#1
This only goes up to the first verse, which is great considering it pretty much wrote itself. Now I'm still trying to decide if (and how) it should lead into the chorus, or if it should go into some sort of a bridge first.
Listen to the GP5 if you can, though the Midi's groovy too. It just doesn't do it justice, I think.
Anyway, crit for crit?

Oh, and don't mind the lyrics in the GP file for now. I butchered it, trying to make it fit the melody I wrote.
Attachments:
gemini.zip
Currently Playing:
1986 H-H Contemporary Fender Telecaster
Backup:
Ibanez Ex Series
Customized SSS Starter Stratocaster
#3
Are you talking about any part in particular? Maybe I'm not hearing what you're hearing, or I just don't know what you mean by it being random. The whole thing was basically written off of one riff in the same key (Em) except for a couple of passing tones for the vocal melody.
It'd be great if you could help me pinpoint the problem.
(Oh, and did you listen to the GP5 or the midi?)
Currently Playing:
1986 H-H Contemporary Fender Telecaster
Backup:
Ibanez Ex Series
Customized SSS Starter Stratocaster
#4
i thought it sounded really good, sometimes tho the sax sounded out of place
#5
Quote by thomeboy
i thought it sounded really good, sometimes tho the sax sounded out of place

I'm pretty sure he said to ignore the vocals, meaning the sax, Why can't people read these days? It sounds Ok, I don't really like the staccato'd guitar introduction. Personal preference though
#6
I really liked this song for some reason. At about 27 seconds in (I only listened to the midi, by the way), I really liked the way it sounded. And about 47/48 seconds or so, I really liked that too. That other guitar in the background (I believe it was a guitar, please correct me if I'm wrong) sonded really good at those two parts. As someone above said, the sax did seem a little out of place, but then someone said to ignore it. So besides the sax part (which should be ignored anyways), it sounded really cool. Can you crit one of my songs? Just check my sig to find them.
#7
Thanks.
Actually I don't mind the sax part being crit. It was the text (lyrics) I put above it, that I didn't want to be crit. So yes, crit the sax. It looks like I'm gonna be changing that anyway, based on the crits I got so far.
Currently Playing:
1986 H-H Contemporary Fender Telecaster
Backup:
Ibanez Ex Series
Customized SSS Starter Stratocaster