Concrete and iron stole your identity
The fall mangled and twisted reality
Do remember how to talk
Left your voice on this sidewalk
Concussion erases everything you had
Scarred on the elevated land

Chance of recovery was nil
What happened to your strength
What happened to your will
The reaper touches and heart rate drops
The scythe cuts and breathing stops

Death embraced you in its grip
Potions and machines tried to delay
But you just had to make the trip

God couldn?t bear to see you suffer
So he brought back home
Reclaimed you as his own
Rest in peace finally
The torture has stopped
Time to live happily

I kneel and pray next to this coffin
I don?t shed a tear
Though I loved you
It?s better you?re not here
WOW!Awesome,Really!.......how did you find the inpiration to write like this?It's perfect!Rock ON!
I liked it, but the use of "nil" kinda threw me off. The only time I really hear that word is when I'm watching a soccer game. So reading these words about death and then suddenly seeing that word pop up was a little distracting. I can see why you use it, to rhyme with will, but in my opinion you could find something that fits better. thrill, spill, kill, chill, drill, still, mill... those are a few examples... I liked it though, keep it up...