#1
I'm new at writting songs and need some constructive crittism. So yes this sucks is acceptable, just tell me why it does.

Crossfire

Before before before before-or-or
Things were so much better
Take me back
Back in time
Build me something so I can rewind
Is it my fault?

Caught in the crossfire
You words are like bullets
Polluting the air with words I don?t wanna hear.
Caught in the crossfire he shot in the leg
Should I let you bleed or cut it off?

If it was me I?m sorry mom and dad.
But please please oh please
Please don?t make me choose
Dad and mom
Mom and dad
Take me back
Let me rewind I?ll change time.

Caught in the crossfire
You words are like bullets
Polluting the air with words I don?t wanna hear.
Caught in the crossfire he shot in the leg
Should I let you bleed or cut it off?

If it bleeds
You will bleed forever
But if its amputated
I will bleed forever
If it bleeds
You will bleed forever
But if its amputated
I will bleed forever

Caught in the cross fire? like bullets, like bullets.
Let you bleed let you BLEED. Oh god don?t AMPUTATE!!!

Caught in the crossfire
You words are like bullets
Polluting the air with words I don?t wanna hear.
Caught in the crossfire he shot in the leg
Should I let you bleed or cut it off?


Send this to Austin


The next time I see you will be to far away
I?ve been couting the time till I see you month and five days

I?ve counting the months
I?ve be counting the hours
Until ill get to be with you

The tide goes in and out
I try to forget about
The thought of not seeing you tomorrow

Time?s gone by way to fast
Why can?t good things last?
When will I see you again?
[verse 2]
We?ll pick up right where we were a couple of months ago
I have so much to tell you, you really need to know.

[chorus]

Drop my commitments
Just drop everything
I?m callin up a cab
Yeah

[chorus]

cant wait, tell what i need to improve on. I know i need better literay elements.

-cinnamon