#1
i'll be the first to admit that i'm not well versed in powertab. but i figure the best way to learn how to use it is to use it.

this is a song that i got inspired to write while listening to a lot of Bon Jovi, although it probably sounds nothing like it. any constructive criticism would be nice, like advice on how to make it better. it's probably crap, but i at least think that the main riff is pretty good. and it's definately better than my last composition.
Attachments:
untitled6andmidi.zip
GAS List:
Nothing
#2
I think it sounds nothing like Bon Jovi which is a huge plus in my book. I actually like it a lot. It sounds more gothic than anything else if you ask me.

As for criticism, some of the chords sounded kind of ugly. It sort of sounded like the two guitar parts clashed a little bit. That may just be what I'm hearing though.

Good job.
Last edited by opivy21 at May 20, 2006,
#3
Your correct in your analysis, it is versed horribly. That said, if you reworked it a bit then it'd sounds fine. Reworking like in change some of the harminization so that it is harmonized, Change around then notes (8th's and 16th's) so they'd flow better. Over all 6/10.

I say that because it does seem unfinished, it was indeed boring, some notes didnt fit together at all, and I know you could probally do better. No offense though

EDIT: P.S. You really could have a good dark and melodic song on your hands, rewrite it and dont give up on it unless its utterly horrible.
Quote by rocknrollstar
"Oh baby baby yes yes YES! YES! *pinch harmonic*"
#4
thanks for the vote of confidence. i'm probably gonna start rewriting parts of it now. ahhh..the benefits of being unemployed, i can write whenever i want.
GAS List:
Nothing
#5
Quote by Flummery
thanks for the vote of confidence. i'm probably gonna start rewriting parts of it now. ahhh..the benefits of being unemployed, i can write whenever i want.




lucky you
Quote by rocknrollstar
"Oh baby baby yes yes YES! YES! *pinch harmonic*"
#6
i reworked it a bit. redid the main riff, fixed the clashing of the two guitar parts and made the solo actually a little bit more of a solo.
Attachments:
untitledandmidireworked.zip
GAS List:
Nothing
#7
Wow, This is horrible. You really need to read up on some theory. The lead lines don't work. It's all chromatic. You need to write within the key in order for it to sound good.

Edit: After listening to the second version, i noticed that you improved on it alot from where it was. Well, that is, until i got to solo. It's horrible. Just a bunch of random notes.

Edit Again: Also, the first mesure with the lead, the lead line is too long. You need to take out an 8th note.
Last edited by Evian at Jun 7, 2006,
#9
It definitely does show a lot of improvement than from before. Good job with changing the random notes to notes that actually fit. I'd let you listen to one that i'm putting together bud i don't know how to get it into here. I'm pretty new at this.

Good job with yours though!
#10
Hey i just put this together recently. I don't really know where i'm going with it, but tell me how it sounds so far. If you have any suggestions, feel free to critique it. tell me what you think
Attachments:
Some riffs.zip
#11
Quote by guitarrkid
Hey i just put this together recently. I don't really know where i'm going with it, but tell me how it sounds so far. If you have any suggestions, feel free to critique it. tell me what you think


next time you should make your own thread.

i like it. i'm a fan of the whole gradually getting more complicated thing. all the notes fit together and it transitions well. i really like the bassline. longer would be nice. keep going with it and you could quite possibly have a good song on your hands.
GAS List:
Nothing
#12
hey sorry man. like i said, i'm new at this. i will next time. thanks for the crit though, ill make it longer and get a new version soon.
#13
Alright first of all thanks flummery for the nice review you gave my song. Ok, I listenedto all three version and your third was definately the best in fact it sounded great. I loved the way the lead sounds. Also the solo was pretty freakin cool. The only problem was the last notes. I think it would sound much better if you ended it with an E power chord instead of A. (e would be 6th string- open 5th strng- 2 4th string 2) because I think the song is in that key, just try it and see if it sounds a little better, other than that it was great, you improved on it very well.
#14
The first version of the song sounds very messy and many notes feel out of place (some more so than others). I feel it gets a tad repetitive after a while.

In the second version, I noticed that one of the bars (I can't recall which one) had an extra eigth note and it sounded very sour. And the solo wasn't very pleasing, but a very good improvement from the original. The end seems too sudden and to drone on for too long though.

The third copy of it was much better. The harmonizing of the two guitars was much better than in the previous versions. The solo could still be reworked to fit better with the song. Some parts seem to come in suddenly and end abruptly which can be confusing. The ending is still to long and abrupt.

I think that you could work this up to something better if you keep going with it.

EDIT: To that random guy who posted in here, that was pretty cool I have to admit >.< sounded good.
#15
You 3rd revision was good, but i didn't notice that until i listen to the first and scrolled down the page.
Um, really wasn't a bad song, a few note length problems here and there but thats just simple things that maybe you're new on powertab to. I dunno. You said you like constructive critisism, put in some solo leads that lead into your phrases, cause right now its just an e minor, c minor, a minor, which is fine but later on in the song when you're really rockin i would have some little diddilies to lead into those chords.