#1
ok this song is about this girl i knew for a long time for like 8 years and now she doesn't even talk to me and she talks to me like we never meet before, but this one is out to you !!!!!


A Hate Song

Flip 42

(verse1)
it is to late now
the damage is done
all love is distroyed
and nothing but anger runs
through my body
While all of my emotions
are running wild like a war
agenst love, hate and anger
but hate will always win

(chorse)
Hate me for what i am
Hate me for what i know
Hate me For what i Do
but i will never love you

(verse2)
i am nothing (more) but a Stranger to you
and all memories are burnt into ashes
hate it like flashes of lightning
dancing in a Storm of anger and hate
you never now when but it will strick

(Chorse)
Hate me for what i am
Hate me for what i know
Hate me for what i do
But i will never love you

(verse3)
The fight has just ended
and hate has been defeted
nothing more is left but peace
love has won the battle
but the battle has only just started

(Chore)
Hate me for what i am
hate me for what i know
Hate me for what i say
but hate and anger is here to stay

(end)

ok i now i am still working on it, but tell me what you think of it
"It is better to burn out then to fade away"-Kurt Cobain

"Keep you friends close, but your enemies closer"-The GodFather Part III

? W T F ?
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")

?^? ?(?¿?)? ?^?...put this guy in your sig
#2
its ok. how is it supposed to be sung? like whats the beat and melody
myspace.com/thecarlandbenextravaganza1

my band ^
#3
sounds good, accept the chorus reminds me of hate me by blue october, lol.

only a little bit though...other wise, it sounds good so far
#4
do you know how to spell?
Schecter Gryphon
Peavey Classic 30
Boss Ds-1 Distortion Pedal
Heritage VIP 1(would like to sell)
#5
^ nah man, did you see the one he posted yesterday?

i wasn't a fan of that one and im not a fan of this one.

the verses are jumbled messes with absolutely no flow at all.
the end of the third verse doesn't make sense within the context of the song.
the metaphors that you use for the most part aren't that good, like the lightning thing.
and also the choruses dont make any sense. you're saying "hate me for this, hate me for this, hate me for this, but i wont love you." im pretty sure if this person hates you for all these reasons, they dont care if you ever love them. using the word 'but' means that these are things that should get you to love them, but you're not going to. personally when someone hates me for a bunch of reasons it gives me no inclination to love them.

also you should learn to spell. im not gonna rip on you for that because im pretty sure you're like 12. and im not insulting your age, im just stating that's my interpretation.
Quote by lefty_strat_str
Only buy guitars that have had their wood harvested from the north side of the tree, during the summer solstice, by virgin druids suffering from dwarfism. Next stupid question, please.
#6
for your info mr. Elmore Fudd (bbsbass) AKA smart ase i am 13 and yes i am aware of my whole song and i would love to see your song you made up from scratch, but then again i would never read it beacues the lyrics and the rhythem will probaly sound like a peice of ****!!
"It is better to burn out then to fade away"-Kurt Cobain

"Keep you friends close, but your enemies closer"-The GodFather Part III

? W T F ?
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")

?^? ?(?¿?)? ?^?...put this guy in your sig
#7
hey man, thats the point of posting songs here. to get criticism on them. i gave you criticism. you can get upset about it, or you can take what i said and see if there are things you can improve. thats the point of criticism. yes, maybe i sounded a little harsh. but you have to realize that everyone's not gonna say good things about your work.

if you were paying attention you would have seen me say that i was not making fun of your age. i was 13 once too. hell i dont even think i listened to music when i was 13, so i have no room to judge any songwriters based on their age.

also, i have the links to the two songs i've submitted on the bottom of my post. go ahead and click them and check them out. post whatever you like. ill take any comments on mine.
Quote by lefty_strat_str
Only buy guitars that have had their wood harvested from the north side of the tree, during the summer solstice, by virgin druids suffering from dwarfism. Next stupid question, please.
#8
ok i apoligize i got a little mad but i pledge my self to you teachings what would your suggestion be like what would be good to improve this song?
"It is better to burn out then to fade away"-Kurt Cobain

"Keep you friends close, but your enemies closer"-The GodFather Part III

? W T F ?
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")

?^? ?(?¿?)? ?^?...put this guy in your sig