#1
I could be the king of your court


the tin mans orchestra materializes into the cabaret hall, as they brush through the cobwebs and oil their hinges we get caught in the webs they spin.
I was hanging from an exotic tree where my child used to swing, now where vultures stalk their prey. He was three and died in my arms. I prayed for his little lungs to pull through I swear I did. He was buried in my matress, so every night I could still put him to sleep.
And from that same tree I saw a girl at the end of the tunnel with a flashlight in her hand. she's a treasure map if I may, hidden beauty which I was quick to find. she said it was not okay to say anything, but it was okay to kiss, and so we did. sooner than later I had to leave for the midwest, so I packed her in my suitcase and carried on my way.
don't say a word blue eyes, you had me at, "Sir you are going to need to put me down, I am not carry on luggage." Well would you like to come to my castle? I could be the king of your court and tell you how this all ties in. We can "sleep" on my matress, we can "sleep" on my child, because he loves it when you rock his carriage. Or I'll buy you some diamonds, or drop you off at a convenient store. Convenience isn't hard to come by when you're sleeping with the whole neighborhood.
Last edited by falloutboy at Jul 2, 2006,
#2
Interesting.

I'll say this now, I am bad at the whole interpreting meanings thing, so I found this a bit confusing..

It was definitely an interesting read, but I can't really crit this lack of experience

He was three and died and my arms.

And my arms? Surely you mean "In my arms?"

All in all, this was a good read, some very cool ideas in there, and I think it was worded alright, and you managed to keep your tone throughout.

Critting back? Love your opinion on my latest, found here , many thanks.
#5
Dude.

I loved this.

Aside from some errors in punctuation and so forth, it was awesome.
#6
It's good every now and then for a singer/songwriter to read something that humbles him. Well, my friend, thanks for blowing me away. This is probably the most meaningful bit of verse I've found on this site. 10/10
Originally posted by Grimster
This couple was doing like this romantic shoot like in there house, and all of a sudden a clown walked in and jizzed on the guys face. That is the true meaning of christmas.