#2
Listening to it now:

The intro is kind of boring because you just palm mute the same chord over and over. You could try adding a few other chords, or maybe put some fills in here to make it more interesting.

Around 55 seconds the guitar becomes harder to hear. Turn up the volume.

The lead sounds out of key a little a bit and doesn't contribute much to the song. You need to work on improving your phrasing.

I like the riff change around 1:55. It helps pick up the pace and energy.

The guitar with the effect that comes in at around 3:05 is kind of cool. See if you can make it more interesting though.

I like your ending. Although the song didn't seem to go anywhere, that is probably just because there are no vocals. I would like to hear this again after you have added vocals (that is, if you plan on adding them).

Mind critting mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=374791
#3
lol.......industrial drums.....gets me every time...

Tone is nice and crunchy. I think maybe you should change up the strumming pattern for the intro, make it a bit more interesting.

Riffs are catchy enough, but I think they'd be perfect for a lead.......oh, there it is...

Lead tone is kinda weak, I think maybe you should play the lead through both sides of the stereo, dont pan it to one side.

More upbeat riff....
Yeah, again, spice it up a bit with a cool lead! I'm sure you have the chops for it.
2:38 is great. Headbanging in all it's glory.

3:03 lead is trippy......light tremolo and delay? I like these last few leads that close out the song.

Cool tune, but I think maybe you should add a main solo, just so the song has some sort of climactic point.
Last edited by GardenGnome26 at Jun 12, 2006,
#4
leads are my main weak points. i guess i need to er somehow get betters. so you think my rhythm work is ok? if so, cool!
thanks a lot man
#5
rhythm riffs are decent enough, it's just that intro.......the drums are really interesting, but I'm dying for you to put some sort of catchy hook in there to start of the song. It would sound loads better.
#6
stronger more interesting intro, and I really didn't care for the rythym guitars tone, sounded alright when let open, but palm muted it just didn't fit the bill for me, maybe to much midrange. Lead is to quiet, the transition doesn't feel right, like it's out of time or something, no flow.

You recorded this direct after a pedal didn't you? Sounds processed.

Overall:
Alot to love, but I am left feeling like you could do so much more!!! Take some time, maybe actually get a band together and work on it, post back in a few months just to see how much you've learned!
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#7
at the intro drums are kool...
tone isnt that bad
the riff at 0:40 is kool again
seems like its fading out... turn up the volume

nicely composed man... u just need a lil mastering over your playing and ur done.. practise the instrumental more...im sure ull sound great

keep it up ,nice work (Y)
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