#1
This is a new song I wrote called 'Innocent'...I really don't know where I came up with the lyrics..I was listening to a lot of Boston, Creedance Clearwater Revival, and Red Hot Chili Peppers..The meaning?..well make your own meaning...


Innocent

There's a time for hate and a time for love
But you're the only one I'm thinking of
You picked me up and then you set me free
Now the only thing I want to be with you...

Miralce or just a magic trick?
Take them both before you have to pick
Pressure's on, running out of time
Infinite, but I'll stand in line for you...

Hold my hand
And sing a song
Give me a kiss
And I'll sing along
Hold me close
In the rain
Whisper to me
And I will stay with you...

You're in my mind and you're in my heart
But I lost them both right from the start
Now my mind is blank and my heart is numb
But I could make it without anyone but you...

I can see beyond the rising sun
And I have felt the pain of everyone
Different, well is that a crime?
Innocent, but I'll do the time for you...

Hold my hand
And sing a song
Give me a kiss
And I'll sing along
Hold me close
In the rain
Whisper to me
And I will stay with you...

Take it off if you want to stay
Take it all and then run away
Feeling like I've got a new tattoo
I'm running wild, don't know what to do for you...

Progression leads to the perfect note
And agression leads to a bloody throat
Please come now before I fall
Please come now or not at all and you...

-Matthew Daly

Copyright Foreplay Music 2006
"Peace, Love, and Stadium Arcadium"
#4
Hey man great song! I'll try a full crit for ya

Innocent

There's a time for hate and a time for love
But you're the only one I'm thinking of
You picked me up and then you set me free
Now the only thing I want to be with you...
Tight first stanza, maybe a little cliched, but tight none the less, it gets the point across nicely sets the tone for the song

Miralce or just a magic trick?
Take them both before you have to pick
Pressure's on, running out of time
Infinite, but I'll stand in line for you...
love this one, it seems so original. That first line is awesome and I dont know why, I love it when that happens!

Hold my hand
And sing a song
Give me a kiss
And I'll sing along
Hold me close
In the rain
Whisper to me
And I will stay with you...
I'm guessing this is the chorus. I like this there is one little bit, and this is really picky, but "Hold me close;In the rain" I dunno it doesnt seem to flow as well as the rest. I think you need another word in there, maybe "Hold me close;Here in the rain"? I dunno other than that really good

You're in my mind and you're in my heart
But I lost them both right from the start
Now my mind is blank and my heart is numb
But I could make it without anyone but you...
Again reall like this, really tight just like the rest

I can see beyond the rising sun
And I have felt the pain of everyone
Different, well is that a crime?
Innocent, but I'll do the time for you...
This is probably my favourite part of the song, it just seems more, i dunno, emotive or something, and the fact that it is so original.

Hold my hand
And sing a song
Give me a kiss
And I'll sing along
Hold me close
In the rain
Whisper to me
And I will stay with you...

Take it off if you want to stay
Take it all and then run away
Feeling like I've got a new tattoo
I'm running wild, don't know what to do for you...
Not a big fan of this stanza especiall the tattoo line it just isnt as tight as the rese of the song... sorry

Progression leads to the perfect note
And agression leads to a bloody throat
Please come now before I fall
Please come now or not at all and you...
Love it great way to end the song, especially the first 2 lines, how do you come up with this stuff?

All up this is really good, and I hope to see more of your stuff on here
hmmm... your ideas are interesting to me and i would like to subscribe to your newsletter - homer simpson
#5
This is cool. It really reminds me of how i felt about a girl a while ago (or still do). Great work.
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#6
I love this song. Excellent.If you ever get a recording i would love to hear it.
~gtrfrk


founder of the dunlop pick fan club


RIP Roger "Syd" Barrett


"Let the good times roll"