece jallas.

(haha aaron.)
#6
To out-flicker the stars we have no use for

this song is PRETTY and NICE and HEART-FREAKIN-WARMING!!

liiiiiiiiike it. Sound like it should be a song, with just an acoustic geeta, strumming away to the song's pretty brilliance....
xxx
Quote by calvinthecanadi
I'm now an official Franzaholic.


Meep is a word.
Use it.