#1
Deeper Within

Crawl deeper within me,
Heal the wounds and stitch together.

Baptise in dark and crucify in fire,
Evil the root cut too short.


Believe in me,
Travel far to find.
Still the need,
Am i blind?


Forced to believe,
The lies in me.
Nothing seems,

To be real.
These eye's decieve,
Deeper with!



Flesh turns to stone in pain,
Sear the wicked into me and coware.

You see more than the need to live,
Darkness embedded in me.


Forced to believe,
The lies in me.
Nothing seems,

To be real.
These eye's decieve,
Deeper Within!
Life is My Mistake, the Responsibility Held By No One Else
I'm Leaving Footprints in the Ashes of the Fallen
#4
I think this will mean more to you than your audience, it feels like you are conveying anguish personal to you, and are not looking for help just the need to express your emotions . The style is original, some lines have a sort of incompleteness about them, and I reckon you aimed for that, to compliment the overall effect. Pretty good for a first attempt, so keep it up.