#1
Life is but a game
Filled with happiness and pain
Please continue on going
I'll keep that light shining

Staying in the game
It's hard I know
But it has to be done
I don't know why
There is no answer
So please don't cry

Used to never look
At the glass half full
Used to never look
And it made me seem like a fool

It could be forty two
And it could even be me and you
Noone really knows for sure
The thought of it is a bore

Used to never look
At the glass half full
Used to never look
And it made me seem like a fool
I LOVE YOU JESUS CHRIIIIST
JESUS CHRIST I LOVE YOU
YES I DOOOO
#2
not bad at all. the chorus is really catchy, and the rhymes in the verses are interesting and original. 8 out of 10.
B.C. RICH
#3
Quote by b.c.rich rules
not bad at all. the chorus is really catchy, and the rhymes in the verses are interesting and original. 8 out of 10.


Thanks, I appreaciate it.

To everyone else...

If you are going to read it, please crit it. It's annoying when a song gets views and only one of those viewers crits
I LOVE YOU JESUS CHRIIIIST
JESUS CHRIST I LOVE YOU
YES I DOOOO
#5
It was OK. The language is a little immature - try using more emotive language. There's a tonne of language devices out there that could help this song out tonnes. Metaphors and similes would work nicely.

"Noone really knows for sure
The thought of it is a bore"

Change that! It sounds like it was made up on the spot. Needs some work, but OK overall.
4/10.
The below is false.
The above is true.

*world implodes*
#6
I really didn't like it. Sorry! It probably needs some rewriting and such.

Overall, 6/10
When I heard smoking would kill me, I bought shares in Dunhill and Marlboro - Thomas Geraghty

If we don't change it, nothing will fucking change.
#7
Well... not much to say here pal... I don't really like it, it's cliched, not very original.... 4/10, max.
According to BS statistics, 92% of teens have moved on to rap. If you're among the 8% who doesn't consider rap to be real music, donate your brains, as you clearly aren't using them.