#1
This is an acoustic piece that I wrote for a girl. So yes, it's probably just another silly love song but crit it anyways.

I walk to where the lights of my hometown shine.
It's a sight for eyes.
She talks and I hear everything she says; soaking it all in.
Making me think on such a different level.
I am absolutely beside myself with life,
And I can't help but smile and think of how sweet her laughter sounds.

So I'm walking; more like flying.
And that's when i realize that
Walking to you wouldn't be half as hard as giving up.
I think about how I've begun to live my life to make you happy.
And how I use every fiber in my body to get you to smile a little wider.
Don't ever change. Promise?
#2
I actually liked this, despite it's length (I am a fan of longer pieces myself). Its simplicity does it justice because there is not a lot of things to write about in a love song, so you've done it well without repeating yourself. A hard thing to do is to become so involved you forget about rhythm, rhyme, tone. The piece flows well although I did have difficulty to find a rhythm at first. You don't have a rhyme scheme so I can't condemn anything on that perspective. Tone is okay, pretty standard for a love song.

If you could, could you crit Skaithin' Symphonies & Murtherin' Melodies? It's in my sig, with a link to a translated one. Thank you.