#1
if you would please just read this and give me your honest opinion, its ok if you think it sucks, just tell me how to fix it. and possibly help come up with a name


my expression has been melted,
my pride has been stolen,
still, i will not let you tear this down
and further push my decadence

while i slowly climb away
you break and beat me
drown me in your mediocrity
and in peices i lay
once more i am broken
once more i am whole

like a coward i rot in silence
in a modest belligerant hole
i must rebuild what you've destroyed
and slowly tear it away again

while i slowly climb away
you break and beat me
drown me in your mediocrity
and in peices i lay
once more i am broken
once more i am whole

but when i finaly come out
you will be thrown down
and untill you wash away your ego
i will hold you in that hole
When the power of love conquers the love of power, the world will know peice- hendrix
#2
It really is OK. It sounds like many other lyrics. If you make this into a specific storyline, it might make it different enough to make it much better. justy an suggestion.

plz crit
Bard Morons - Tick Tock Tick Tock