#1
tell me your opinion please

A Song from my heart

There came a time
For every song I sang
to make me cry

I think about you everyday
But it has gone too far

You took my love
You took my soul
And its way too hurt

There's something secret
Smell of death
Right inside my heart

Chorus
I'm trapped inside this story
There's no place to hide
And now you get to know this
This song from my heart

And now it's over
Now it ends
Nothing left to share

Guitar Bridge

Chorus
I'm trapped inside this story
There's no place to hide
And now you get to know this
This song from my heart

Outro
You ought to know
This song's for you
This song is from my heart
#2
is this meant to be a slow song? if it is i think it's pretty damn good. It's not overly long and it works quiet well. Then again i'm not brilliant at annalysing songs but still I think it's good
Songs working on :

Nitelife
#3
yeah it is slow, it already has a tune I hope I'll record it soon thanks for writing
#4
hmm...its a good song, but not very well written, the idea is a little cliche. The flow overall is good, but the verses are a little too short. If this were a song I kinda picture it as an Evanescence-esque sound. The chorus seems a little weak.

8/10

If you could, can you check out mine? its in my sig, the first one.(As Pictures Fade Away)

thx.
#5
thank you, the verses are too short because it suppose to be like that, that's why the first part has 4 verses

I crit your song
thanks again
#6
I feel it...very deep and very real to me. I like the line "smell of death/Right inside my heart." --original
#8
im really bad at digesting lyrics that contain the words love or death or of the sort, thy just come off cheesy and lame to me (take for example every hawthorne hights song) but it does seem to have realy come from your heart so rock on